Come and talk to me about living rurally...

[LittleGinBigGin]

Well dh, dc x 2 and I have moved to the country, I think I may have drunk too much gin when I agreed to this

We now live in the middle of no where...literally 10 other houses and 4 of these are second homes so only ever occupied at weekends.

Our nearest neighbors are over 300m away (probably more I’m rubbish with distance)

I’m having a massive head wobble and have no idea how planned we have to be for the winter etc

Obviously heating oil is the first thing on my list and finding a supplier of wood for the fire!

I have also ordered a chest freezer!

I have just found out that during the winter the electricity goes off quite a bit, so lots of candles needed.

The house is definitely cooler tonight (weather app says it’s going as low as 6 ) so have put extra blankets on the kids bed and mine.

What else do I have to do?? I’m totally in over my head

@blobby10 yes I think that is the minimum order for around here, but I don’t think of it as a small amount- it lasts us six months!! We have been on oil for half a century, so got used to the stick method long before sensor indicator things came out (our neighbour’s indicator has been wrong twice and they’ve run out).

Regular power cuts here so torch in every room. Candles, matches, lighters.

PS, not standard practice, I’m sure, but we have managed a couple of extra days when we’d run out by jacking the opposite side of the tank to the pipe up an inch or so! No more or you risk damaging the pipes. (Husband is a mechanic and father is an engineer, so good at devious emergency repairs!)

Bloody hell, 25 miles from the nearest town, where the heck have you moved to?!

I'm almost hyperventilating at the thought of living like this!

It's really not that hard to be 25 miles away from the nearest town in rural UK. It doesn't mean you are 25 miles away from everything.

I'm 20 miles from our nearest town but I can still get a pint, visit a playground, post a parcel or a get a prescription within a 10 minute drive to a nearby village.

Get a couple of rechargeable torches that automatically switch on when the power goes off. Put one on the landing and one in the hall.

Our first power cut after moving out to the country scared the living daylights out of DD1 because she had just gone to bed and had never been in a house in total darkness before. Our previous house was street lit throughout at night and there are none where we live now.

As a real city girl who moved somewhere semi-rural-ish in my mid thirties (and now live in a semi-rural seaside town), I'd say:

1. Keep the freezer stocked. Yes, you can freeze milk. And cheese. And batch cooking results. And most things, really.

1. Buy a bread machine and make sure you've always got bread flour, yeast and some kind of oil with some kind of sugar (honey or whatever works for you). That way you will always be able to make bread, assuming you have power. Soda bread is a good quick standby as well. Similarly, make sure you have a reasonable store of cupboard essentials like soup or whatever; custard is especially good as you can eat it cold if necessary.

1. Consider solar panels/small backup generator/kelly kettle/gas camping stove just in case.

1. Have a basic mobile phone for backups just in case your fancy Smartphone can't get a signal. (Yes, Devon and Somerset, I'm looking at you.) Make sure at least one phone is always charged and think about those battery pack things. Become accustomed to waving your phone around randomly as you try to pick up a signal. In one part of Scotland where I stayed for a short time you had to walk about half a kilometre from the house until you actually got any signal at all.

1. Have good boots/wellies and waterproofs; the jackets we have were bought second hand and are very good makes, and we re-waterproof them every now and then; it works pretty well. We bought the boots new, and again, re-waterproof them every now and then. I'm not anticipating having to buy many more new boots in my lifetime. Though I do now confess to finding outdoor stores strangely fascinating.

1. Get used to the smell of muck-spreading at certain times of year. And anyone who thinks the countryside is "quiet" has never heard the dawn chorus or listened to the sound of sheep or cows or dogs (all much, much nicer than city noise of cars and things, in my opinion). ;)

1. Smile at the neighbours and say hello; depending on where you are most people will be only too happy to help you and welcome you and make sure you're all right, especially in winter. If there are village societies (WI, drama, book group, eco-group, karate, whatever), think about joining at least one that appeals to you. Try not to gossip unless it's nice gossip (you know, new babies, Mrs Milligan's new sheep, that kind of thing). If you want to see how NOT to behave when you move to the country, read a few of Liz Jones's columns in the Daily Mail....

1. Keep your car in good condition; have your AA or RAC details to hand; make sure you've got screenwash/water to top up and maybe a "snacks and water" mini kit just in case you get stuck somewhere; also, as I think someone else has already said, a bit of old carpet in case you get stuck in mud or snow as it'll help your car get a bit of traction. We're thinking about winter tyres this year as one of us does a lot of driving for their job (healthcare).

1. Battery or wind-up radio and torch.

10. Staying warm. I can't remember where I read it, but it was along the lines of "our ancestors knew to insulate themselves. We attempt to insulate our dwellings". Layers. Layers are your friend. Wool, raw silk, cotton, merino, good socks, scarves, hats, fingerless gloves, dressing gowns/jackets with hoods, gilets (padded or not) - in winter, all of these are your friends. As are hot water bottles and flasks. I've only lived in a couple of places where we had oil heating, but it was actually very warm and not much more expensive than gas or electricity - the oil company was really good at suggesting how frequently I'd need to fill up for the size of the house, they got it pretty much spot on. We did also have a local garage where you could buy emergency oil if necessary so maybe check that out just in case. Try and make sure your car always has at least half a tank of fuel in her tummy. Know the locations of the nearest doctor, hospital, pharmacy, supermarket.

11. Reflective jackets, as someone else mentioned, especially if you're going to need to go out in the dark and there are cars about - I think these are actually compulsory in some parts of Ireland now (I first came across them as standard wear after dusk in the very lovely but very dark Donegal), but not in England yet.

12. Get used to having a very different sense of humour, and also to random acts of kindness and generosity - this time of year, for instance, I'm just betting there are big baskets of apples and other fruit on people's walls with little notices saying: "please help yourself". Maybe get a couple of books to help you identify which plants to avoid and which ones are safe.

It took me a few years to adjust, but I'm not sure I could ever go back and live in a city now...the town where we currently live gets too busy for me at times and we're looking at moving somewhere more rural again.

Good tips on here. Watch out with the headtorch, attracts massive moths!

I do recommend spending a bit extra on kiln dried logs, we wasted a lot of money experimenting with different seasoned/softwood/hardwood and froze in the process. Mountain ash is the best, but beech is more freely available. I buy night brickettes from a company on Facebook called Letko - if you put them in the woodburner when you go to bed, they burn all night. In the morning you just have to empty the ash pan, give the embers a stir, reload, and it will take again. I ran out of kindling during the beast from the east in Northumberland, had to go out in deep snow to find sticks in the garden :( My sheltand sheepdog wasn't amused.
Have learnt my lesson and stocked up this year, fir cones are handy too. Just a few spread around the kindling to keep it going at first.

For shoes, I recommend crocs with socks, plus the Sorel Tofino waterproof boots, I wear them nearly all autumn/winter in and out of the house. Can also get sheepskin innersoles for added warmth.
They are more comfortable and much lighter than the Sorel Joan of Artic or Aigle wellies. Our house is so cold we wear our coats indoors sometimes - with the hoods up. I'm dreading it!

Good luck and enjoy the good things!

My rules about Living Rurally - I live in a village 15 miles away from nearest town in a vastly underpopulated bit of Scotland

Rule 1 = Don't get involved in local politics for at least 5 years.

Rule 2 - avoid local gossip like the plague. Listen to all you can but don't pass ANY on - again for at least five years until you know who is related to whom and who has been/still is shagging who (and how those two sets possibly overlap).

Rule 3 - make friends with the local fuzz. (The other day, ten miles away from home, and half a mile up a single track dead-end road, a police car drew up next to me and asked me for directions because they 'were lost'. That was a strangely satisfying experience.)

Bloody hell, 25 miles from the nearest town, where the heck have you moved to?!
I live in a very rural part of the Highlands, over an hours drive to my nearest town!

I live in a very rural part of the Highlands, over an hours drive to my nearest town!

Ah well there I CAN help you out:

Highland Driving
1- Assume any sheep you meet on the road are stupid and suicidal. - Most high velocity sheep / car interfacing happens when lambs are old enough to wander a bit away from their mums - when threatened they come together. If they are on opposite sides of the road and coming together means both of them running into the path of the thing that is threatening them (i.e. you in the car) then that's exactly what they will do.

3- Assume all deer are stupid and suicidal. They are also bigger and make bigger dents in your car. You don't have to report hitting a deer. You do have to report hitting a sheep

2 - Assume all tourists you meet on the road are stupid and suicidal. (Tourists often drive rental cars which are usually very clean, have this year's number plates, and no stupid 'Baby on Board' type personalisation. Give them plenty of room - especially at junctions when many of them reflexively turn onto the wrong side of the road. Happens in front of me several times a year. )

I have also observed tourists reversing round roundabouts (seriously!): Doing 3 point turns on busy trunk A roads, Reversing onto busy trunk A roads, Starting to do 3 point turns on the Fort William bypass (the only stretch of dual carriageway for miles in any direction), driving while holding their mobile phones out of the window filming the scenery, and so on, and so on. Seriously, they are a nightmare. Give them a LOT of idiot space.

Sadly you also have to report hitting tourists.

3 - Single track road with passing places:

If you're going the same way as someone - fall back and leave a LONG way between you and him so you can BOTH get into passing places when encountering oncoming dickheads who don't know the rules.

ALWAYS wave 'thank you' to the other guy even if they have been a dickhead (he may well be the next tradesman you employ - or turn out to be your doctor.)

If the passing place is on YOUR left, you are expected to pull into it and let the other guy through.

So if the emergency services needed to reach you in adverse weather conditions, how would that work? I'm incredulous that you'd move to such a cut off location with 2 DC

Brit in rural USA here, we live 2ish hours from any emergency services, we have a 6 month old, any problems we just deal with ourselves. It’s a lifestyle choice.

OP you have received some great advice the only things I would add are to brush up on first aid skills and learn to use a chainsaw

TheSandma. You forgot pheasants! They too are stupid and suicidal. In fact, they specifically wait for cars to come along and jump in front of you.
Eat the deer!

Sorry I was out and about yesterday.

I have found a town about 12 miles away, in the other direction, Which has the most amazing well stocked co-op

I have done a massive order from amazon (which do deliver but won’t be next day) of things like hot water bottles, those led lamps, batteries.

We have a gas bbq, which is currently sat in the shed so we have another source of cooking for when the electric goes out.

No local pub!!

Tomorrow I am off to the big town and I shall do an absolutely massive food shop and stock up as much as I can.

When your kids gets to about 14 expect them to spend all their time in a field or a hay barn taking acid and experimenting with group sex.

The countryside is laarvely for kids...until it isn't!

Seriously it sounds like a great adventure, but very hard work! I couldn't live anywhere I can't get an Uber.

If you hit a pheasant, it can go through the grill if your car and make a hole in your radiator.

If you hit a rabbit, it can flip up and leave a massive dent in the bonnet of your car that needs beating out.

Don’t ask me how I know these things.

And you have to able to drive over wildlife, not swerve to miss it and hit other cars in the process.

OP do a supermarket delivery check on all of the big ones.

We are 33 miles from biggest town. Tesco and Asda will deliver. Though not in bad weather. The others will not.

It does mean for a huge heavy shop it saves the Agro. I get a home delivery one in four.

Buy sledges.

A good heavy bottom pan for making soup on the wood burner is handy.

Never run low on wine, it will snow.

Mountain warehouse sales good for thermals and waterproofs.

Head torches are better than hand ones for going out and about. Led ones.

Matches, lots of matches.

When your kids gets to about 14 expect them to spend all their time in a field or a hay barn taking acid and experimenting with group sex.
The countryside is laarvely for kids...until it isn't!

110 percent this!

Are there schools nearby? Basically you don't need to worry about the house as much as the car, as that's where you will be spending the majority of your time. I speak from bitter experience

Heating oil varies in price daily according to demand.

So right now, is a "low" price (but still expensive!) In the middle of Beast from the East when everyone realises their 1 month supply is only going to last a week, twice as expensive. Plan ahead.

Trewser Clearly a poor experience. There are often school buses. Many rural children board at sixth form.
Mine definitely didn’t have time for rolling around doing drugs in haystacks as far too busy with a huge range of activities.
The real benefit of rural living is that you do know where your children are and who they are with. Nothing goes unnoticed, everyone knows everyone including teenagers. If they want to go to s party, they have to be collected, so you see what sort of party it was and the state they are in on departure. None of this ‘you can’t know where they are’ nonsense.

Not many can afford boarding at 6th form. Learning to drive is more of an investment.

Mine are very sporty so have swerved most of the rural malaise, but they have missed out on the cultural capital of a big city. Art galleries, shops, museums, diversity of all kinds. They adore London and dd2 is desperate to move to a big city.

I am very jealous! We lived in the middle of nowhere and the most valuable thing we had was the generator (and our own well but if you're on mains it's unnecessary, although if possible the water is SO much better). We didn't stock up on much as we never got snowed in (south coast of Ireland, rarely snows) but always kept an eye on the oil. You'll adjust really quickly then never want to come back if you're anything like me