In my 40s, an introvert and at last culling my amount of acquaintances and feeling obliged to socialise!

[Petals23]

So I'm in my mid 40s and an introvert who needs a lot of time alone and down time. I used to be a people pleaser and attended social events because I felt I should. Over the last couple of years I've stopped making contact with people I wouldn't call friends, more acquaintances. I'm feeling more comfortable in my own skin now. I've also started doing things and attending events that I only really want to. I have been in an activity club for 10 years but lately feel my time in it has run its course. When I've been around people for a while I become exhausted and then need to hibernate for a while! Please tell me I'm not odd and that others feel like this also.

I only accepted my introvert status in the last couple of years (I’m late 30s). I realised I’m a sociable introvert, so while I like being around people, I really need time to myself to recharge. In more recent years I too have let friendships drift when I haven’t really found them positive for me. Did come back to haunt me recently when an old acquaintance I had dropped came into my work! Ended up agreeing to meet her for coffee soon (but I’ll see what she’s like because she can be quite sharp tongued, I will let it slide again if I have to!). It is a sense of relief to drop obligations.

Same age and had a lightbulb moment around the time I hit 40. I’m a social introvert and if I don’t want to go and socialise I just don’t do it anymore. I’ve also cut down greatly on the amount of time I spend visiting my lovely,but very loud and dramatic in-laws. At first my dh was angry, but I explained it isn’t personal (as such) for my own sanity I must have lots of down time. Wish I’d listened to my intuition years ago.

Me too. I'm a bit older, in my 50s. I've learned that I prefer to spend my time only with those I'm close to. I can't cope with socialising with lots of noisy extroverts and I need time alone like I need oxygen. It's such a relief not to have to force myself to be sociable any more.

I’m a social introvert too but as I get older the introvert seems to be winning 😂

Me too. I'm a bit older, in my 50s. I've learned that I prefer to spend my time only with those I'm close to. I can't cope with socialising with lots of noisy extroverts and I need time alone like I need oxygen. It's such a relief not to have to force myself to be sociable any more.

Totally agree with this 😊

Mid 50s here. I get on with most people, if I must, rarely socialise in big groups. I have a handful of friends that I enjoy seeing for a coffee, and we have really good, deep chats. Then I need time to myself to recuperate.
I am lucky because DH is similar and doesn't try to get me to socialise much either. We have a few couple friends that we occasionally have dinner with, and that's about it.
I get a little bit low if I go a whole day without seeing anyone though, but that's rare.
You really are not alone!

Same i am 41 and need time on my own am definitely an introvert
Hate social situations suffer with anxiety

I'm 38 and now spend 99% of my time away from work alone. I don't have a partner or children. I feel I need it and every interaction with people leaves me emotionally spent.

I do wonder if I'm actually isolating myself though, and I'll just end up old and lonely..... I can't help who I am though.

Telly, I also wish I'd listened to my intuition years ago. However, I'm so happy to hear there are others like me! Small talk is another thing I'm not able for any more... I find it draining. Give me a good book and a cuppa any day!