I have a DS2 who is 9.5 years old. Has never been a good sleeper and frequently in our bed. Up until about 6 months ago it was manageable, he’d go to sleep in his own bed and wander into us around 3am and get in and back to sleep.
However things started to get gradually worse, he’d keep on getting up at bedtime, coming in earlier and earlier, really restless even in our bed. Went to the doctor to check for anything medical and all clear. He’s really happy at school, doing well and lots of friends. When we chat about it he just says he feels safer with me and doesn’t like to sleep alone. I can totally understand this but it is impacting him now as he won’t/can’t do sleepovers or even consider a school residential trip.
We had a sleep consultant come around a week ago as we feel at a bit of a loss at how to deal with it - as well as DH and I being tired I am so worried about DS2s poor quality of sleep and the effect it could be having on him. He has an older brother who is 11 and sleeps like an angel......
She spent a lot of time with us and devised a plan - basically gradual withdrawal of us sitting on a chair in his room until he’s asleep, no talking or touching. Do this at bedtime and every time he wakes up.
We’ve done 6 nights and each is getting worse and worse and last night just hideous. He was so anxious and weepy and it took hours to get him to settle. He then slept 4 hours before up again and it took me 3 hours of backwards and forwards before he dropped off again. So he ended up with nowhere near enough sleep although was happy when he got up.
We’ve had daily calls and she has said to persevere and things will get better but I’m struggling so much. I just want him to be as healthy and happy as possible and it feels so horrible to see him so upset.
Has anyone else done any sleep training with children this age and can reassure me things will get better???!