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Can't get this out of my head, upsetting

2 replies

confusedofengland · 07/10/2019 12:29

I was just in Aldi doing my weekly shop. It was fairly busy, but not as busy as it can get.

There was a lady & a man (maybe 50-60) with, I think, Down's Syndrome doing their shopping, with a carer (I assume, but I suppose could have been niece or similar). The lady got distressed on a couple of occasions that I saw, crying & saying she wanted to go home. The carer was busy helping the man & on the first occasion snapped at the lady 'Sit down (on her walking frame with seat) & stop your moaning'. I think I heard her exclaiming 'For God's sake' but I couldn't be sure. On the second occasion, there were more people around & she was a bit nicer, but still seemed quite unsympathetic & just told the lady to wait there until she got there.

On the first occasion, the lady did stop being upset & was occupied picking up items of shopping. On the second occasion she sat & cried for a while & an Aldi worker was working where she was & was talking to her & comforting her. I was prepared to stand with her until the carer got back but didn't as she had that company & I didn't want to crowd her, especially if she may get upset with strange faces. I hung around when I had paid but couldn't see them any more.

I know it must be a really tough job to do & I have the utmost respect for carers, I can imagine maybe the carer had had a tough morning & was at the end of her tether Sad

It's played on my mind a lot this morning as we've had an incident with MIL, who has dementia & also my DS has autism & I'm always aware he may need carers in the future. I can't help wondering if I could/should have done more, or if this is what MIL/DS may feel like/experience on some level?

OP posts:
Mummybares · 07/10/2019 20:55

Done what?! Its hard work and i doubt shes a carer if shes out with 2 people needing care. For gods sake and stop moanibg isbt abusive. Care work is horrible. Its so hard so unrewarding not paid anywhere near enough and people are so incredibally challenging. Your best bet is to save up for your son.
Its one of my fears relying on carers as ive seen itfirst hand.
Again she may not have even been their carer! and you dont know the whole story.maybe the woman is a horrible moaner...
Being disabled doesnt mean you are kind sweet and angelic

Bouffalant · 07/10/2019 21:01

Very sad. But being a carer is a horrendously underpaid job that not many people want to do if they have other options. A lot of people that are doing it would prefer not to be and are not cut out for it.

My DM worked with carers in SS for many years and found it so difficult.

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