New job and I'm scared of having to move - Help and advice needed!

[Rochim20]

I'm feeling torn. I've been offered a new job which would mean having to move to South Wales. At first I was excited and looking forwards to a new start. After a couple of days, the worries have started to creep in.
I'm used to having family living across the road from me or no more than 30 minutes drive away, same with friends. If I move, my nearest family and friends would be around 200 miles away.
I know I'll make new friends in this job, it just scares me having to move away from a city I know and have lived all my life to somewhere I don't. I'm trying to mitigate some of my worries by looking at moving to either Swansea or Cardiff as the job is between the 2 rather than a town or village. I'm not really a city girl but I've spent all my life having everything pretty much either on my doorstep or a short trip away and it feels like it would just be too much of a shock to lose that right now.
I just need to snap out of it because there's no guarantee of progression if I stay where I am just because I'm scared of moving.
So, anyone with knowledge of Swansea or Cardiff (or even the area in between), where should I be looking as I don't know either city or even South Wales all that well.

Where's the job that it's halfway between the two?

I much preferred Cardiff to Swansea because I found Swansea way too small and depressing but my XH is obsessed with it.

@Rtmhwales It's in Pontyclun, so nearer to Cardiff. I can deal with the commute time from Swansea, I've done similar and longer commutes in other jobs, so not a huge issue to be in Swansea.

What's your personal circumstance, do you have a partner or children?
I'm not sure I'd move to Pontyclun or surrounding for work... Is this a really amazing opportunity or could you swap employer and get something equally good / better?

@Coutrylifeornot No children or partner. The job is more money than I'm currently on and has the chance of progression. My current employer can't guarantee me progression beyond where I am now, though they have said they could increase my pay.
For me, it's not about the money, it's the progression options. If my current employer could offer me the chance of progression, I'd happily stay, but that chance isn't there.
Admittedly, the new job hasn't outright said I'm guaranteed progression, but when I asked about progression opportunities, they said that they were available, which my current employers have just shrugged off as said maybe, but probably not.

There is absolutely nothing unique in Pontyclun or surrounding apart from the Mint, and it doesn't sound like you're goj g there?
You sound like a homebird and sure that's grand, embrace it!
I don't think it has to be the job where you currently are, or Pontyclun, there are always options.
Before dc I always got offered promotions etc at work , it's about attitude and enthusiasm, (I've certainly lost my work sparkle for the moment just now) not moving 200 miles to a place where you don't want to live. Think outside the box, there are opportunities everywhere.

Not sure a job is worth giving up a good local community, friends and family for to be honest. Could you move back if you found you didn't settle? That's the main thing really - go off and give it a go - it might be fantastic - but have a back-up plan just in case. Much easier to make a go of things if you've not burnt your bridges and feel full of regret. Just knowing that you have the chance to turn back often gives you the confidence to carry on (well, I find this anyway!).

I could always move back if things didn't work out, but not to the same job I have currently.
When I was 18, I wanted to move away to go to university. Sadly, I didn't get into any of the universities I wanted to go away to (I got into a local one, which is a good uni, but there's not much point moving into halls when you live 20 minutes from the uni you're attending anyway).
It's not necessarily me being a homebird, it's more that I haven't moved home since I was 4, so the stress of moving home is a completely new thing to me. Also, I don't like not being organised. Once I've got accommodation sorted, I should be better with the stress and worry because I know where I'm going, can work out my route to work and alternatives.
I've been applying for promotions at work for the last 7 years. Every time, I've been passed over in favour of someone else. The first time they said (but never specified it being essential until after the interviews) that they wanted someone with experience of supervising others. I got that experience. Then another excuse was found, and another, and another. Every time I've done what they said they were looking for that they added on as an afterthought, the goal posts have been moved. Now, they can't guarantee even the slightest whiff of progression. So, I looked elsewhere. Them changing the goalposts helped me get this new job. I can't be certain of finding something similar near to where I live, that can offer progression.

Just over an alternative perspective. The thing is you don't know what you don't know and what you might be able to adapt to or change. just because you've always had friends and family stay locally (and those people around you) and also opted to stay in a local communities it doesn't necessarily mean that you couldn't try something different (and might have all skills to learn to adapt and change). It's just that you've never given yourself that opportunity and you've always either self labelled or had others around you label yourself and your friends and family as 'people who stay together' or 'homebirds'. You are very clear at the prospects for your career are pretty poor where you currently are. If doing something interesting and your work life is important then that part of you.

Can you go but think of it as a means to an end? e.g. go for five years with the goal of getting that progression so you can move into a higher job closer to home again later?

Ahhh, your update sounds more like some understandable worries about not knowing some of the details.... I think if you sent down for a weekend and flat hunted that might help. A professional house share might be great as it would help you meet new people. I like both Cardiff and Swansea.. Why don't you have a mooch around affordable areas in both to see what floats your boat?

I'd go. I hate moving house (hate it, passionately) but it's done me a lot of good during my life! I wouldn't be who I am without it. And one of my moves was abroad to a country I'd never been too, completely alone.

Do your due diligence. Go spend some time in the place and see if you can see yourself living there, look for housing you can afford, find social events you can go and meet people at. It always feels better with a plan, and it doesn't have to be a forever move.

Going against the grain here I think you should go for it. At worst, you hate it and after a year or so move back with an enhanced CV. At best it’s a fantastic opportunity. Do it now whilst you have the freedom. We did Cambridge to Bristol and yes, it was a long way home but we had a fab four years in the West Country.

I love Cardiff. All the goos things about beimg in a city buy not overwhelming like London.

I think you should go for it, it'll be a experience and you'll meet new people and grow as a person. If you don't like it you can always go back.

You don't have kids to think about, so you can just up sticks, make the most of it I reckon!

*good not goos!

I lived in Swansea and quite liked it, I used to go to the beach a fair amount and I loved the Mumbles. Cardiff has a lot going on and there are some really nice areas, albeit some dodgy ones too.

I am very much the sort of person to try it for a while and then if I don't like it, better to regret something I have done than regret something I haven't. Though I will say, living away from family never bothered me as I am not super close to them anyway.

A professional house share might be great as it would help you meet new people

This is a great idea, a good way to meet people.

Go. I have a friend who moved to Cardiff and she loves it.

Embrace the change.

Thanks everyone. I've got a list of properties that I'll be viewing over the next few weekends, so hopefully one of them will right.