Experience of a child not dry at night at 7yo

[BeyondAvoidant]

Just waiting for our referral to the specialist and have been told to try him without pull ups.

I'm curious how many people this strategy works for, given I know the two main reasons for late wetness are either lack of vasopressin or very deep sleep - neither of which seem to be affected by the alleged "feeling wet" (which is more what I'd associate with younger potty training. If that makes sense?)

I know it's never physically easy for anyone to let their child wet the bed night after night to see if it makes a difference, but especially so for me - he is in a king size bed and I'm physically disabled, plus he suffers from eczema which I'm sure will flare up if he is left in urine :(

@BeyondAvoidant I had some issues with bed wetting when my son was this age and a little older, wasn't every night but at least once a week. Our gp referred up to the school nurse ( not actually in school) who had load of experience. We met her once and she gave us a plan for bladder retraining. This involved a set number of 200ml (i think) drinks to be had at certain points of the day to make your child get used to feeling full, this then triggers the brain and they go to the toilet. ( we didn't have an issue during the day, only night). Within a week or two the issue had gone away. I had to involve the school discretely as he needed to drink during class time but it did work. There are also certain types of drinks that irritate the bladder so they need to be avoided. I don't think I kept any of the material but would recommend getting a number for the school nurse as they will be able to advise.

We are the same - my ds is 7 and not dry at night yet. We are trying him without pull ups and out of the last 10 nights he's had about 4 dry.
We've tried the alarm, lifting, restricting fluids, double wee before bed etc. We are under the HV and will try the alarm in half term again but after that I want a referral. I work ft so having to strip his bed etc every morning is starting to take its toll.
I'm not putting him back in pull-ups though as I do think it enables him to wet. But I am sick of the washing !

We went via the school nurse - the doctor said they had to do all referrals.

He drinks loads of water and pees often and tiny amounts through the day, he's been dry in the day since he was 2! He very very rarely has squash as I know the sweeteners can irritate the bladder. He doesn't drink in the hour before bed and always wees before.

Our GP told us there are 3 windows in childhood where the right hormones kick in to trigger the child to wake if needs the loo. I think this was roughly 3-4 years, 7-8 years and 11-12 years. Our DS carried on until almost 12. He had tablets to suppress urine production plus wore pull up type psnts for residential trips and sleepovers. I had to secretly give the teachers spare sleeping bags and mattress protectors.

We tried increasing the water intake at home and school to 7-8 glasses a day but it didn't seem to make a difference. Sometimes waking him and toileting at 11pm or midnight seemed to help, other times not.

We just had years of stripping and remaking the bed in the early hours. He was only in a single bed but the washing machine was always on. Waterproof mattress protectors and spare sheets etc are a lot cheaper for a single bed though.

This was all a decade ago and looking back seems much less off a big deal now than at the time. In your position today, I would use the dry night type pants/pull ups every night to save your back/save the washing, with a mattress protector for any leaks, and try to to worry too much. Accepting that it is not in their control, just something to manage until they get to the next 'window' takes the pressure off them a bit too. Good luck

Should say that he could only have the tablets to suppress urine production for sleepovers or residentials. Not recommended or prescribed routinely.

Following with interest. Seven and half, frequently leaks out of the pull up, and has never had a dry night.

Contacted GP recently, they didn’t have an appointment but receptionist took details and in return from
GP we got a printed off leaflet from the Internet (might even have been nhs choices) of things to try [duh, like we might have done that already] and a sample pot to rule out infection.

The only thing we’ve not done is an alarm.

I have got him stripping his own bed now.

We did the tablets to suppress urine for my 7 year old. Barely worked at all, still wet his pull ups most nights.

After 3 months pediatrician reluctantly said to use the alarm.

That was amazing! Took nearly 3 months to reach the magic 14 nights in a row without wetting but it really worked. At home he just wore pants with the alarm. But on holiday we put a pull up over his pants just incase (as we couldn't easily wash and dry the sheets).

Its beens months now since he had an accident. Bloody fantastic.

Tip - three sheets on the bed - put bed mat/sheet/bed mat/ sheet/ bed mat/ sheet. Then whip off the top one if bed wet and voila a new one is there underneath.

1. Alarm. Rodger is a good one - worked for DS1 at 7, hasn't worked for DS2 who is now 10. Try for about 3 weeks and if no success stop!

2. "Try him without nightpants" will only work if it's the lack of wetness feeling causing the problem. May be worth a try.

3. Drink "correct" amount of water during the day - like 1.5l (teachers are getting a bit annoyed with this one!) it's to try to stretch the bladder a bit and give it more capacity. Child is also meant to wait for the feeling of needing to wee then wait some more then go.

4. Not drinking after (say) 6pm. Difficult one in our house as DS forgets to drink during the day then gets a headache at about 7 and needs to glug water (sigh!). If we are pying attention, 1.5l at school, small glass of water with tea then nothing.

5. Desmospressin - seems to work, but at the heart of this you have to accept that if they are not ready they are not ready, useful for school trips, try it out first so you understand how it works! DS2 is now on Desmospressin at 10 yo and he is getting there with it, he's come off it but is still hit and miss.

He doesn't have a diagnosis himself, but I have asd and he has a lot of "my" traits. He didn't speak at all until about 2.5. The person we spoke to on the phone brushed that off though, after asking what his health was like in general. personally I'd say that's relevant, but hey ho...

Also there is a link between my disability (I have EDS - which is also inherited dominantly btw, so it's certainly possible he is affected) and interstitial cystitis. He has enough traits of EDS for the geneticist to make a note of it at the time, but without being in pain (which he very rarely notices anyway. Possible asd trait there for eg) he doesn't quite meet the criteria for his own diagnosis. So again she wasn't interested in that either.

I avoid HCPs as much as humanly possible - I've had a lot of bad experience.

(with the alarm when I say try for 3 weeks and if no success stop, I do mean if you are getting intermittent success keep going.... but if night in night out wet bed then stop)

We had this and what worked was the alarm. We also tried the pills but they didn't work. The alarm worked almost straightaway though.

Hang on in there - it's a tough time!

Also following for some tips. DS is 7, nearly 8. We've tried everything listed on this thread except for alarms. For some reason, it just doesn't wake him up and then he ends up lying in it for hours, oblivious.

For this reason, and because we work full time so the washing becomes unmanageable, we're just sticking with pull ups.

I was wondering if it was time to take him to the drs but maybe not after seeing responses here.

With the alarm DH and I took it in turns to sleep with DS (mattresses on the floor) so when the alarm went off we shook him awake (if he wasnt already) and made sure he was awake to finish in the loo/get changed.

As time went on, even if the alarm didnt wake him, he subconsciously stopped peeing once the alarm went off so only pants were wet, not pyjamas or sheets.

Again, we woke him and sent him to the toilet.

When he went back to school this September he had a couple of tiny accidents- once his brain realised he was peeing itd stop him and wake him, so again, no sheets to change only a tiny patch of pee on his pyjamas. Huge improvement (he used to regularly wet through pull ups)

I do layer up the bed with 3 sheets and mats too but this morning he had wet through them all including his duvet which had somehow got in the way, so quite often it's not as easy as just taking a sheet off - it's the whole lot ☹️

Do you reckon putting my washable pads on him would help? - in that he'd get the "wet" sensation he doesn't get with pull ups, but it would hopefully restrict how much got to the bedding? Or would the fact he has pads on mean it doesn't get "counted" as being put to bed with no safety net? 🤔

We had this with DS, visited enuresis clinic with similar guidance as KayJay and resolved it. DS was 8 at the time.

For us the biggest problem was that he didn’t drink enough in the daytime, plus the water bottle sipping doesn’t train their bladders. They need to drink a 200ml glass at a time.

We went to GP at 7 who just said same as above:

• more daytime drinks
• no blackcurrant squash
• wee just before getting ready for bed then wee just before getting into bed

But what really really worked was the alarm. We dragged his mattress into our room (or one if you could sleep on his floor - camping mattress / sofa cushions) as at first he needed help to wake up and also to change sheets.

I also bought a load of cheap PJs to make it easier but also to reward him for trying.

First week was like having a newborn again - up every 2/3 hours and soaking wet.

Next week we noticed a 22.30/23.00 pattern so started taking him to the loo when we went up. This gave us our first few dry nights.

By third week there was a regular run of dry nights and he moved back into his bedroom.

He's now been dry for 6 months no issues - even on holiday!!

Yes to Pp about sipping water bottle. I would make him down a couple of small cups in quick succession as part of breakfast and when he got back from school.

Dd went on meds at 6 (daytime wetting too) and finally was dry at 8. It's not that uncommon. We had to get her to use the toilet (she was too heavy for me to lift) right up until 10 otherwise she would have an accident.

My DS is 6 nearly 7. He still wears nappies or pull ups and these are always wet in the morning. Interestingly there have been a few occasions recently when we've been away and forgotten/run out of nappies. I've told him to try really hard not to wet the bed and he's woken up completely dry. I do wonder if the nappies are counterproductive - he knows he's safe to wee when wearing them.

We used reusable pants from 8 too at the suggestion of the nurse specialist, I used cloth nappies but she had outgrown the normal training pants, they provided me with 5 pairs on prescription.

Yes worked for us. We had one meeting at bed wetting clinic and were put on waiting list for bed alarm.

Took him out of pull ups and in 12 or so weeks we were waiting for alarm, he went dry. Started every second night dry - then most nights - to one a week wet and then v occasional accident.

I think it was total placebo affect of appointment, he listened to nurse, believed he could and so he did. He doesn't properly wake to use loo in night, he kind of sleepwalks. so in strange places you have to catch him before he wees in the corner!

Have you looked at the Eric website?

For my son he had to keep a record of volume of drinks drunk and urine produced (using a jug to record).

Main advice was to drink larger volumes to increase the bladder size and trigger a greater response. He had to wait until bladder felt really full before going.

Sounds like this might be the case if your child is going to the loo a lot. They maybe need to drink more at a time and pee less often.

We were seen at a clinic and I guess the advice depends on the cause.

I would stay using pull ups tho until you are actively doing something different.

Yeah I've read the Eric website. We're gonna have a go at the water in vs water out chart in half term. He does drink large amounts in one go rather than sip often, he is constantly thirsty. His elder brother is the bugger who won't drink enough! But he's always done tiny wees often, cries that it hurts if we tried to get him to wait a bit. To the point that he's been checked yet the drs for UTIs a few times

Taking out of pull ups and then dry in two weeks could sound causal, but 12 weeks sounds like coincidence to me. Obviously if you wait long enough most children will be dry eventually.