Feeling of emptiness. Nothing happening in my life

[thecatsarecrazy]

I'm feeling very low at the moment. Like life has no meaning.
I'm married with 3 children. I'm greatful to have them in my life but everything is so hard and overwhelming. I have nothing going on in my life. No friends. I'm a sahm my husband is out all day. I just go through the motions. My youngest goes to preschool 3 half days a week but in that time I either clean or do a bit of exercise. No time to go anywhere. My dad is in his late 70s and I fear he may have dementia. In getting calls from his next door neighbor. I don't drive and live an hour away so im pretty useless. I have recently been on the pill I took the last one on Friday. I decided to stop because it was making me depressed. I hoped I would feel better soon but everything is a struggle.
Me and dh went away Saturday night but it was awful. The people in the next room kept me up half the night so that was ruined. I have nothing to look forward to. I used to love this time of year but I feel so flat

It sounds like you are in this sandwich generation OP where you’re juggling your children and your dad and just general life admin but not getting a lot of time for you . Are you an only child ? It’s a lot of worry for you about your dad .

I have a brother who lives with him but he works all-day. Even a shopping trip is a highlight for me. I hate being stuck in. Where I live is boring.

Try running! I could have written your post a few years ago, but since taking up running, I’ve become much better at forging out time for myself, while also getting fitter and healthier (mentally and physically).

How about learning to drive?

It would give you something to work towards, a sense of achievement and would enable you to get out and about a bit and visit your Dad too

Would learning to drive change things up a bit? Not so you can always be backwards and forward to your dad’s, bit so you can get out and about more, and get some freedom. It might help generate a sense of things moving forward, mastery of a new skill, etc.

Is there anything else you’d like to learn now get involved with? When does your youngest start school? Could they go to nursery for a bit longer each week to give you time to get out and do more meaningful and rewarding things than cleaning and exercise?

It strikes me that you may lack a sense of meaning or purpose (beyond motherhood), and it might be worthwhile exploring that.

Probably.rubbish suggestions...

Gym/jogging
Volunteer eg dog walk for local rescue or a charity shop
Have a look in local community centre for activities - book clubs, craft
Art/sewing/baking

Maybe it wasn’t the pill that was making you depressed. Maybe you are suffering from depression. Family life can be really hard, it sounds like you need some help. Talk to someone.

And don’t let your contraceptive gap become an pregnancy, unless that’s what you want.