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Original poster

Girl/boy friends going off to University...

32 replies

BertrandRussell · 18/09/2019 10:26

Anyone else got an 18 year old whose girl/boyfriend is going off to university and they aren’t?
Ds has been with his girlfriend for a year, and they are a very happy, settled couple- insofar as you can be at that age. She’s off to university on Saturday and he’s staying home. Anyone else’s child in the same position? Are they planning visits-optimistic about it lasting?
I’m in two minds. A bit of me wants her to end it so she can go to University free of ties and experience it to the full- but he would be so sad if she did. And how can I best help poor left behind ds?

OP posts:

Shazzanat · 20/09/2019 11:49

They might suprise you OP. This was me and my DH when we were 17/18 with one going to uni and one staying home. We ended up getting married in our early 20s and now have fantastic DCs. We're also doing very well financially despite any doom or gloom anyone might tell you about young relationships being too serious ;). We were very much an older couple trapped in young people's body's from the beginning and me and DH were honestly so much happier during uni times spending time together when we could rather than the whole "uni experience". It wasn't THAT long ago for us (we're now very early 30s and very happy).

BasiliskStare · 20/09/2019 15:59

Possibly @Bertrandrussell a bit of a rite of passage. - they could come though the whole thing but not every time is a relationship at an early age successful ( of course of course they can be )

wendz86 · 20/09/2019 16:15

I went to uni and my ex didn’t . It wasn’t far away and he would visit often . We did break up twice and got back together during that time as it was hard . We were together a long time after and had our two children before splitting up .

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18 years old Dating General relationships

Witchend · 20/09/2019 16:17

My experience is very few last, even those that go to the same uni. Most fail in the first term.
Those that do last though, most married and are still married 20 years later.

purpleolive · 20/09/2019 16:21

I was that girl, I went to uni over 150 miles away and studied abroad for a term, he never went to university. We celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary soon 😊 it wasn't easy, ups and downs but certainly set a strong foundation for our relationship. If it's meant to be, it'll be, if not they will learn from it and move on I'm sure.

purpleolive · 20/09/2019 16:24

Actually come to think of it I can name at least 4 couples close to me who started out in high school and later married (and still together) although unlike us they did both go to uni.

Groovee · 20/09/2019 16:29

My Dd moved to uni last year, it's only an hour away. But her ex dumped her within 4 weeks. He came crawling back around Christmas but she called it quits in August as she would rather be single than someone who moans at her for having to move to follow her dream. Despite being Scotland's capital city there were no teaching 4 years courses last year in Edinburgh so she had to move.

He was a nice lad but too much baggage. I think Dd should have the freedom to have fun x

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