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Does anyone ever ask women they don't know for a tampon/sanitary towel in public toilets?

159 replies

TurtleyLost · 01/09/2019 08:12

I'm nearly 40 and I've never done this, or had anyone ask me. Friends yes, strangers no.

Is this something that women really do?

OP posts:
ItIsWhatItIsInnit · 01/09/2019 23:57

I have - I've also asked an air stewardess as I got a surprise period just before a 12 hour flight!

TreacherousPissFlap · 02/09/2019 00:17

I've been asked at work and never batted an eyelid.

This post has made me realise though that unless it was absolutely dire straits I would never ask. When this happened to me I scoffed a sandwich while driving furiously to the local shop on my lunch break Hmm

Clare45BST · 02/09/2019 00:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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HuntIdeas · 02/09/2019 00:39

I’ve been asked once by a stranger that I recall (in work toilets but I didn’t know her)

All those people that say to use a toilet roll wad obviously don’t know how heavy some women’s periods can be!!! No way that would last more than a few minutes

ncabcdefg · 02/09/2019 02:22

I asked my GP once, she ended up having to go through to the nurse as she only had super plus tampons that were no use for me Blush. Sadly the nurse only had great big incontinence things but better than nothing . Of all the places you’d think they’d keep pads a surgery would be one .

Teddybear45 · 02/09/2019 02:57

Yes I did as before medication my periods were irregular and heavy from day 1. I would normally just ask the cleaner in our toilets as they tended to be most prepared due to the costs in our building (sanitary towels cost £2 per towel otherwise).

LoreleiRock · 02/09/2019 02:59

If you are referring to that Vice article linked to earlier. I also agree it is not a common practice at all. I also think women know who to ask, if they had to, and it certainly would not be the author of that ridiculous fantasy.

tectonicplates · 02/09/2019 06:03

I've never had to ask anyone. Theoretically I'd have no hesitation in doing so, but actually I'd be worried about being given one of those awful scented ones.

I've never been asked by a stranger in a public toilet. I've been asked maybe three or four times ever by work colleagues. At least two of those times, they've asked me for a tampon and I've had to say sorry, I only have towels. Neither of them took me up on it. They went and asked someone else instead.

So it does happen very occasionally, but it's far rarer than people seem to think. I've wondered about it myself because even some women's magazines have perpetuated this myth. I've seen casual references to it in women's articles, creating a bit of an urban legend. I've also seen a few comments here on MN where mums are giving towels to their daughters and telling them to help other girls out if someone asks. Which is a great thing to tell your daughters, of course, but barely ever happens.

So I do think the media have subtly perpetuated this myth. I don't think JY got the idea from out of nowhere.

Fink · 02/09/2019 06:18

I've never had to ask, but I've been asked twice. Once was in front of a whole group of men (priests) by a desperate woman who was running from group to group. We were at a huge Catholic festival in a foreign country and she couldn't find a pharmacy/ local to ask so was just approaching any woman.

StoatofDisarray · 02/09/2019 06:31

I have never asked, I tend to go for the stuff my crotch with tissue paper option. However I have been asked. I have never been able to give

StoatofDisarray · 02/09/2019 06:31

Apologies, pressed send too soon! I was going to say that on the couple of occasions I have been asked I haven't had a tampon only because I only carry them when I'm on my period not all the time. Should've said all this in the past tense because I've gone through the menopause now.

BertrandRussell · 02/09/2019 06:56

If you think about it, it really should be a perfectly normal thing to do. 51% of the population menstruate at some point. Why do we still try to pretend we don’t- even with other women?

MrsPellegrinoPetrichor · 02/09/2019 07:35

If you think about it, it really should be a perfectly normal thing to do. 51% of the population menstruate at some point. Why do we still try to pretend we don’t- even with other women?
I had no idea it wasn't a normal thing until I read this thread but I find MN pretty far removed from my experience of normal life tbh.

MargueritaBlue · 02/09/2019 08:16

I don't think women are pretending we don't menstruate- it's surely more that women are generally prepared and don't need to rely on the kindness of strangers.

I've never asked because I've never had need to.

OrchidInTheSun · 02/09/2019 08:28

There is a weird shame around periods. We don't talk about it much except with close friends.

I've read threads on here where men refuse to buy san pro when doing the shop.

It's interesting that when they transition they think we chat openly about it all the time. Zero idea of female socialisation once again

Socksontheradiator · 02/09/2019 08:55

Do we pretend we don't, Bertrand?
I don't chat with strangers in toilets about it, anymore than I discuss my bowel habits. I don't see that as pretending any of these aren't part of our lives.

SarahTancredi · 02/09/2019 09:07

I don't think women are pretending we don't menstruate- it's surely more that women are generally prepared and don't need to rely on the kindness of strange

Yy it has nothing to do with Shane about periods and being afraid to ask. It's just that we just dont .

Just like we dont stand around naked talking to each other playfully slapping each others arses, whipping each other with towels and telling people how nice their boobs look in that bra...

Or any other pornified fantasy idea that we get up to in our spaces men want in on so badly whilst simultaneously saying " we just wanna pee" and " you never notice"

OrchidInTheSun · 02/09/2019 09:17

Or telling one another that we look cute (or indeed telling ourselves that we feel/look cute) which is just another anime fuelled fantasy of women

Mummyoflittledragon · 02/09/2019 09:23

😂😂😂loving those fantasy comments

I have occasionally told someone they look good in something in a shop changing room.

Rufusthebewilderedreindeer · 02/09/2019 09:23

I don't pretend i don't have periods

In the same i don’t pretend i don’t shit

Its a perfectly normal body function and if it comes up I’m happy to talk about it...not me having a poop, the period bit

Im assuming someone said it up thread and its been extrapolated out

Though weirdly it very rarely comes up in random conversations with strangers

Rufusthebewilderedreindeer · 02/09/2019 09:25

I have occasionally told someone they look good in something in a shop changing room

Well yes, but ive never told a grown woman she looks cute

I dont know any women that want to look cute

I reserve cute for small children, as even tweens generally want to look cute

I do appreciate cute might mean something different to some people Grin

OrchidInTheSun · 02/09/2019 09:30

Good, yes. Cute, never

notacooldad · 02/09/2019 09:33

No, never been asked nor have I asked.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 02/09/2019 09:36

Never asked, never been asked.
When my two children were babies I have been asked for nappies and wipes. Never sanpro. Actually thanks to a period tracking app I now use I'm never caught short.

Rufusthebewilderedreindeer · 02/09/2019 09:45

Oopsie

Even tweens DONT want to be cute

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