Hello Darkness my old friend

[Ohbuggerlugs]

Would anyone like a general chat? Rant? I’m going to just go ahead anyway...

I’m feeling very very tired, I’m thinking about possibly going to the GP about b12 deficiency, I’m already anaemic but control it but eating rare red meat often.

I’ve been going to the gym and getting myself into a routine and it’s helped until yesterday when I crashed and I’m nauseous when I stand, constant headache just not feeling fab.

I spend too much time on my phone. Far too much time.

I’ve just started volunteering at a local homeless centre.

My estranged sister is causing problems again which is really f#cking with me. Me and my mum had a falling out yesterday due to her speaking to me like shit through stress off her.

I haven’t spoken to my dad in months. A lot of resentment is there. I met him in early teens after years off him not wanting to meet me. I instigated the meet.

I haven’t seen any of my best friends in about 2 weeks and one in particular in about a month and a half, she’s got a new partner and it feels like she mightn’t know it, but were growing apart.

Partner is away and invited friend to come and stay, and then I cancelled because I literally just want to be alone.

I have a busy weekend this weekend and I just can not be bothered at all.

I’m normally terrible when partner is away from me he makes jokes about us calling each other after a few hours because we haven’t spoke, and we need to check in. I haven’t spoke to him for 6 hours and I’m really not bothered.

I had the dog out for two hours today just constantly playing with other dogs and it was fabulous, but it’s about as much as I could be arsed to do.

And I have SO much to do and I have done NOTHING.

I’m not depressed either, I have been in the past, and I am really not now. Just very tired (incase anyone thought I was)

Also considering getting another dog next year, a little puppy.

Erm, could go on. But yeah, if anyone fancies having a little chat then please do, I really can’t be bothered to speak to people in RL!

Lighthearted - Deep whatever you want.

Hellooo! I hear you! Me too in so many ways, and also, Brexit.

My lovely ddog had surgery for cancer in April - she has more lumps appearing. Can't face telling anyone yet.

@cittadina You know what, I’ve had my head completely in the sand over it because I’m scared as shit of it. It’s such a scary prospect. The fact no one knows what the hell they're doing is very very scary.

@Windydaysuponus I am so sorry, how old is your baby? Has the vet said whether they can be removed and what stage your baby is? My stomach has churned, I can only imagine your pain. 💐

May I join pls? I am also feeling tired! And ranty.

Had some health issues which appear to have been resolved but left me with a sense of stress and anxiety that I cannot kick. My partner and son are away and it's bad timing as they already cheer me up and FaceTime is not the same..

Also very tired from work. Busy time of the year and just got back from work travel and flights - exhausting!

Not to mention chores as I need to clean that house and I just aaaaaaaargh cannot be asked

I feel you OP

@sometimesalways the house is in a state. I’ve hid in the bedroom, and left the kitchen to fend for itself. This living business is hard there isn’t enough hours or energy in the day.

I hear you, I always feel better when my partner is here. The dog is just sleeping and I can’t wake her up and make her love me, that’s just cruel.

The season changing is rough I love winter, but I know it effects a lot of people’s mood. Seriously considering seeing GP RE B12, apparently it’s very common!

Hope you feel better soon, rant away if you find anything else. Leave the cleaning till tomorrow I say!

Ddog is 10 next week! Never had any health problems at all. Hates the vet. Hates everything and everyone except family.
Have decided to let her enjoy life as long as she appears pain free. The op and after care appointments were so stressful for her. Sedation every time and recovering to face another made me feel like I was being cruel. Lifespan for a rotty is 8-10 and she enjoys life so much. They found a heart murmur after surgery and doubt we be so lucky to get her through more tbh.
Here she is chilling with her siblings!

@Ohbuggerlugs thank you, and you too!

It makes me feel bad ranting about cleaning the house - feels like such a non problem. But I really cannot bring myself to do it and at the same time I cannot not care.

Def check with your GP re: vitamins. Do you take any supplements. Also thyroid function? It can affect mood and energy levels. Or we are just both very tired. It happens and there doesn't need to be a medical explanation I suppose.. life can be tiring

@Ohbuggerlugs, come darling. Let's have some wine a good chat and let's forget. I had this dream of retiring to a Portuguese fishing village where I could be a crazy old lady with purple hair...

@Windydaysuponus 10 is a good age, when we take on our baby’s we have already accepted a fate. She has had the BEST times she could have all because of YOU! And you need to just feel that through this time. Cry it all out, take days leave to mourn. A dogs love is like no other there is no comparison to the love they give. So I really do feel for you and your heart 💖

@sometimesalways I’ve bought some... but not taken any. I should though, it’s so stupid not to. Yes well I’ve been ridiculously busy the last few days, so I think this is just me slumping. But I needed to get stuff done, which means I have to cram it all in tomorrow which will be a nightmare!

Yes maybe we’re just tired little humans. It can’t be helped!!!

@Cittadina interesting. Have you any wishes to move to Portugal? Or the need to dye your hair purple? I’m personally already living the crazy lady life I must admit.

I dreamt of an old boyfriend the other night. Very vivid. Very odd. Made me wonder if he dreamt about me at the same time... it was my first though so the third eye could have been tinkering... weeeeeeeird heebeejeebee