Talking to your baby in another language

[Imtootired]

Hi, this might sound a bit weird. I’ve been learning a second language for a few years now. I absolutely love it but I’m definitely not fluent yet. I’m having a baby soon and was thinking about speaking to my baby in the other language some of the time. Obviously not all the time. My uni tutor in my language classes was talking to me about this and was saying he does it with his nephew and it’s great. It is supposed to be very good for brain development. I’m just not sure about it because for a start the language doesn’t come naturally to me yet and everyone else we know will be speaking English. I was thinking of getting one of those “1000 words in” books and maybe taking him to a playgroup where they speak this language. Just not sure whether I’ll confuse him if we’re mixing up the languages. Has anyone done anything like this?

Best to do it all the time so they just know both languages from the start.

I worked with a Greek lady married to an English man (they lived in England).

She spoke to the child exclusively in Greek only and the husband, tv and obviously nursery and general public spoke to her in English.

By 3 she flitted between the 2 languages with ease it was amazing!!!

Jimdandy
That person was speaking her mother tongue to the child! The OP doesn't speak the language well! Totally different situation. Her child won't do what happens when you grow up with two different mother tongues at home.

Thanks there are some good ideas and advice here. @barberbabble that’s so funny about your baby! Yes I think it is very good for brain development to grow up bilingual. If I was fluent in two I would definitely give it a go. I understand exactly what people are saying about limiting your child’s vocabulary if you speak to them in a language that you aren’t fluent in. Even friends studying the language who are finishing their degrees after entering in at advanced level say that they often choose the simple/easy way to say something and the next step would be massively increasing vocabulary and getting the nuances right. And to really do that I think you’d need to live in the country for a while and read all your books/news in the other language. A babysitter who speaks the language is a really good idea. Plus I think I will do the books, cartoons and playgroup and see how they go with that. I won’t speak it too much to them other times because I won’t be the best teacher and also I don’t want to leave my older son out

@kristallen I don’t agree.

It’s not “totally” different. Speaking in 2 different languages is speaking in 2 different languages whether you are fluent or your mother tongue the principle is the same!!

@Jimdandy I think @kristallen and others mean that your grammar and pronunciation won’t be perfect if you aren’t fluent in the language so you won’t teach the child a big enough vocabulary and they will learn any mistakes you make. I’d love to do it but on second thought it will be too difficult and I think I’ll teach my baby it as a second language

I find it a shame that non-native English speakers don’t use/teach their dc the language.
@Cherrysoup, the thing is I think most people do try to speak their mother tongue to their dcs.
But it’s hard, seriously it can be f** hard to keep it up.

When they are little, it’s very easy but as soon as they start school and spend the whole day speaking and thinking in English, to revert back to another language isn’t easy for the child. They will have learnt words in English that they dint know in the other language. They will have experienced the day in English and lived it in English and talking about in another language is hard. To be able to do so you need a real fluency in both languages that children don’t have for a long time (at least not mines anyway ), even if they are bilingual.
That means children slowly but surely stop speaking that language when they start school. It’s not that parents don’t want to or haven’t tried... it’s the child that is very stubbornly refusing to speak that language.
Plus add the fact parents are often very self conscious if they speak in a different language and will chose to speak English when out and about to avoid sticking out too or so that they don’t appear to be rude. So you will only hear speak in English to them.
(And that’s wo talking about the teachers who make you feel bad about raising your child bilingual. My dcs have had one of those too....)

@Imtootired, I think it’s a wise idea.
I hope you and your baby will enjoy it!

My children (and many hundreds of children) speak English at home, but go to welsh language schools from the age of 3/4 and become fluently bilingual. I started using Welsh words/stories/songs as babies.

I'm now going to classes to try to catch up, but as an adult my brain is a fossilised apple compared to their sponge like brains, so I find it very hard! (And they laugh at my pronunciation)

But having become bilingual as a child, they should be well set to learn extra languages later in life (so the theory goes)
I can't say I've experienced and detrimental effects from it.

@HeyNotInMyName teachers make you feel bad that your child is bilingual? Bonkers!

One of the students I was thinking about , it’s the dad that’s not English, so double hard to get the child to speak his language, I think, as most dads seem to have paternity leave then go back to work. Another, same group, is autistic and has trouble processing English. I guess there are loads of reasons why a child might not speak the parent’s language.

I’m having fun with a wee lad from the Ivory Coast currently; he’s my excellent assistant. His understanding and speaking are fabulous, writing-very typical of a native speaker-not so great so mum wanted him in a French class.

@Jimdandy well it depends what you consider "speaking two languages". Bilingual means fluent in two. If a child's input for one of those languages is faulty, it will not be fluent. Therefore OPs child won't be bilingual. They could grow up with an appreciation for foreign language learning and cultures though, which isn't half bad, especially these days!

I feel the urge to tell you about a cat in a bar in Ghent in Belgium. You may be aware that language is a touchy subject in Belgium, especially in some towns and villages, though Ghent does not appear to be one.

I spoke to the cat in Dutch (Flemish) as did the owner of the bar, and received a friendly response. Two men came in and a conversation began, but one only spoke French so this was the language we spoke in. The cat continued being friendly to me, the bar owner, and the man who could speak both French and Dutch, but completely ignored the man who could only speak French.

I think you should use your other language, but not all the time.

hi. we're doing it with german and italian. I have that exact same 1000 first words book. the problem with it is that they get bored pretty fast. I think the thing we do most is stick on a cartoon in that language. it's pretty easy on Netflix just to swtich the language. And songs too, did you know there are loads of international versions of Let it Go. Although, once you get started, it's easy to get carried away - my kids weren't keen on the Italian version, but the loved the Finnish version! Oh well!! : )

I disagree with several of the early responders. I think you should do it! I am raising bilingual kids and it's a wonderful gift to give your child. If you're planning on surrounding your baby with people who speak this language as their mother tongue then they'll hear it there as well and any grammar errors you might be making will be erased by those speaking it more fluently around your child. Go for it. But be aware that bilingual children often take longer to start speaking, particularly the boys. My son didn't speak in proper sentences until three, and not in his second language (my language) until four. My daughter started speaking her mother tongue sentences at a little after 2 and hasn't yet started saying much in my language (just 3 so another year should do it).

One method is for each parent to speak their own mother tongue yes. The other method is to have a 'home' language which is the one that isn't dominant. So you speak your second language at home (all of you if you can), and the baby picks up the dominant language outside of the house.