How to get a toddler to eat

[Somerandompersons]

My 2.5 year old eats well at nursery but not at home. At home we are lucky if she has a few mouthfuls for dinner. We normally end up giving cereal for supper so she eats something.

We have tried,
Eating together as a family
Letting her eat alone
Letting her eat in front of tv
No TV
Eating same as us
Giving her her own food
Cutting up food
Giving food whole
Giving one item at a time
Giving every at once.

It's not that she is fussy, it's just she won't eat.

We have the usual she will like food one day then refuse it the next.

Any suggestions? Rapidly running out of ideas.

Thanks

Is she hungry? If she's eating at nursery then she might be having enough to fill her up there. If she's there all day they usually give them tea late afternoon.

What does she eat during the day, before dinner? What do you mean 'supper' - is that right before bed?

Is she growing and thriving and all that? If so, I think it's likely she's just not hungry. I'd try giving a more balanced supper than cereal or vary it a bit, if she's happy to eat at that time. Try a bit of fruit/veg and a sandwich or something. Toast with nut butter, that kind of thing.

I have four children and I've found the best approach is a plate of food in front of them and literally leave them to it.
If they don't eat take it away, say nothing but no more food. If they are hungry later offer them the same dinner if they not want it fine but nothing else.
I've found they soon get the message.
If they are hungry they will eat.

I'm harsh. If they don't eat what I made, fine - but there's the choice of then either reheated dinner, vegetables, or banana. If they go hungry, they go hungry. And repeat.

I'm Scottish so dinner in the main evening meal and supper is before bed.

Normally lunch is early at nursery 11.30-12 and they have an afternoon snack, normally 2.30ish. Dinner will be 5.30-6. Supper would be 7.15 if she doesn't eat much dinner.

We've not actually tried just leaving her to it. We try an encourage and give praise when she eats. She is never told off if she does though.

Might try moving dinner to 6.30-7. Both her dad and me will be home by then each day as well.

And I know she is hungry if she doesn't get supper as she wakes in the milk and asks for milk.

I think what other people have suggested is right. Don't stress or fuss or offer alternative food or offer other places to eat it. She'll pick up on your anxiety and play on it.

Just serve the food when you think best, and accept she'll either eat it or not.

My 18mo doesn’t like breakfast and chucks most of lunch and dinner on the floor. He’s quite sturdy so something must be going in although I feel like he eats nothing.
The only thing I consol myself with is that toddlers won’t starve themselves but nothing useful to add!

It sounds like you are (understandably) a bit concerned about her eating and trying all approaches to try to get her to eat, she might be picking up on this and realising that it gives her a bit of control over mum and dad.
If she has plenty of energy, is growing well and not losing weight, then I would step right back and take all the pressure off of her and yourselves. I would do family mealtimes, put the food in the middle of the table and let everyone serve themselves, don't force her to try anything, don't comment on what she's eating or make a big fuss or praise her when she does eat. You could chat about how much you are enjoying the meal.
You could also get her involved in choosing what she wants to eat for meals (within reason), maybe look at some cookbooks, get her involved in shopping and cooking the food.

She’s not hungry. You appear to be trying to give her two evening meals. My daughter has dinner at 17:30 and nothing more before bed at 19:00. On the rare occasion that she is hungry before bed she has a banana.

Don’t praise eating and don’t put pressure on children to eat. Both of those things lead to unhealthy relationships with food. Just try to give them what you’re eating and at the same time as you’re eating. If they’re not interested then leave it at that. If it’s that they genuinely don’t like the taste (things can taste very different to children - green things can taste quite sour for instance) then offer something else that is quick and simple like cheese on toast.

You seem to be putting a lot of pressure on your child to eat which really isn’t healthy. It sounds like she’s eating well at nursery so give her a break.

Let them help with the cooking too if u can

Could you not give her milk and a biscuit/toast for supper. Then if she wakes, offer her water. Or do you brush her teeth again after the milk?
If she's eating a full meal at 12 and a large snack at 230, she's probably not hungry at 530.

Have you tried shifting the evening meal to 630-7?