What do you do with your young toddler at the weekend?

[LisaSimpsonsbff]

DS is 15 months. DH and I are both find it really hard work to have a whole day just at home with him - he gets whingey, we get bored. He will play with his toys for a while, and he loves being read to, but neither of those can possibly fill a morning, let alone a whole day! We've tried things like playing with finger paint and he is interested in it for approximately 10% of the time it takes to set them up and clean up afterwards. It's been pissing it down all weekend here - yesterday I took him to the park (in a puddle suit) and it was deserted, and this morning we went to soft play and it was us and two single dads, which obviously is fine but clearly this isn't what 'most' families are doing on a Sunday morning. You also mostly seem to see older toddlers at this stuff, so most people must not feel the need for it to entertain a 'young' (say, under 2) toddler? Are other people having whole days in and we're somehow missing some trick that makes that not awful? Or are they going somewhere we haven't thought of? Should we just let DS get more bored - are we trying too hard to keep him constantly entertained?

What would you like to spend the afternoon doing?

Actually, maybe this is the nub of the issue. Before DS I used to work crazy hours and so would spend at least half the weekend working and the rest of it out with friends - I've now changed jobs so I don't work outside 9-5 Mon-Fri and I go out with friends every now and again but I don't like going out without DS very often as I'm at work all week. So maybe actually the issue is as much that I don't know what to do with myself as that I don't know what to do with DS! Him and DH have gone out to play in puddles now, anyway!

I also needed to go to b and q so she sat in the trolley, I can’t spent my hard earned weekends entertaining dd alllll the time!!!

See I think I feel the exact opposite - I'm very happy to spend the weekend doing kid stuff, I just don't quite know what to do, but the idea of spending it going around shops makes me want to cry! DS actually loves the supermarket but I do all my shopping online because I hate it so! Horses for courses...

He is now busily taking all of my sorted laundry out of the laundry basket.

I see someone above said "I wish they would entertain themselves longer then 9 minutes without needing food, drinks, books or making a fucking mess."

I can't remember what DS1 was like at this age now - but I do just let mine make a mess. Maybe that's the key? It's never that much of a big deal - when he's finshed strewing the clothing around that he's currently doing, I'll just pick it all up in a big lump and dump it back into the washing basket. I've already sorted and separated it so the stuff that was in that basket is all the stuff to go into our bedroom anyway and it wasn't neatly folded. In fact he's now even putting it back himself (not that I have any expectation that will be completed or useful - he will put one thing in and out for about 5 minutes and then wander off.)

I try to entertain as little as possible.

Yesterday, I had an appointment so DH and DS (2) stayed in and built a train track. Then after lunch we visited a friend with a similar aged son so they played together.

This morning DS has played with jigsaws, books and diggers. This afternoon, I have put Shrek on (mostly for myself, DS doesnt seem interested) while DS is playing trains and doing something with post it notes. DH is finishing some decorating.

I have just bought him a waterproof outfit though as I would have preferred some outdoor time. DS still is in the phase where he can instinctively find every bit of dog shit and barbed wire rather than acorns and conkers though. I may try baking with him again but it tends to cause a scale up as he doesn't grasp the 'now we have to wait for them to cook' bit and we have a lovely performance.

Saturdays in the month: Museum, soft play, aquarium, swimming, science centre.

Every Sunday : church then soft play most m and long woodland walk with the dog.

and then repeat the next month and the next month and the next month 😂 we are a bit bored of it but DS loves it every time and I love seeing how much more he can do at each place the next month

I do find he gets more whiny if we try to spend long periods sat at our computers. He is happier being around us when we are doing a mixture of things, so weekends for us are a little bit sat down on computers, a bit of playing together, a bit of taking turns to have naps, a bit of cleaning around him. On Saturdays we go food shopping and we will sometimes do one other thing at the weekend - last weekend we met friends in a local child-friendly restaurant and he had a brilliant time exploring the buffet and then the play area (but this kind of thing is much easier to do in Germany.)

@LisaSimpsonsbff I struggled when I first had kids too, adjusting from having 5 million things to do at the weekend and then feeling like I should be singing nursery rhymes (which like you I’ve never understood how that can be made into an ‘activity’!)

They do get more interesting soon. For now though I’d suggest trying to find some things that you and your husband would enjoy that your toddler would be happy enough to go along with - we’ve got a science centre near us (Winchester) which is fun, the arcade, garden centre for lunch (ours has a very little soft play).

I did painting and things like that a few times when my first was that little but it’s more effort than it’s worth.

With 1 child- especially if you work, the weekends are for spending with your child imo- I feel crap enough being at work all wk, so I like to do “fun” things.
(IMo: I will say I think a museum with most young toddlers is Impossible)
Is it easier to advocate “let them entertain themselves” with more than 1DC so essentially they entertain each other?!

When ours were smaller we did the following--

-stuff we wanted to do like exhibitions or seeing friends
-trip to a new park then pub or lunch while they napped
-do stuff separately ie one of us sees a friend or does some exercise while the other one does whatever
-swimming
-train to the countryside for a long walk with toddler in sling or robust buggy
-the kids bit in all the central London museums
-errands
-trip to allotment or local city farm

We hate staying in but ours both napped until 3 which meant you could fit a mini date in as well while they snoozed. We also live in London which helps as there is always something on.

I had a big list of things.

So big days out.
A castle,
A pretty village and lunch
A theme park /safari Park
Ride on a steam train
National Trust type place. Etc.

Normal days out.
Farm Park
Swimming and lunch
The bigger country park and a long walk
The library
Kids cinema screenings

Soft play etc

One offs
Like a country fair,
The fire station open day
The farmers market
A hot air balloon thing
An exhibition

Planned things
Theatre ( a local arts centre does great stuff for kids)
A meet up with friends
Basically anything you book or buy tickets for in advance

And then home activities.
I'd bake and get them to help. At that age that really means letting them have a bowl full of stuff to stir and add milk too.
Play doh
Toys
We started watching the pixar shirts at that age in readiness for movies
Reading
A bath for fun
Soapndrawing on the windows
Pavement chalk on the patio
And so on.

And make a little loose plan the week before otherwise I found I could spend a couple of weekends on the trot not having done very much and feeling a bit crap! Although I do like the odd weekend of not doing very much too.

You need to find a local FB group or even Netmums :o - They will have suggestions of local attractions. I would also look on tripadvisor - sounds weird, but works.

But essentially I would make a list of the following within 30 mins walk/drive:
Parks
Swimming pools
Pet shops/garden centres with fish, birds, small animals
Soft play centres
Pub with beer garden/indoor play area
Libraries

Within an hour's drive:
Museums/galleries with kid friendly stuff
Woods/fields with animals/hills/other interesting outdoor area
Bigger/more interesting play areas, swimming pools
Children's/visitable farm parks
National Trust type places
Ruins, castles and so on
Ikea (kids love running around in there, and the cafe is cheap)

And then for rarer things, within 2 hours' drive:
Aquariums/zoos
Really special museums
Beaches (unless you're close to the coast and have loads, in which case put them in one of the other categories)
Amusement parks (may be better after age 2, or in a group so you can alternate childcare/rides)

Also family/friends you'd like to visit, invite over, or meet somewhere halfway and their relative distance.

Obviously these also vary in cost as well as distance but we essentially have a list of stuff we can do often, and stuff we do more rarely, that we developed for DS1 and we are refining for stuff they can both do.

Find out where local(ish) events are often advertised near you, too - local paper, facebook, etc.e

Ooh I've just remembered I have this really good book called The Toddler's Busy Book. It has lots of ideas for activities to do at home and not. Some of them are too old for DS2 right now but plenty of them are good.

Also, rotate toys! If you present them with a big box of the same toys every day they will be bored with them very quickly. Put the big box somewhere inaccessible, and give them a smaller box (or better, several small baskets) containing a much smaller selection of toys. About every 6-8 weeks, get the big box out, put some or all of the small selection away and change it for different toys. This way you can easily take out things they've become too old for as well.

It is a hard age and you are still totally at that adjustment stage - you can’t do weekends as you used to without a child, or with only a non-mobile baby, any more. It does get easier!

I think some people with older children, or more than one child, have forgotten quite what it’s like. My DC2 is now 19 months so as a developmental stage I remember it well (basically they want someone to engage quite intensively but they don’t really follow instructions ) but it’s v different with two, you do just leave them to it in a way which would would be a bit weird with only one child IMO.

I am definitely not doing any baking, painting, crafting or playdough yet... just too much hassle and they don't really know that they're "doing an activity". That's more 2.5 onwards really.

Museums - seems to depend on the museum really. There is a nice one near us which has an aquarium bit that DS2 likes but yeah most of it is lost on him. Then there is a science museum type place a bit further away which he can do some things in - press buttons, look at lights etc.

Sometimes big toy shops will have things like bins of duplo, wooden trains set up etc. ELC used to be brilliant for this.

Worth noting, if you are at a loose end at weekends and you have any friends who are single parents who have their kids with them at weekends, they often appreciate an invitation to do stuff as most people keep weekends as "family time" and they can be quite lonely and long. At least that was my experience.

Definitely agree with PP about it might be easier to leave them to get on with it when you have more than 1. DD just loves company and someone to play with- she doesn’t care if it is me, a friend or her cousins, but she likes to interact when she plays.

We would often take turns at doing something with DS, no point both parents trailing round a soft play (unless you like that sort of thing!). At least that way one adult could do something they enjoyed .
Endless walks, swimming, church (good crèche!), meeting friends - you tend to assume that everyone else is having lovely 'family time' but I often found friends were happy to meet up for a coffee. We had an annual pass to a zoo which helped & National Trust membership. Very important to rotate toys, I never had loads of toys out, partly because I can't stand the mess and too much choice can be overwhelming.

DD is 2, DS is 5. We are out of the house most weekends by 8 am as the kids are rampant by then.

This weekend we've :

Been to an open house at a fireststion
Been to the park
Been to the supermarket
Taken the kids swimming
Played in the garden

DS is currently at a birthday party, I'm chilling outside with a coffee whilst DD naps.

We'll go pick DS up, come home and chill for a bit then go play in the garden, or another park visit 🙄

Tomorrow is apple picking.

I occasionally bake with DS - but absolutely no crafts at all. Too much mess. We have colouring books etc, but no glitter at all.

When mine were toddlers they quite enjoyed a trip to pets at home to look at the animals, or the garden centre to look at the fish. We often went into town (or the next town over) and wandered round the shops, sometimes it’s just the change of scenery that’s nice. When you have older and younger dc you’re often at activities for the big ones, and the little ones just come along for the ride. I did read a blog post where rather than having all the toys accessible, the mum rotated them on a regular basis, so every week or two the toys were “new” and there’s a thought that too many is overwhelming anyway and they don’t play so well.
I do remember some wet Sunday afternoons though where I was just praying for Monday and routine and playgroup!

@DonPablo that's a really good list, I'm going to compile similar.

I have an annual pass for the zoo and DS is free but really should get DH one as its a great place to go as DS loves animals.

I think part of the problem is I need a plan of action or else DH and I start debating what we should do at 9am and DS is already kicking off at wanting to go out.

We rotate toys, and I hide birthday and Christmas toys to bring out a few months later to mix it up.

We have EXACTLY.the same dilemma. I dont know how people just get on with their normal tasks. Sometimes I can just about cook dinner but DS is usually somewhere he wouldn't be within 2 minutes of me leaving him. He is also still napping twice a day and is quite difficult with naps - one false move and he wakes up.
This weekend we have:
Gone to a softplay in the morning then shopping in the afternoon ( made the drive longer for his lunchtime nap). I couldn't look at anything I wanted to because we needed shoes for him.and it took longer than planned.

Today: DH went to church (once DS drops morning nap we will join him again but I have no chance of him sleeping through church anymore), quick visit to the swings before lunch then a good hour and a half walk this afternoon.

We have a just turned 2 year old and there's no way we could manage a whole day inside ever, let alone the weekends.
We do a lot of the following:
Park visits (rain or shine)
Zoo/aquarium visits (we have an annual pass to our local ones so this is free for us)
Walks in the woods
Going on the bus (not to a destination - joy just going on the bus. Lol)
Visiting the beach - rain or shine (we live by the coast so we're lucky)
Visiting country parks and playing football
Soft play
Swimming
Taking her scooter out
Popping to the shops
Visiting grandparents/aunties
Going to local farms
Chalk drawing in the garden/outside somewhere
Washing the car
Dinner/lunch somewhere child friendly
I'm due to go on maternity leave again in March so we're trying to look after the pennies at the minute so the more expensive options are not possible anymore. We've found this has made us more resourceful than ever. Lol

I struggle with this too- a 15 month old and a DH who is an 'indoor person'. He has no interest in going anywhere or doing anything at the weekend, and is perfectly happy staying in with tv on all day. So at most we got to the local park which takes up an hour. Other than that I'm mostly playing with her on the floor for the other 10 hours, or taking her somewhere myself (walks, visit friends, softplay, cafes).

we don't do anything.

My 17 month old and nearly 3 year old are shattered from 5 days of activities/childcare (I work 3 days and spend the other two weekdays guilt parenting).

We live in a touristy area so weekends are a nightmare so we tend not to venture out unless we have to.

Saturday I spend cleaning whilst the children play/whinge/nap

DH works 6.5 days a week and Sunday afternoon is his only time off (unless something crops up, which it often does), so we might visit relatives or go for a walk or something depending on the weather. But basically the weekends are the only days we get to just not do stuff unless we want to. It doesn't do children any harm to be bored occasionally.

The key for us is to take turns. I spend 2 hours with my DC then my husband then back to me,et. A 2 hour activity could be anything mentioned above.

We as a couple still have time together during naps and after 7pm.