Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Anyone else awake?

28 replies

plantwhisperer · 21/08/2019 03:23

Hopefully you're all asleep and cosy, but on the off chance anyone's awake, what's keeping you up?

I'm meeting a friend for lunch tomorrow which I'm really looking forward to but I feel nervous about it! They're a newer friend so I still get anxious that they won't want to see me anymore. Feeling restless and sick right now!

OP posts:
whatisit12345 · 21/08/2019 03:27

There is nothing to worry about! They are probably excited to meet you and looking forward to it. Have a great day tomorrow !

lboogy · 21/08/2019 03:29

You'll be fine. They wouldn't want to meet you if you weren't already a great company. Stop worrying about it. I hope you have a great time x

BackInAtLast · 21/08/2019 03:30

I'm awake...on hols alone and can't sleep!

Try to remember your new friend wanted to meet you in the first place...maybe it will be you that isn't sure after this meeting also...? Either way, try to just go with an open mind and have a lovely lunch.

Do you think it's general anxiety or is it only with this friend...?

Original poster
plantwhisperer · 21/08/2019 03:32

Thanks everyone! I know I'm being silly about it, I just get so insecure when I meet people! I do have diagnosed anxiety so that probably contributes 

@BackInAtLast ooh away anywhere nice?

OP posts:
Tarchie · 21/08/2019 03:37

Hi Plant, I’m sorry that you can’t sleep. I’m struggling myself and keep telling myself that I’ll be so tired in the morning but this just makes it even harder to fall asleep! My mind is just racing with lots of things, mainly worries about my DCs. It’s lovely to hear your plans for a lunchtime meet up with your friend, I’m sure you’ll have a great time. Please try not to worry about whether they’ll want to see you again, keep reminding yourself of all the wonderful things you are that make you YOU. 💐 for feeling anxious and let us know how your lunch goes.
Try to settle down to sleep, or even just rest quietly. Deep breathing works brilliantly I’ve found and some grounding techniques where you think of 5 things that you can see, 4 that you can hear, 3 that you can smell, 2 that you can taste and 1 thing that you can feel. It works because it distracts your mind from your current thoughts. Anything’s worth a try.

Original poster
plantwhisperer · 21/08/2019 03:39

@Tarchie What a lovely message, thank you!Thanks I have heard of the grounding technique before so I'll definitely give that a go!

I'm so sorry to hear you're up worrying too, it's awful isn't it! Looks like we'll both be needing the coffee tomorrow.BrewBrew

OP posts:
BackInAtLast · 21/08/2019 03:43

Housesitting in Spain ❤️ but worrying about some things back home. I thought I'd cracked some of my sleep problems...but clearly not?! I hope you can get back to sleep...have you tried mindfulness? There are good sleep meditations on the Insight Timer app..am going to do one myself 🤗

Tarchie · 21/08/2019 03:44

Definitely will need some coffee tomorrow Plant!! Anxiety is awful, I’ve recently been prescribed beta blockers for the physical symptoms which has helped slightly but it obviously doesn’t take away the psychological strain of anxiety. Do you have a good support network around you?

Whattodo20192 · 21/08/2019 03:49

I've just done a night feed, baby is drifting off back to sleep. I have a night planned away tonight (wednesday), it's been planned for 9 months and now I suddenly don't want to go Sad

Tarchie · 21/08/2019 03:50

Sorry, I pressed send too early!! That’s insomnia for you!! I’ve found the Calm app quite helpful, they have something called sleep stories which can be nice to listen to and are designed to help you relax and hopefully drift off. Sometimes just getting out of bed for a short while also breaks the cycle. You sound lovely though, even at this hour(!) and I’m sure your friend is very lucky to have found you. Please don’t doubt yourself. Look at some of the drawings by Charlie Mackesy, I hope I’ve spelt that correctly, but they are really encouraging and comforting.

Lemonysherbet · 21/08/2019 03:53

Pregnancy wees woke me up!

@plantwhisperer huge anxiety sufferer here, overthinker and general self doubter. You are worthy of being liked , you need to tell yourself that. They wouldn't have made plans with you otherwise. I do the same thing though. So easy to beat yourself up and tell yourself why you don't deserve these things, but you do

Original poster
plantwhisperer · 21/08/2019 03:53

@Whattodo20192 oh no! What do you think has changed your mind? It sounds like a lovely treat away from home, nice rest for you.Thanks

OP posts:
Original poster
plantwhisperer · 21/08/2019 03:55

@Tarchie Thank you so much! I don't have many friends and always struggle to fit into new friendship groups as I'm such an introvert! I judge myself so harshly it's ridiculous!

You're right about breaking the cycle, sometimes when I have bad panic attacks at night I go and sit in the lounge and look out the window, nice change of scenery and a bit of private for myself so calm down!

OP posts:
Original poster
plantwhisperer · 21/08/2019 03:56

@Lemonysherbet congratulations! How far along are you?

It's awful isn't it! I feel even more anxious as I was the one to invite her out this time so I keep thinking she just said yes out of pity.Sad

OP posts:
wizzler · 21/08/2019 04:03

I'm awake, thinking about work stuff.

I try to distract myself by imagining a new pet, say a really cute kitten and then thinking of a name for him that starts with an "a", than "b".. and go through the alphabet. I find it helps as it focuses my brain a bit.

Seahorseshoe · 21/08/2019 04:05

I have anxiety too. The body wants to sleep but the brain decides to run a marathon.

I've found that, giving in to things that cause anxiety, feeds the cycle. The more you do something, the easier it gets. Avoiding these situations is the worse thing you can do - so kudos to you for arranging it too!

You deserve to enjoy your lunch and your friend's company - and so does she for having a friend like you. You are worthy and I'm sure, tomorrow night, you'll be glad you went.

I hope that makes sense, I'm feeling droopy now.

Hope you have a lovely day.

Tarchie · 21/08/2019 04:06

Oh you poor thing Plant to have such self-doubt. I’m the same and really just have my family for company. It’s so hard isn’t it when we think so little of ourselves? But your friend is the lucky one, sharing your company tomorrow. Let us know how it goes.....in between caffeine fixes of course. 😄

Tarchie · 21/08/2019 04:09

What lovely advice from Wizzler and Seahorse for ways to tackle anxiety. Even in the small hours, it’s really comforting to know that other people understand and can offer encouragement. 💐to us all.

Lemonysherbet · 21/08/2019 04:10

@plantwhisperer thank you. 5 weeks and it's my first so it's all very new to me!

Ahh yes, I get the ramped up anxiety in that case if you did the asking. But they accepted so please be kind to yourself about it. Since going through CBT the one thing I took away is to actually tell the negative person in my mind to f off a lot more. She will always be in there but shes not listened to half as much now! It's less exhausting

Salene · 21/08/2019 05:06

My 5 year old got in my bed and peed it , I just woke up soaking, he hasn't done that for a couple of years , he is starting school in morning so wondering if he is worried. He is back to sleep and I'm now wide awake.

indisposed38 · 21/08/2019 05:10

Woke up with back ache which feels more like my kidneys. So worrying I have kidney problem. Also thinking about work stuff. Planning our camping trip in my head what we need to take etc. 101 things that means my brain doesn't shut off! Arghh! Drinking camomile tea now.

indisposed38 · 21/08/2019 05:11

@Salene oh bless. It's a big stress on them isn't it?

sashh · 21/08/2019 05:25

Morning, I'm taking orders for coffees in the sashh cafe, I might be persuaded to also make tea.

Lemonysherbet · 21/08/2019 05:28

I'll take a tea please!

sashh · 21/08/2019 05:52

One rea on its way, with milk and sugar?

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.