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If you asked your friends to set you up and they said 'they couldn't think of anyone'...

22 replies

FairStretchInTheEvenings · 17/10/2019 18:21

Does that mean

a) all the decent men are truly coupled up

or

b) you're too odd to be compatible with anyone?

OP posts:
Youreterriblemuriel99 · 17/10/2019 18:23

All the decent men THEY know are coupled up. Don’t take it personally 🙂

FairStretchInTheEvenings · 17/10/2019 18:25

It took a lot of courage to ask so I'm feeling a bit down, tbh.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 17/10/2019 18:27

I would say that simply because I wouldn’t want to get involved in someone’s relationship like that especially if you know both parties because of the potential to be awkward

Aposterhasnoname · 17/10/2019 18:28

I don’t know any single blokes, and neither does DH, so if you asked me I couldn’t help either.

toomuchfaster · 17/10/2019 18:30

I don't know any single men atm, but a few single women. So you could take it at face value; they don't know any single men. Or you could take it to mean; I don't know any single man worthy of you.
Neither of these interpretations mean you are odd or all the nice, single men in your vicinity are coupled up.

Luaa · 17/10/2019 18:30

If someone asked me to set them up I'd probably say this as I know 2 single men and 2 single women. Done of them are somewhat difficult. I would only set them up with someone if I really really thought they'd suit each other long term.

ShirleyPhallus · 17/10/2019 18:33

I don’t know any single guys and if I did and didn’t set you up it would be because you’re not compatible

Imagine how upset you’d be if a friend set you up with some guy who was utterly repulsive to you and shared none of your interests - you’d be much more upset than if they hadn’t bothered!

FairStretchInTheEvenings · 17/10/2019 18:33

The thing is, they're always going on at me for being single, so I though they were the ones to ask.

OP posts:
Ambidexte · 17/10/2019 18:39

I would have to say the same if anyone asked me.

With the best will in the world, I don't actually know any single men. Well, technically I do, but all of them are either gay or a bit weird in some way, apart from one who is 96 and probably not what you are looking for.

So I would guess it's really not you. You don't mention how old you are or how old your friends are, but if they're coupled up and in their 30s or 40s then I would say from my experience that they probably socialise largely with other couples and genuinely don't have a bank of eligible single men to recommend.

Camomila · 17/10/2019 18:49

a) DH and I are only 31 but we only know 2 decent single men, everyone else is married/in a long term relationship

  1. is my brother who all my single friends have met.
  2. is a stereotypical home counties banker (DHs uni friend) and all my friends are hippy charity worker/nhs worker types and vegans - I don't think they'd suit eachother much.
JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 17/10/2019 18:52

Well if you asked me to set you up id say no- because I don’t know any eligible bachelors. If I did- id be setting myself up with them Grin

Bluntness100 · 17/10/2019 18:55

Very hard for folks to know someone and most wont want to get involved in this because of the risk of it going wrong in some way, plus blind dates are not most people's cup of tea.

Loopytiles · 17/10/2019 18:55

Them commenting on your personal life is rude!

They may genuinely not know many single men, have reasons not to recommend some, and/or not want to play matchmaker, as it can be awkward!

BuildBuildings · 17/10/2019 18:56

I don't know loads of people. I'm in my early 30s so lots of friends and family are in couples. I'd struggle to think of a single friend. Nevermind a suitable one. So I don't think it's you. Probably just similarly don't know anyone.

katmarie · 17/10/2019 18:57

I know one single guy and I wouldn't wish him on any of my friends, so I wouldn't take it personally if I were you! Have you tried online dating? It's not for everyone, I know, but I met my husband that way, so it can work out.

BuildBuildings · 17/10/2019 18:58

Also it's mega rude for anyone especially a 'friend' to comment on your personal life.

HalyardHitch · 17/10/2019 18:59

I have a friend who is into travelling and has a dog. Two people I know who are single - one doesn't travel because he is a carer for his mum and is scared of dogs. The other has a child so wouldn't interest her either. They are amazing men but not compatible with my friend

FairStretchInTheEvenings · 17/10/2019 18:59

Hopefully they now stop commenting!

Thanks everyone.

OP posts:
Picklypickles · 17/10/2019 19:01

I wouldn't take it personally! A friend of oh's asked if I had any friends I could set him up with but they are all married or in long term relationships and have children!

FionaOgre · 17/10/2019 19:05

Well I don't know any single blokes sooo... well one but he wouldn't ever get set up.

Apolloanddaphne · 17/10/2019 19:06

I don't know any single men so couldn't help you!

You are never too old to be coupled up though. A relative of mine who has never, as far as i am aware, been in a relationship has recently met a man and is very happy. She is in her 60s.

kenandbarbie · 17/10/2019 19:16

Maybe they don't know any single men, I'd struggle for men my own age, they're all married!

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