Back to school and uniforms

[Drummerma]

Name changed as I'm embarrassed

So I'm a mum of 4 boys they are 16, 10, 8 and 6.

Ex has left me and isn't paying maintenance as he's unemployed.

My eldest is going to college and doesn't have to wear uniform so that's good but will still have to give him money for lunch and buy him a bus pass.

My 10 year old is going into year 6 and needs new shirts, shoes (his shoes from last year are falling apart) and he is going to take his own lunch but is going to use his old lunchbox and school bag from last year

8 year old is going into year 4 and needs jumpers, trousers, shoes (his shoes are also falling Apart) and a new lunchbox as his zip has fallen off.

6 year old needs trousers, shoes (his are small) and a coat (that's small aswell)

Plus the younger 3 need things for lunches. No idea how I'm going to do it as I've only got £20 to last until next week and they go back next week

I've asked ex and he's said no even though I know he's got money as he's just bought a new car.

I have no family/friends I can ask

Any advice??

Will the uniform not hand down?

Any uniform banks locally?

If your on a low income have you checked about free school dinners and bus passes?

Are you claiming all your entitled too?

All the younger 3 don't like school dinners as my youngest is still entitled to them as he's ks1 but he doesn't like them.

The only things they REALLY need are shoes and a coat for youngest but the rest of the uniform they need is small.

No uniform banks locally unfortunately.

Can you apply for a uniform grant? I know they are available in my local authority. Maybe the school has a used uniform bank. Ours has just recently set one up

what shoe sizes are the boys?

only asking as there are lots going on ebay for under £5

Could you contact the PTA? Sometimes they have a stash of second hand ones.

Someone will be in school from Monday on training days. You might find school leadership could lend you some of their spares (my school keep spare uniform for lost/damaged/uniform issuesituations).

School dinners you might have to suck up I'm afraid. There's usually an option available. Also, even if you're not eating them, still claim them if you are entitled to them as school get additional money to spend on those students from disadvantaged backgrounds. Contrary to popular belief, it doesn't mean each child has a set amount with their name on it; schools have to account for the spending as a cohort, but school may well use some of that pupil premium money to fund your children's uniforms.

Beyond that, gumtree could be a good place to look or Facebook groups for local areas.

there is a coat age 6-7 going on shpock here for £5

Will see if the school have any spare uniforms

Will have a look on eBay etc.

My 10 yearold is an adult 4, my 8 year old is an adult 2 and my 6 year old is an kids 12.5/adult 1

also in terms of food, do you have a foodbank near you?

I’m sure school will have second hand uniform. For the free school meals, ask if he can have a sandwich instead? This would save quite a bit.

Do you have any local Facebook selling pages? Ours has lots of school uniform posts with most uniform going for £1 or so or being free.
If your income is low do you qualify for food bank vouchers or a uniform grant?
Is your ex paying maintenance? Is he paying the correct amount?
Ask at the school to see if they have available uniform or unclaimed lost property that you could have.

Look in you're looking area op and fb for uniform banks..I donated quite abit to my local one in august. Also the charity shops they also get an influx of clothes. They had school shoes in asda for £5

I'll have a look at selling pages on fb. We don't have a uniform bank local to us

Ex isn't paying any maintenance as he's unemployment and I've asked him if he would give me money for uniforms and he said no. Although the other day he bought a new car

Could you get a credit op not ideal but will get you by?

I don’t think a coat is massively important, it will still be warm next week and probably for the rest of September (usually is).

Try local charity shops or eBay for shoes. The lunchbox without a zip will be fine for now.

Will none of the uniform hand down between siblings.

Our school has a second hand uniform shop, we sell things on really cheap (50p a jumper etc), really worth asking your school if the PTA do something similar

Let’s get the important bit out of the way. How have you got in this situation knowing they needed uniform all summer? I say this not be judgey but to help you budget. Are there any ways you can cut back? Are you getting any benefits you’re entitled too? I would get that sorted going forward. Are you entitled to a uniform grant?

Firstly when you next get money get a maintenance case open.

Secondly tell the kids they’ve got to have the free school dinners. Sometimes needs must and if they’re hungry they’ll eat.

Thirdly not ideal but can you get a 0% credit card? Put the uniform etc on it and then cut it up and pay it monthly/weekly?

Let’s get the important bit out of the way. How have you got in this situation knowing they needed uniform all summer

^this

The school will be able to help even if it's lost property for a bit if the alternative is missing school or breaking the rules they will help. It would be worth posting on Gumtree, freegle and freecycle as well as getting to the charity shops
I got my middle sons uniform at the start of summer totally free from a nice lady on freegle whose son had outgrown it and my youngest is just starting his all came from charity shops (except the flipping logo'd jumper) I got £20 toward shoes last term as well when I was in dire straits after moving house.

Contact the schools dept at local council and see where they lead you, trust me they will be able to point you in the right direction and you won't be the first, plenty of women find themselves needing uniform after moves, fleeing abuse, taking on kids from care or relatives and home disasters.

Post on sites and contact the council today

No the important bit is not making OP list everything she could have done differently for the smug amusement of Mumsnetters who aren't in her position.

I would message any mums you know and ask if they are able to give you any old or outgrown shirts/other things you need as you are struggling to afford the things you need. A mum at our school asked around for stuff for her DD. Most people will give it if they have it and I would recommend being fairly blunt about not being able to afford it for all the kids - people are happy to help but usually don’t like the piss taken and you clearly wouldn’t be taking the piss. A woman stole some of my ds clothes once. I would have given her something if she had asked and said she couldn’t afford, but her stealing them was a factor in me cutting contach

The op has already explained that "Ex has left me and isn't paying maintenance as he's unemployed" Presumably she was expecting her ex to contribute to raising his kids which he has now ducked out of

If you contact your local council they may be able to give you some financial aid for things such as this. Lots of people have to do this, my boyfriend when we went to sixth form (college) he got his bus pass paid for as his mum was a single parent and he did not receive any money from his dad.

So check with the college and schools for what they have available to help

OP, there will be clothes for your 10 year old out there 2nd hand, freed up by children who have just gone up to secondary and no longer need their primary jumpers / shirts. Put a post on a local Fb page and see what responses you get.

My KS1 son got told he was having school meals as they were free. I'll talk about packed lunches once I'm paying 32.20 a day for him to scrape them away but whilst they're free, I'm afriad he didn't get the choice. It's in your interests for your younger one to get the free meals whatever his older siblings are doing.