Pre-nup ++

[SweetieDarlings]

I have been asked to sign a pre-nup.

My DP’s family is quite wealthy, and while I’d prefer that I was just trusted (because I’m trustworthy), I can understand why they might want one.

I have now been sent it to review, and it includes a clause whereby in the event of the death of my partner, I would be expected to give any assets deemed to be ‘family money’ back to them (effectively anything without my name on it).

In the case where I had a child, I would still have to return the assets so they could hold them in trust for the child.

Is this a normal part of a pre-nup? It seems Victorian.

DH and I signed one, to protect his assets in event of divorce. I was fine about that - what he owned before I met him isn't something I feel i would have a right over if we split. What we make whilst we're together is shared.

My understanding is that prenups are not legally binding in the UK, but will be taken into account as long as they don't try to do anything unreasonable. They cannot leave either of you without somewhere suitable to live for example.

But I don't understand how a prenup would have any bearing on what happens if either of you die. That's what wills are for.

I think they should be legal here.

It’s not a matter of trust, it’s protecting what you bring to the marriage. I can see why families would want to do that to ensure the money stays within a family. Divorce rates are high so it’s sensible.

I also think there are a good indicator of intentions. I’d want a partner to marry me for love not for my money if in that situation.