IBS and anxiety

[ElleDriver]

I've had a rough few weeks and my anxiety has flared up a bit. I can cope with that but one of the awful side effects is ibs issues that are becoming really debilitating.

For context I do occasionally suffer from the odd upset tummy and urgency anyway but nothing too severe. But I find when I'm anxious it gets really bad with urgency and looseness (sorry tmi). And then because I'm fretting about that my anxiety gets worse. It's a vicious cycle.

For example the other day dp and I went to visit some of his distant relatives. Long ish car journey. Almost immediately I start getting anxious thinking what if I need the loo on the motorway and there's nowhere to stop? What if I have to go at their house and they know? Then the fear and overthinking literally makes me need to go! Luckily I'd dosed myself up on Imodium but that's hardly a healthy or long term solution. The same thing happens if we are on a long woodland walk with the dogs with no toilets in sight. Or sometimes even if dp is in the bathroom and I know I can't go have a poo immediately I need to. And don't get me started on buses or unfamiliar places where I don't know where the toilet is.

Does anyone else suffer like this and do you have any coping mechanisms that can help? I have holidays and days out planned that I feel are going to be ruined by this if I don't address it.

Have you tried CBT OP?

You're in the exact same position as I was. I'm better now, not 100% but i cope and manage my anxiety really well.

Like you i get a dodgey tum every so often, but when my anxiety is bad my tummy is alot worse and I'm too scared to leave the house.

However, CBT taught me that it's a perfectly natural response when you have anxiety or a panic attack, your body is in fight or flight mode and the adrenaline ect is preparing you to run away, so your body naturally wants to empty itself in order to make you lighter, so that you can run faster. I also used to get really sweaty hands when having an attack, this again is because your body is "lubing" you up, so that if a predator was trying to catch you, your sweat makes you slippery so that you can get away.

It's all out natural defence mechanism working, just working overtime and in overdrive. I find that alone has helped me control my attacks, because I'm not worrying about the symptoms now, I know why they happen.

I'm sorry you're going through it, I remember when I hit my lowest point it was truly a horrendous time.

I really would reccomend CBT, and perhaps taking a trip to the library (or amazon) for some books, I read 'my anxious mind's and another book I cant remember the name of. They taught me breathing exercises, these helped a ton too! I still do then when I get a anxiety or panic attacks and now they only last minutes instead of days or hours.

Just read the rest of your post..

You are identical to me! I asked DP not to have a shower last night because I was worried I was going to need the toilet while he was in there! Terrible but we had just had Chinese

Weirdly I did try CBT for this a few years ago but I didn't find it helpful. Then it sort of subsided for a while and wasn't a problem. For some reason it's back with a vengeance now and I'm finding it really hard. It never affects me when I'm in my usual routine of school run, work etc, it's only when something different or problematic is on the cards.

I have heard about the fight or flight mechanism and it makes total sense when you think about it. But it's like mine has gone into overdrive.

The ultimate fear is having an accident or having to go somewhere highly impractical like in the woods (which I once very nearly had to!)

I know the feeling.

We recently got stuck in bad traffic on the motorway when going shopping.

I was crying in the car telling DP that if traffic didnt start moving soon I was going to sh#t myself. Its laughable now, as I didnt have an accident and was absolutely find when the car started moving again. But it's the thought that there is nowhere you can go urgently if you need to.

It sounds a but cliche and a bit like I've given up, but sometimes when I'm having a brave day, I can go out and say to myself, if I have an accident in public then that's what's going to happen and I'll have to deal with it afterwards. That helps too, as I think you just tell yourself that "shit happens" (literally sometimes) and you just have to love life without anxiety getting in the way.

Luckily, I dont think I've ever actually had an accident, it just the uncomfortable stomach churning and gurgling like I'm going to.

When I was 17 DP got me a dodgey kebab when I stayed at his dad house, we had only been together for a couple months and wssnt in the comfortable to pop around each other stage yet, but I HAD to go, and I coukdnt go in his house, so he drove me home while i cried that i was going to shit in his 30k new car. I didnt, I held it for 20 minutes until I got home.

But I think our minds are stronger than we think.

My heart really does go out to you

With regard to Imodium my consultant gastroenterologist told me that one of my options for managing my symptoms was just to take Imodium every day for life (I have ibs-d).

I actually largely manage it through a low fibre diet but he said taking Imodium is harmless and can be used long term as it just slows down the digestive system.

I’m not suggesting you take it all the time but hearing that made me not worry about taking it preemptively if I know I am going to be in a situation where I may not be able to get immediate toilet access.

Hope it calms soon for you OP.

Thank you it does help to know I'm not alone. You see other people going about life and wonder why they aren't suffering too.

A lot of it is in the mind. I haven't had an accident yet but I've felt scarily close before. Certain foods set me off so obviously I avoid those before any long journeys and if I'm worried I will take Imodium in advance. I think I maybe need to stop giving it so much thought and power...

OP I absolutely feel you. I feel like my life is dictated by toilets! As soon as I know I don't have quick access to the loo I find I'm very crampy and terrified I'm going to have to go. I've recently transferred in my job (temporary, thank God) to a branch that requires me to use the tube instead of my usual 10 minute walk, I find I feel terrible the whole journey, convinced I need to go, then I get off and into work and I feel fine. I'll do anything in my power to avoid travelling on the motorway! I don't think people really understand the mental impact IBS can have, it's so much more than 'just an upset stomach'.

Full English breakfast and a bacon and mushroom sandwich are my two killers. Either one of those and I have to stay home all day.

I always thought Imodium was pretty bad for you. It tends to stop me going for a good few days which is sometimes a blessing! But then when I need to go again it can be quite traumatic 😂 but it's reassuring to know it can be taken often safely.

Apparently there is a strong brain/gut link so it all makes sense. Just wish I could get control of it as it's so unpleasant both mentally and physically.

Same here. More I worry about needing to go more I need to go. Morning's are worse. Especially long car journeys in a morning.
I take an Imodium a day. Doctor says this is absolutely fine and it keeps my toilet anxiety at bay.

I think I once heard that if you take Imodium too often it can become less effective? I certainly do rely on it for long journeys or certain situations. But I have to take two for it to be fully effective and that often leaves me unable to go for days after

I used to suffer from IBS, and I know the panic of not having access to a loo immediately making you need the loo. So frustrating.

I wondered if anyone had success with hypnotherapy?