BEARD PROBLEMS

[annahdarling890]

So...this is quite a strange issue...I've been dating for over 2 years and my boyfriend has always been very careful with his beard or general hygiene, but the last few months there's always been an issue with that, it gets to the point where I have to ask him to clip his fingernails or trim his beard because it grows very fast and it gets very irritating to kiss him and have his moustache almost touching my mouth, I understand that it take time and pacience and I already spoke to him about that a few times but he doesn't care and doesn't even bother to get it trimmed even tough it bothers me a lot, I always have to keep bringing that up until he finally decides to do it, that happens every month, I'm getting very tired of having to do that all the time. What should I do to get him to understand that?

How's his mental health? A sudden lack of personal care would worry me.

@Justmuddlingalong He is alright, I think this is just because he doesn't want to waste his time doing that, he would rather spend time playing video games, which I don't judge at all but it's getting to the point where I HAVE to ask him to do such simple things, he even has a trimmer, which makes things easier, he just can't be bothered to do it, or maybe he just feels like it's fine. Thank you for your concern. That's a different way of thinking about the issue.

Is his playing video games restricting other things?

Do you seriously want to be with a man who puts playing video games over personal hygiene?

He does it in his free time the problem is that every time he has "free time" that's all he does, sometimes I even play with him for a bit but then when it comes to do other stuff I just have to ask him to do it, i'ts not like he's addicted but it's irritates me that even with plenty of free time he just can't seem to understand that it would take like 10 mins from his time to just take care of himself and that would make me so happy cause I can't stand to look at him and see his beard all over the place, it makes him look older even though he's only 24 and I don't like that. I just don't want him to take me for granted and think "she loves me, so she will still love me if I don't take care of myself or I don't need to take care of myself, it's a waste of time" I don't care about appearence, but it still bothers me that he just wants to play games all day

@Ragwort When I said personal hygiene I just meant clipping his nails or trim his beard and some other "hair", he takes showers and uses deodorant and takes care of himself but just doesn't care about his beard, that's the only issue here, I consider taking care of beard hair or clipping nails also a part of his hygiene.

Why would you want to be with someone who only ever wanted to play video games in their free time? And how is this not him being addicted?

You've already voiced how this makes you feel. You're his girlfriend, not his mum. He's 24 not 12. You shouldn't be having to remind him to do the basics. He's ignoring your request. What do you think you should do?

@Justmuddlingalong Well...everytime I have to remind him of that I kind of feel like his mum, because that's what she used to do.

Can’t you see that he is addicted to his video games? , you have to ‘ask him’ to do other stuff? Do you live together? Does he share the housework, cooking, shopping etc? Do you have dates and enjoy doing things together?

Seriously, look at your life now ... is this how you want to live? When I was 24 & with a boyfriend we were out on dates, having fun, doing things together .., I wouldn’t put up with someone who couldn’t be bothered to clip his nails .

Do you live together?

FFS don’t have kids with this manchild.