Am I right in thinking this was a bit creepy?

[FinnMcMissile]

I took DS(5) trick or treating tonight at hus request. Lots of houses decorated, nice atmosphere. On the way back home we passed a house that was well decorated- must have had about 8 pumpkins lit up outside. An old man was standing in the window holding a pumpkin and staring out. It seemed creepy and don't ask me why we didn't just walk straight past. Anyway, man answers door and DS says "trick or treat". Man says in a creepy voice "what kind of tricks do you have?". DS didn't know what to say, the man asked a couple more times about tricks and then gave DS a treat. As we were leaving he said "do you like my pumpkins?"

I don't know why I didn't say to him that he was being weird and creepy. British awkwardness I guess.

It honestly sounds like someone trying to put on a Halloween show and you/your DS having misunderstood it, rather than some dangerous predator. As PP have said, some people's Halloween expectations are that DC will perform a turn of some sort before they get their treat.
Maybe next year teach your DS a little spooky joke to offer, or a brief party piece? I would really imagine that if he'd come out with 'What do ghosts have for lunch? SPOOKHETTI!' or something like that, everyone would have felt fine.
And 'Do you like my pumpkins?' is not a wierd inappropriate question if someone has, you know, decorated and displayed pumpkins for Halloween...

Also in Scotland, absolutely have to earn your treat where we are - jokes, songs, dances etc all welcome, throwing eggs at houses (as happened where I grew up in England) not at all the done thing!

I think he sounds awesome. Halloween is supposed to be weird and creepy.

Poor bloke. I think I would have quite liked effort he had done to. It's Halloween, I'm sure he's not standing at his window staring at kids the rest of the year

Seriously OP?! I think you have completely over-reacted and are reaching ridiculous conclusions about a man who seems to have made an effort for Halloween. My 12 yr old DD stayed in tonight to hand out treats and put on a scary mask to open the door. Most kids loved it, two small children cried. We felt bad but their parents recognised it was Halloween and she didn't know how old the children were before opening the door. If your children are "sensitive" then either be ready to support them and explain it is all a bit of fun or don't take them trick and treating.

You always get a couple of houses who just miss the mark and come off a bit weird imo

How on earth are they to know what's considered an acceptable response by strangers who knock unsolicited on their doors after dark and then demand sweets or otherwise threaten to do something unpleasant?

I don't personally like the idea of Trick or Treat as I don't think it teaches children healthy boundaries (I'll be called ridiculous, I know), but surely, if you do do it, you only go to people you actually know and have pre-arranged to visit, don't you?

If you go to strangers and (theoretically) threaten them on their own doorsteps, I really don't see how you're in a position to then appraise them on the appropriateness of their response, especially when they're only giving as good as they get in the spirit of the event.

Love the poem, Titiana :-). It's a good one.

I think the op is being too suspicious for her own good, mums often have good instincts but they are sometimes misplaced.

No harm done, move on.

I just watched some clips on Twitter of kids being interviewed (with their parents, obviously) about Halloween for our local news. They all had a joke for the reporter. Best one - what do you call a fat pumpkin? A plumpkin.

Sounds to me like he was just role playing and being self-consciously creepy. Some people answer the door holding a toy knife or chainsaw, doesn't mean they're murders!

I do see your point and I would probably be the same.

However, if I died early and DH was widowed he would be that old man. DH loves sweets and vehemently believes that gorging on sugar is a privilege of childhood. He would love giving treats to kids in the most warm hearted and non creepy way.

There was a man where we live tonight insisting the children perform in order to get a sweet. I don’t mind the idea of it but DS was horribly embarrassed and shy, and chose to leave without a sweet. It all seemed a bit mean-spirited to me!

Imagine him choosing pumpkins then spending all day carefully carving them. Buying chocolates and sweets in ready. Really making the effort to join in. Tries to think of something to say to the little kids when they knock.

Then someone goes on the internet to call him creepy. I feel really sorry for him. I hope everyone else was a bit more appreciative. Poor bloke.

Sad face maybe a bit ott but you get my drift.

I've not heard of the trick being a song or joke before - always thought it was something like letting the tyres down on their car or throwing eggs at the house. The idea then being that the owner of the house gives the trick or treater a treat so that they don't play a nasty trick.

I was sat outside my house dressed as a clown. You'd hate me! 😂

Ffs maybe he was getting into the Halloween spirit and instead you've posted about him being pervy. Maybe it's the mind it goes into and not from the mouth it was said from..... 🎃

Oh heck my Dh will be that old man one day, he loves Halloween, he's been getting ready for ages. Made a Dalek that moves for the front lawn. Then dressed up and sat in the front window like a statue, spooky lights. All the kids were looking in (and parents) then he'd wave and they would scream, the parents were killing themselves laughing, I handed the candy out. Now if you live in our village I've just outed myself

Ffs, trick or treat is, traditionally, a two way street. Surely people don't take their kids out begging without at least a semblance of an idea what a blooming trick is? Isn't that rather missing the point?

@EnidButton you've got me feeling all emotional for a total stranger! Poor guy.

My trick as a small child was always to pull out a fake spider and scare the person if they said trick. I always say "what's your trick" ...normal no?!

OP you’ve got some pretty warped views, both about trick or treating and older men. Give yer head a wobble

Although it’s tempting to pitch our decorations/costumes/responses to the age-group of my kid and her mates, I’m aware enough to check who has come knocking before I launch anything too creepy in their direction. I have a giant swooping bat & spider, and a couple of other sound-based spooky things that I hold back on if the kid is under 5.

I remember how much my kid loved Halloween as a tot, but really could be fairly traumatised by some of the gore. That said, my sweets bowl has a motion sensor that sends a skeleton hand out to grab any hand taking a sweet. I love the reactions- the little kids don’t get as much of a scare as some teenagers do!

The old dude might find it harder than your average mum to pitch his ‘act’ just right for your kid, OP, but it probably worked just fine on all the older kids. You’ll see that your kid will beg you to go to that house first as he gets older! Until then, it really is up to you to know your kid and manage the interaction. The neighbourhood doesn’t owe you anything. You may be better being a Halloween ‘base house’ where you can do things your way, while he’s little/shy/easily worried.

I wish I had more people like your neighbour near me, so would the kids around here. Sounds like he really got into the spirit.

I don't personally like the idea of Trick or Treat as I don't think it teaches children healthy boundaries (I'll be called ridiculous, I know

Not by me, I agree with you

Well when I were a lass... We did 'trick or treating' in the 'give us a treat or we'll take revenge with a trick' sense, in England.

(Not American, not Scottish - a totally different tradition from guising).

So the 'what are your tricks' line is the person weighing up whether they need to bribe you to go away with a treat, or not.

OP, according to Wikipedia you are right in terms of American trick or treating, that a “trick” is a “punishment” for someone who gives no treats. It looks like Scotland and Ireland expect a “trick” to receive the treats, which is what some posters (me included) are thinking of.

From Wikipedia:

There is a significant difference from the way the practice has developed in North America with the jocular threat. In Scotland and Ireland, the children are only supposed to receive treats if they perform a party trick for the households they go to. This normally takes the form of singing a song or reciting a joke or a funny poem which the child has memorised before setting out.[48] Occasionally a more talented child may do card tricks, play the mouth organ, or something even more impressive, but most children will earn plenty of treats even with something very simple. Often they won't even need to perform.[52] While going from door to door in disguise has remained popular among Scots and Irish at Halloween, the North American saying "trick-or-treat" has become common.