Birthday party etiquette

[Boobahs]

My DS1 has just started school nursery and has come out today with his first party invitation, it's started already!!!

Could I please ask for any tips or hints about this stuff? Like what kind of presents do you get? We don't have a lot of spare money so if this is going to be a regular occurrence, I'd like to try to keep costs down somehow!

I will always reply to invitations either way as it's just rude not to!

Thanks in advance

Presents - just something that fits your budget that you think the child would like. My personal tip to mothers of boys (and probably the same applies in reverse) is don't assume little girls all like stuff from the 'pink aisle' iykwim. Some do, some don't. If you know a parent, you can ask if there's anything the kid is particularly into or not.

Cards can be stupidly expensive, so a multipack of kids cards with no age or suchlike can be a good idea. Similarly, a roll of generic birthday wrapping paper not gift bags etc.

I bought a paint it yourself piggy bank from Wilko and a book from The Works.

£5-8 is perfectly adequate, or less.
Craft is a good 'catch all'. (e.g. very simple kits). Look out for offers / sales in Sainsburys etc.

If you’re in the UK ‘the works’ does I think 20 cards for £1? All kiddie like designs so they’re good to get! They also do cheapish colouring books and reading books normally say 3/5 for around £10 which you can dish out at different parties. For reference I would never expect a school mum to turn up at anyone’s parties with an expensive gift, just a token would be more than enough and received gratefully as they know they don’t have to spend much at your child’s party too! X

Try not to worry or overthink this.

Generally speaking, it doesn’t need to be a big present, small presents are fine.

Have a max amount you’re willing to spend in mind and keep to that. There’s usually places where you can get cheaper or reduced price toys around.
You don’t know what the party child likes, so just buy something suitable for their age.

My DC have had all sorts as presents, from things as inexpensive as a pack of jelly babies upwards.

start collecting a hoard of presents in your budget when you see them. The budget can be as small as you like. You always spend more if you're on a time limit.

Get your kid to make a card.
Small gift, say a book up to £5.
Unlike adult parties, arrive on time, don't expect the adults to be fed or watered necessarily and leave promptly!

The works do a great selection of cards really cheap.

At that age I'd look to spend about £5, summer time it would be an outdoors gift, autumn/winter something like playdough, or stickers. I usually buy and stash gifts that are gender neutral craft/activity based when I see them on sale.

I aim for no more than £5 a present. I will often buy generic 'present pile' toys if I see suitable things reduced to under £5 in sales.
If my kids get suitable duplicate presents I will take one for the present pile.

Cards can be £2 if you have to grab one in supermarket at the last minute. Try to get a few at 20/30p from a cheap card shop and have them in. Or a multi-pack of generic ones as mentioned above.

Craft sets etc are good but avoid ones liable to be too messy. I had a parent apologise to me for an overcostly gift - she'd tasked her DH with buying some sort of crafty gift when DD was about 5, he'd bought an age 8+ potters wheel set.

Make sure reply ASAP

If you say you will go do go

£5 to £10 is fine - craft, small lego kits are all fine

Ask if they want you to drop and run or stay - don’t expect yourself to be fed or watered if you stay

Be in time and leave prompt.

My best tip for the time ahead of you where they get invited to loads of parties is buy some big sets of books from the book people. They usually work out at £1-£2 per book which are perfectly nice presents, especially if you don't know the child well enough to choose something they would like. Also buy 10 cards for £1 in Card factory or similar. Little kids are not remotely interested in the card. Don't feel you need to spend loads.

Little kids are not remotely interested in the card

No, other than they may like having large numbers of them to display which is why they shouldn't be omitted. Tape to the present so it serves as the gift tag.

If you're near the entertainer, they usually have decent toys well discounted. I aim to spend £5 but on something that looks like it's worth more.

Games are always a good idea as well, for both boys and girls. Home bargains normally have some reasonably priced ones. They also usually have some good branded toys as well.

We've also done small Lego sets, and stickers, books and crayons or similar.

Card factory do children's birthday cards for 29p.

We also regift duplicate toys that were given for birthday or Christmas.

Asda do books for £4, that and a few little toys or playdough for as little as £4 too. TK Maxx do great toys for under £10.

I go to the Works and buy 10 books for 10 quid, and split over a couple of birthdays. I don't know any of the nursery school kids to know what they like, what they have etc. so books seem a safe bet.

At the minute it's 10 books for £10 online at the works, I get a book and a bag of lollies or big bag haribo to go with a book, wrap them up and buy 10 cards for £1 from card factory and send one of those with it.

Thanks everyone! Great tips there. It's actually on Saturday afternoon and he's only been in nursery for 2.5 weeks so I don't even know who this child is!

I popped to Asda earlier and just brought a craft/sticker book pack and a cheap card but I'll stock up on those multipacks of books/toys/cards when I'm next in town.

I've already text a reply, it's a real annoyance of mine when people don't reply or turn up late but from reading Mumsnet, it seems like I need to get used to it in years to come!

As for kids not liking cards, both mine do! They spend time admiring /talking about the pictures. Animals with stupid expressions go down well.