Can you give me some career advice please?

[Stuckinarut81]

I am 38 and really need a career of some kind, any suggestions are very welcome.

Basic history:

1. did well at school, but was naughty and dropped out of A levels. Did crappy office work from 18-23, at which point I had dd1.

1. When dd1 was one, I started my own business buying and selling online, which I still do now. Has been successful enough to keep the wolf from the door but it’s never going to earn me a fortune.

1. Had dd2 at 29, with a different guy who turned out to be an actual psychopath and put me and the dc through hell. Carried on with my online business as well as I could.

1. Had to relocate age 31 because we were in danger of said psychopath. Life was taken up with being too scared to sleep, court hearings, and writing a book about what he put us through.

1. Started an access course at 32, got a distinction and a place at uni to study social work. Completed first year of uni and decided I really didn’t want to be a social worker, and changed course to social sciences. I was still suffering badly with my MH after psycho experience, and my eldest daughter was having difficulties at school. I just didn’t feel I was in a good place to take on other people’s problems in a stressful role.

1. Had book published and it got to number 11 on the Times bestseller list.

1. Graduated with a first class degree. During my last year at uni, dd1 had been school refusing a lot because she has ASD and couldn’t cope with it.

1. Shortly after I graduated in 2017, dd1 left school and I spent the next 18 months home educating her and applying for an EHCP. She got this over the summer and has started this term at an autism unit, still only part time at the moment.

So at the moment, I’m still doing my online business, also managing an Airbnb property and any other bits of work as they come along. But I’m worried that I don’t have a career, a pension or the mental stimulation that I’m looking for.

I may be jumping the gun, as currently dd2 is only 9, and although technically she could walk to and from school, I don’t want her to yet as she has already been kidnapped once by her psycho father. But maybe in a year or so she’ll be able to. So at the moment I still have to be there for school runs.

I’m wondering whether to go back to education and do a masters, although if I did that I’d want it to lead to a definite profession, something my current degree is lacking! Or maybe I could do some part time work or volunteering with a view to getting a job in a particular field, if only I knew what that was!

I like animals and social justice if that’s any help . Things I’ve been considering are working for a housing association (maybe a housing officer), talking therapies and property. But really I have no clue. Once I’ve made my mind up about something I’m very motivated and I make it happen. I just need to settle on something and go for it, but that’s the bit I’m struggling with.

Also I live in quite a rural area which doesn’t have masses of opportunities, but after everything we’ve been through there’s no way I’m uprooting the kids now that we are settled here and have a support network.

What can I be when I grow up, wise mumsnetters?

so your strength seems to be writing & running a business. would something like blogging / online agony aunt suit you? i'm sure it is very hard to break into that, but it could work. i'm thinking something like www.askamanager.org/ but for a different topic.

other stop-gap jobs could include tutoring online

for a real job, you could look at the various options based on psychology - maybe counselling or educational? the BPS has a good guide to the various qualifications that you need here
careers.bps.org.uk/

6. Had book published and it got to number 11 on the Times bestseller list

Was it a novel? Can you write another? You already have an audience for one book and you could convert them to book 2 (and 3 and 4). What does your publisher think?

Sges been kidnapped?! id be relocating even moving country.

@PaperFlowers4 the book was about her experience with her abusive ex!

So, for a number of reasons it sounds like you're going to need quite a high level of autonomy (you are very used to managing and succeeding on your own) and flexibility (lone parent to 2 quite young children, one who may continue to need you quite intensely). From that I would rule out things where you're part of large, highly structured organisations - with the possible exception of the NHS who can sometimes be good about term time only contracts etc.

I would consider whether you want to get into anything where people depend on you alone (such as counselling etc) because it can be very stressful if you often need to re-schedule clients if your children need you. Are there any people you might consider a joint venture with, to spread the load?

It may be that you need a "portfolio" approach - a majority interest that gives you financial stability and pension etc, topped up with smaller income streams that satisfy interests / passions? So - copywriting, technical writing (can be good in specialist fields), small business advisor? Professional fundraiser? Are there skills specific to particular animals you could develop, e.g.dog training? What parts of social justice get you fired up - a particular charity, acting as an individual advocate or peer supporter, campaigning?

Get a copy of what Color is your parachute. Some great stuff in it about identifying your skills and roles that match them.

Maybe grant writing if you're a strong writer? Once you have a bit of experience you can do it freelance very easily although you would need to learn first- maybe a part time trust fundraising job with a local charity. There's a good trustfundraising group on Facebook--the bigger money is with technical writing on large tenders but you'd need to build up to that as it's a very specific skill set.

My daughter was kidnapped before we lived here and before I had court orders in place, so in theory we’re safer now but I don’t want to take any chances.

@FlatheadScrewdriver thank you, some good suggestions. You’re absolutely right that I need autonomy after so long of doing my own thing (I also have ASD which is another element making it hard to work for other people). I have actually thought about being a dog trainer or behaviour specialist or something, but it’s been nothing more than a thought so far. And wrt social justice - things that get me fired up are the societal attitudes towards single mothers, the difficulties of moving away from welfare (particularly for single parents in rural areas, this is what I wrote my dissertation on), the brutality of austerity and the inadequacies of the welfare state. Also domestic abuse and disabilities are topics close to my heart!

@Zone4 I will look into grant writing, thank you.

Oh, and to the person who suggested tutoring, I forgot to add that to my OP. I’ve done a bit of tutoring locally for A level sociology students and really enjoyed it. I don’t think I’d want to teach a whole class though, all the teachers I know are so stressed.