Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Seeing someone for first time after going NC

14 replies

VLCDoingIt · 26/08/2019 21:31

It's happening soon and I'm just really still angry and hurt.

It's not something I can choose to attend or not. Host would be so upset.

I spoke up about this person's behaviour around their kids and the truth must have hurt as they said some really nasty playground stuff.

Fat, Pig, fat sweaty bitch, nasty c**t. They even repeatedly phoned me to make pig sounds down the phone.

All sorts.

And I am overweight so it's really affected me. I selfharmed after. I really don't want to see them but I have no choice.

I'm just still so mad and upset.

OP posts:
SonEtLumiere · 26/08/2019 21:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pinkdoor · 26/08/2019 21:38

Is the host a good friend? A friend would understand if you explained

MamaOfBothTeams · 26/08/2019 21:40

If they are a good friend/relative then they will understand and not want you to be uncomfortable

I'm sorry the person said that to you Thanks

Original poster
VLCDoingIt · 26/08/2019 21:41

It was about 2 months ago.

But then I feel like I'm letting them win and they get to attend all functions and I don't.

It is a close family member.

OP posts:
Herocomplex · 26/08/2019 21:41

Is it a relative or just someone you know?

Original poster
VLCDoingIt · 26/08/2019 21:41

Host is also a close family member.

OP posts:
Herocomplex · 26/08/2019 21:43

X-post

Herocomplex · 26/08/2019 21:56

The person in question is behaving atrociously, and they clearly know your vulnerabilities. If you’re determined to go I’d recommend you just maintain your distance from them. If they behave badly just quietly say whatever your differences it’s ridiculously rude to ruin someone’s event.

Is the persons behaviour always so dreadful? Did your speaking up have any positive results?

Tigger001 · 26/08/2019 22:31

Do you have someone to go with you for support?

I agree its letting them win by not attending, but if you really cant cope and it would cause you to self harm again then really you are not winning either by going 💐💐💐

pasturesgreen · 26/08/2019 22:50

It's all still very recent and raw, I'd be kind to yourself and not go. I'm sure the host will understand.

Wilmalovescake · 26/08/2019 22:52

I’d let this one go by tbh. Have a stomach bug on the day or something. Two months is nothing. Give yourself time to heal x

Original poster
VLCDoingit · 28/08/2019 18:05

Well I braved it out and came, the offending person found out I was coming and left before I arrived.

Great outcome :)

OP posts:
Original poster
VLCDoingIt · 28/08/2019 18:06

I didn't put a capital in my name. Oops

OP posts:
Wilmalovescake · 28/08/2019 18:19

Brilliant. Well done you.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page