30th birthday dinner

[imclaustrophobicdarren]

If you were invited, would you expect to pay for yourself?

It would depend how the invitation was worded, and on how that group normally organised finances for outings.

It really depends, I paid for everyone at dp 30th, they were all expecting to pay their own but half of them are struggling and drinks were ordered and paid at the bar seperately. The bill was less than 200 quid which is what we would expect to pay for a nice evening meal and drinks just the 2 of us so I picked up the tab.
I think it very much depends on the group dynamics.

Yes I would expect to pay for myself. But you won't get anything useful from this thread because it really polarises people.

You will get some people saying that it is utterly outrageous to invite people out to a meal and not pay and some like me who think that's totally normal and expected.

It will run to about 23 pages and you'll end up none the wiser.

@DappledThings this did cross my mind

I invited people to DHs 30th dinner last year. I paid for everyone. Half the people assumed they would be paying for themselves, the other half didn't even offer.

I would expect at least a big contribution from the hosts eg all the drinks paid for. I was invited to a friend's 40th though and had to pay for my own in full- it was really expensive too. I wouldn't have a celebration like that unless I was willing to fork out at least half of the whole cost.

I would assume it would be paid for if I was 'invited'. It largely depends on how you are wording the invite. However expect plenty of people to decline if they are having to pay, they may wish to spend their money in other ways.

If you don't want/can't afford to pay, then ask everyone to bring a dish and host the dinner at home.

I would expect to pay as I have never been to a milestone birthday party where the guests would be cunty enough to let the host pay for anything.

Yes I’d expect to pay for myself. Unless it was a buffet style party. In fact I think I’d suggest splitting the cost of the birthday persons meal among the invitees. Much better for several people to pay for one meal instead of birthday person paying for everyone’s meal.

Yes. Unless otherwise specified, I have never been invited out for a birthday meal where anyone expected anything other than to pay for themselves - and this is as true where hosts and all attendees have been higher earners as it has been where there’s an income mix.

If anything, if I go out with friends for birthday meals, often everyone clubs together to pay for the birthday boy/girl rather than the other way around.