To feel exhausted after family visits

[bubs80]

Anyone else feel exhausted after having family over for the day? I have a 7 month old baby and actually prefer it being us two or us and daddy. I find having to do dinner and talk to others all day exhausting while attending to baby and them just watching me feed etc and then just going up to baby saying hello and attempting to entertain them but not understanding baby needs naps etc . Just feel drained when they leave.

I felt exactly the same when my babies were that age. Did you cook for your visitors? If so, don't do it again until you feel properly back to normal energy levels and feeling on top of things. Your partner can do it, you can get a takeaway or meet in a cafe, restaurant or park.

@HelloCheeky I did a roast chicken dinner... my partner helped but was always painting a room at the time soo i pretty much cooked it all. It always feels like chaos when people are over as the routine seems to go out of the window.. even when baby naps they stay and im having to then talk for a good 2 hours when i would normally relax in that period. I will definitly meet at a cafe next time i think the difficulty is family one hour away so always seem to want to make a day of it but its too much.

I also feel under pressure from this certain person who visited who said to me at 6 weeks post baby " im surpised your not out running" as i used to run a lot before baby but i am so tired i dont feel like running . My back hurts my baby is 20 pound i carry him a lot he is teething and up during the night a lot to which both me and partner get up to him but i just feel like should i just be getting on with things making dinners tea etc or do i need to be kinder to myself

I remember that feeling well! I used to dread my in laws visiting because they were so loud, they’d wind DC1 up into a frenzy. She wouldn’t nap and we’d have to deal with the overtired fallout later. They’d also fight over holding her 🙄 It was exhausting.

It gets better the older your child gets, thankfully!

yes thats the same with us they are very loud and in your face and baby isnt used to it. I am quite quiet and calm with him and rarely do the over the top baby voice but they really lay it on thick and he ends up crying.. its too much. They also do the annoying thing of saying they are coming over and it doesnt matter if baby asleep as they just wanna see him awake or asleep.

My children are now 19 and 23 and I now look back on their babyhood and wonder why I put so much pressure on myself. The key to happiness is good relationships. Good relationships are built by people giving each other time and relaxed attention. You can't do this if you feel stressed and tired. I am sure that visitors won't care how much time you have devoted to preparing the food. They want to see you and the baby and have happy and relaxed chat.Being a successful parent means being happy with how things are in all their mess and imperfection. If visitors are sitting there thinking you should have put more effort into the catering then they don't have your best interests at heart and you should not worry about them. Also, your partner needs to know that he needs to be physically present when there are visitors.

I know this sounds bossy and patronising but it's what I wish I had done all through my DCs childhood and never did!