Divorce Help Needed Please

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I want to apply for a divorce on the direct gov website. Funds are tight and I really need to wrap it up for the £550.00 basic.

I have a mortgage with my husband and 2 children. Neither one of us can afford the mortgage alone. If we sell up and rent, my rent would be more than my mortgage is now.

We will need to share the house until one of us meets someone and is in a position to buy the other out etc.

My question is, on what grounds do I choose for divorce if we need to remain in the same house.

He is abusive to me and has been for years. However if I choose these grounds they will say we cannot remain living together. I have no where else to go so really don't see any other option.

Direct gov only gives the following reasons:

Adultery

Unreasonable behaviour
Your husband or wife has behaved in such a way that you cannot reasonably be expected to live with them.

This could include:

physical violence
verbal abuse, such as insults or threats
drunkenness or drug-taking
refusing to pay towards shared living expenses

You’ve been separated for at least 2 years / 5 years

Can I choose unreasonable behaviour but then say for financial reasons we still need to share the house?

Or if I want to divorce due to separation for 2 years - how do you prove you were separated?

Please, any advise welcome.

Thank you.

anyone? : (

The Family Court won’t say anything about who lives where unless you make a separate application. A divorce does not trigger a financial application automatically so put what you like in the petition.

What are the reasons for getting a divorce apart from wanting to get away from him? I know this sounds like a daft question.

I've been where you are but not divorced yet so know it's shite.

Will he agree or contest ? If you choose unreasonable behaviour you have to give examples that he will see (afaik) - will that put you in danger from his anger?

Divorce without a financial order won't protect you from him applying to claim from you financially if he sees fit (although a court would have to grant the application) He can still claim from post divorce unless there is a financial order legally giving you a 'clean break'

Re the two years thing. I was under the impression it had to be at different addresses as it can't be proven.

Although if you apply after 2 years and he doesn't contest I am not sure if any cares where you are living. Someone more knowledgeable needs to confirm

Thank you everyone. It's so complicated.

We have been together for 15 years and married 5.

He has always been controlling and abusive. He calls me names. Constantly thinks i'm hiding something. Creates a massive argument if I go out with work. He doesn't t help with housework even though we both work full time. He lies in every weekend, i'm not allowed a lie in. If i ask for help around the house it results in an argument. He works long hours so even when we are not arguing I am alone.

I have really bad anxiety all the time. It used to be episodes of behaviour like this. He would be ok for a few weeks/months and then it would all kick off and I wouldn't know why. Now it just seems to be most of the time and enough if enough.

In an ideal situation ,he would move out and I would stay in the house with the kids. I really don't know how people do this. I have a good job but could not afford to stay in our house alone, we only bought it 2 years ago.

He has agreed to not contest.

I'm not sure a divorce is going to stop his behaviour though? Sorry if that sounds harsh and I have every sympathy for you but what's the point in spending £550 you don't have on a divorce if you have to remain living together. Put it towards your 'escape' fund instead.

Don't waste your money on a divorce at this stage. You need to work out a plan to split and sell the house. Might be worth talking to Women's Aid.