What exhausts your toddler more?

[PaulHollywoodsSexGut]

A day at childcare/nursery or a day with immediate family?

DD is 3.5 and is currently having an overturned melt in the bathroom.

DH is adamant that she’s more tired after a day at nursery whereas I think she gets the flattest of batteries after a day with us.

Nothing special, usually something in the morning and something in the afternoon (playgroup and then supermarket) and her siblings are 22mo and 14w but she’s bent double with exhaustion and never ever ever ever ever naps in the day unless driven.

Just wondering if this is the same for other parents of pre schoolers?

Anyone? Man every thread this week...

Mine doesn't go to nursery, sorry! I really do want to help...

Hope someone else comes along soon.

DS is definitely more tired after a day at nursery but he shows the tiredness more when he has days with us.
I put it down to the fact that at nursery he is always under a certain pressure to behave well and to their expectations (which are not high!) whereas at home he knows he can meltdown because he's with us - I don't know how much sense that makes but something like us being his safe place to fully show how he feels so he does! We deliberately try to balance days so he has some quiet down time (he doesn't nap) but it doesn't always work.

I would say nursery as all the social skills are being developed as well as loads of activities but they are usually tired after a day with us also, especially if it's been busy. I don't think there's much in it.

mine is usually more tired the day after busy days. some days she's just tired for no apparent reason, I assume growing.

Usually nursery for us but my inlaws are very outdoorsy so this time of year he is probably most tired after being with them.

Nursery definitely. I agree with pp, the pressure to be good at nursery takes more toll than we realise I think. Ds does tues, weds, thurs at nursery and by Friday he's an emotional wreck, we have to have very low key activities on Fridays as he's so tired from his week at school.

Mine spends 3 days a week at nursery at 2 with family - he is definitely more tired after nursery purely because he doesn't/can't nap for as long. With my family it's generally a slower pace of day and he gets peace and quiet to have proper naps.

Definitely nursery. Both DC are there 8-5 two days a week.

DC1 is 3.3 and pretty sure she's on the go the entire time she's there. Room is free-flow with the garden and they also do lots of activity like dancing and 'jolly joggers' Plus as a PP says, the exhaustion that comes from constant socialising and being on their best behaviour. She sleeps around 13 hours on a nursery night!

We're pretty active at home too and go out every morning, a lot of the time somewhere where she'll be running around or go on a long walk. But we usually have quieter time at home in the afternoon (her little brother naps usually 12-3), reading, craft or quieter play so she gets a bit more downtime.

DC2 (17 months) absolutely exhausted from nursery at the moment as he only started a few weeks ago and is only napping around 40-60 mins there compared to 3 hours at home!

Definitely nursery! When ds1 went, he would be so tired butfine after a day with us.

To be honest as long as mine have their 12 hours sleep at night they don’t really show any tiredness during the day, whatever they’ve been doing. The only time they have tired meltdowns a during the day is when they’ve had a late night the night before, or have woken up in the night for some reason.

You have three very young children, do you find days at home quite stressful or tiring yourself? No judgement at all, I have 4 young DCs and we have plenty of stressful weekend days.

The reason I ask is that my DCs rarely have meltdowns after being tired at nursery or at home - but they do if they've seen us been stressed, or if general family madness has meant they have been (or felt they've been) a bit neglected one day.

We do 'Special Time' with each every day now on the weekend, and find it definitely helps with end of day miseries...

Yes and no @Stuckforthefourthtime

I have to confess I’m no good at crafts and the like and would rather every time piling them in the car and going to the shop or the playground or beach. I find it hard to stay in the house from what is effectively 11.30am as my youngest has a feed then and goes down for her mega nap.

If DS is having a “good nap day” he’s down for 2 hours from 12. After having “lunch time quiet time” with older DD there’s another feed for youngest DD and then it’s 3pm and I’m climbing the walls.

So they’re pretty whacked out by 5pm and bed is at 7pm - that last hour especially on a Saturday is hairy and is peak “shouty mum” time.

I have to say though, since reading that Philippa Perry book I’ve become so much less stressed, shouty and dictatorial, here it is:

www.amazon.co.uk/Book-Wish-Your-Parents-Children/dp/0241250994/ref=nodl_?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

But 5pm on Saturday is still arse hour.