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Original poster

Im so lonely

36 replies

Potnoodledoo · 27/09/2019 11:57

Just that.I need friends.I need time out.Im just so sad,

I have tried to make friends.But im such a weirdo.Other people have long standing friendships.Im alright with them,but in wider groups i dont have a hope.

I need friends that i can go out with.

OP posts:
MikeUniformMike · 27/09/2019 11:59

bump

Rosere · 27/09/2019 12:01

Can you join a meetup group?

ImAShowPony · 27/09/2019 12:02

Hi- tell us a bit about your life and your situation. Do you work? Are you able to get out and meet people? Though I know some people are surrounded by others and still lonely if they can't make a good connection.

BigSexyCrimeUnit · 27/09/2019 12:05

I'm so sorry to hear this OP, I'm sure you're not too weird, there are always people out there who will share your interests etc. You just need to find them. What I've always found is if I am feeling very negative I don't attract other people, it seems to repel people because life can be hard and they are worried they are going to be made to feel negative too. When you are more positive and find things that you enjoy doing even if you do them on your own you will automatically attract people who will be drawn to you.

Original poster
Potnoodledoo · 27/09/2019 12:06

Sahm,i like my own company.I dont mind going places alone.Just now and agan i would like to be able to call on people to go out.

Im an only child,so i dont even have siblings to turn too.

OP posts:
GeorgesMummy1 · 27/09/2019 12:08

Hi,

I am in a similar situation, seem to have lost all my close friends and it seems too late to get back in touch?

I am not on social media (and don't want to be!) so getting in touch with long lost friends would be difficult.

I would like some kind of app or website where I could look for people in the same area and situation that I am?

Has anyone heard of something like this?

eenymeenyminyme · 27/09/2019 12:12

I used to feel this way and found that joining clubs gets you out and about and you end up with new friendships. I can absolutely recommend parkrun for this and have heard great things about meetup groups.

I've gone from crying to myself at home to thinking 'where shall I go next?' - it's totally changed my attitude!

Good luck and get out there Smile

RuthW · 27/09/2019 12:14

Find a WI that meets your needs which isn't necessarily the nearest to you. Our members had a choice of 68 in the last year to go to. You do have to be over 18 though.

Usernamealreadyexists · 27/09/2019 12:33

Bumble, although used for dating, also has an option for searching for friends. Try that.

cacklingmags · 27/09/2019 12:38

OP. We are all fucking weird just some people hide it better. Perhaps try Meetup - there are many groups to choose from. Maybe find a book group or walking group. If you can't find one - start one. I am a huge introvert and weird as hell and have started two very successful social groups. Good luck - and don't give up.

ToddlerTwinsAndUnhinged · 27/09/2019 13:02

Where do you live?

JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 27/09/2019 13:08

What’s your daily routine?

Are you leaving the house every single day and being around people, even if not speaking to them? Get out to the park, for a walk, take DC swimming, mate eye contact and smile at people in Asda, Make chit chat with shop assistants, arrive for school pick up 10 minutes early and try and strike up a conversation, even if just to whinge about the weather. If there’s a parents WhatsApp, join it. Join the PTA. Volunteer for the reading partnership in school. Go to mum and baby groups. Chat to other parents at any clubs your dc attend. Offer to help out. Start an exercise class.

JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 27/09/2019 13:10

Volunteer: food bank, animal sanctuary, homeless charity, women’s charity etc.

confusedofengland · 27/09/2019 13:17

Just offering a word of support & some empathy.

I am also very lonely & seem to spend a lot of my time in tears at the moment. I am mainly a SAHM, but work/volunteer 2 mornings a week, so those days aren't so bad. But the days when I'm at home on my own for 6 hours, especially if DH is out in the evening (2-3 times per week atm)so I'm alone until gone midnight seem to last forever. I do have friends who I go out with, but that's only 1-2 times per month. Also I'm busy when my 3 DC are at home, it's just the days & evenings that really get to me.

fatulousatforty · 27/09/2019 13:23

Where about are you op?
What interests do you have?

PerfectPeony2 · 27/09/2019 13:25

How old are your children? If younger can you join some playgroups?

I have found being a Mum has been the best way to make friends.

How about a running club couch to 5k? Everyone is new when they join and if you’re shy you have the shared hobby to fall back on.

JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 27/09/2019 13:40

A local ladies running group has started a “mummy and me” running session. For mums and children from pram age right up to 18. You don’t even have to run. You can walk if you want. Might be something local near you?

Koshkaloca · 27/09/2019 13:42

Hello there 😁
I don't have friends, any acquaintance that always are busy, but it doesn't limit myself to go to the cinema, teather or do things alone and enjoy myself.
Of course, I would love to have someone to share with but is nobody.
Remember is a difference to be alone and to be lonely. I am both, but I try to make the best of it.
Find things you like to do or learn. Craft are amazing, it helps to meet people and is a kind of meditation too. And if you are lucky you can meet nice people too.
Create a routine, like go for a walk, I started every morning and I walk 10.000 steps it have make a good difference in my mind and waistline too 😅.
If you are in London maybe we can meet too.

A final note books are an amazing companion too

Jesse70 · 27/09/2019 13:45

Why do u class yourself as a weirdo? How old are your kids ? I've made a few friends through my toddler groups but to be honest I would never have bothered it's more for the kids than for me but we do meet for coffee and a chat at least once a week

Original poster
Potnoodledoo · 27/09/2019 14:32

@Jesse70 i have adult dc as well as smaller dc.Most people already have friends or family.Just feel people talk to me when teir other friends are not available

OP posts:
Jesse70 · 27/09/2019 14:40

There are website for meeting friends bit like a dating site u can see who has similar interests etc will be sure to have someone with the same situation as yourself maybe give it a go you have nothing to lose
If that's not your thing maybe you could join a club or class for yourself not kids to meet like minded people

Rosere · 27/09/2019 14:41

Get on a meetup group. Or join a class. I've moved a few times for universities and lived abroad and arrived in places not knowing a sinner. Joining activities and volunteering is all that kept me from going mad. It's also how I've made most of my friends.
Its the worst feeling being isolated but I can guarantee you're not actually alone. You're certainly not a weirdo.
I don't know which area you live in but even join a couch to 5k? Or a park run? I don't run but I helped out at the runs in Australia when I was there. Got me out and chatting to people, guaranteed a weekly coffee.

Boofybear1 · 27/09/2019 14:58

Ive never fit in. Cant do the fake ness and too upfront for most.

CleoMoon · 27/09/2019 15:10

I've always been a bit of an outcast! it doesn't help that I really don't know how to talk to people. I moved to a completely new area almost a year ago and have no friends at all here. I do enjoy my own company but it would be nice to have someone to talk to!

Whydomore · 27/09/2019 15:14

Someone close to me was like this and she got so down about it.
She then decided that fuck it, she may not have friends to do things with but she was doing them anyway (I thought she was so brave).
She has been on many solo holidays where everybody travels as a group and seen some truly amazing things, joined dance classes, fitness classes all sorts. Basically anything she wanted to do but always thought she needed someone to do it with. Through all this she as found a small group of friends (ages ranging from 30-50) who now go away together often to weird and wonderful places or just meet up for dinners and will book themselves onto anything they fancy.
Get out there, find something you want to do and go do it. You may find the type of friends you are looking for and hopefully enjoy yourself doing new things along the way.