So stressed and overwhelmed by work

[WhatNoNotYouAgain]

NC for obvious reasons.

I work in operations management for a small non profit. My role is home based so it's really great childcare wise as have young DC and though they're in childcare I can have them at home when ill etc and it's really easy and non stressful doing drop off/pick up. Have a lot of flexibility in general. So that aspect is absolutely brilliant and I know I'm much luckier than lots of others.

But I am so stressed. I am completely snowed under, 100% of the time and constantly feel like I am being reactive rather than proactive as there are so many things to get on top of. The CE is pretty incompetent and loads of things are done in a very haphazard fashion at the last minute which I absolutely hate. I work a four day week but I am constantly doing over and above that and because I work from home it's really hard to escape and switch off. I cannot keep on top of my inbox, I cannot keep on top of anything and I feel like I'm not doing a good job.

I don't know what the point to this post is really, I just wanted to offload and to see if anyone else is in a similar situation? If it wasn't for the flexibility this role offers I would leave, but I don't think I will find what I've got now (in terms of flexi) anywhere else. I have a seizure condition triggered by crowds so physically travelling into an office has always been pretty hard for me (I live in london). I don't feel I can give up being home based. But equally I don't want to be utterly stressed all the time and constantly worrying about work.

Can you ask for a meeting to discuss this? It sounds like you're doing more than one person's job.

Are you trying to work school hours when it’s actually 4 full days?
If so; then you need to sort that and create some firm boundaries.

You need to talk to your boss about this. What other solution do you think there could be?

companies take the piss for as long as you are willing to do the extra work without pay. Raise concerns about the work load, have it documented and then stop working so much out of hours, when work doesnt get completed then they have no one to blame but themselves. Sounds like they need additional staff

hello OP, I'm in a slightly similar in that I am a freelancer working from home as a LP around my young DD. It's hard and I never seem to get on top of everything.

Few suggestions:

• use the Pomodoro technique for time management, short bursts of focussed attention (25 minutes) then breaks doing something completely different (e.g. go stretch your legs, or for a walk, or do a household task for just 5 minutes). This helps you remain at optimal productivity, it is well worth giving it a go and googling it.

• if you are able, work outside of the house e.g. coffee shop or library - once in a while. I find this resets my productivity, I now rent a hot desk in a coworking space which really helps me focus when I need to. It's a lovely place with no pressure like an office, quiet, calm and away from the housework. It might be worth you trying something like this to see if it helps. I felt totally different after I decided to separate work from home a bit more. Appreciate you said an office might not be for you but i you find the right space it may help.

• definitely speak to your boss, ask for backup if you need it (some extra hands on deck). you shouldn't feel like this. You need better boundaries. All overtime must be paid. Set available hours only, work phone separate to your personal and turned off when you're not working.

• if there are tasks you hate doing and put off I suggest using small chunks often e.g. doing your accounts in five minute bursts each day - this is much more manageable than putting it off for weeks only to face an intimidating mountain. You could also schedule in a 25 minute pomodoro - short enough to get a little done but not so much time that you feel like nothing else

• inbox zero technique - I use my inbox to run my life, archive all messages as soon as actioned, have a "pending" or project folders that get archived as soon as they are done. So you can only see the tasks that need doing in front of you. Lifesaving.

• calendar reminders emailed to you (Google calendar) to keep you on top of things as they come up

• admit defeat if you're not coping. Can you scale back your hours at all or look for something else? You don't want to ruin your health over it. Something else will come up!

No I'm not working school hours. My DC are in childcare. I'm working normal office hours.

Oh and it's a charity. The concept of paid overtime just doesn't exist. We get TOIL but that just makes me more stressed as when have I got the time to take it?!

I've spoken to both the CE and members of the board about it all, multiple times, and no one seems to listen. I'm used, in a small organisation like this, to the CE taking a lot more responsibility and having much more oversight of operational processes, but she isn't remotely interested. It all gets left to me, and yet I do not have the authority to sign anything off as we are so small, so there's a huge bottleneck.

I do some work at home for my own business and also for a small charity. Things I find help:-

• lists, I literally write down all the things that need done and assign a time to them (ie book out space in my diary marked to do x) when I run out of time I go back and ask the organisation how they want me to prioritise the work.

• I have an office space that I only use for work. At the end of the day I close the door and stop. No going back to do one last email, no checking one last thing, no calls outside my working time. Be super disciplined about starting and finishing times.

• if someone gives me something too late for a deadline, again I’ll check what they want me to leave to get the thing done at short notice. Your CE there to take responsibility I’d be pushing back stuff that needs done that you’re not authorised to or that needs sign off that you can’t give.

Simply put, the more you accommodate their lack of organisation the more stressed you’ll be. The more you work over your hours, the more it masks their need for more resources and you continue to be under pressure.

• really attend to your own self care, take breaks, have a cup of tea away from your desk, go out for lunch etc. Home working can be way more intense than going out to work because you don’t have colleagues to chat to, or a clear lunch break etc so give yourself permission to ease up a bit from time to time.

Last thing, I get the benefits of flexible working, many unreasonable workplaces keep people tied in by accommodating child care etc. There are other jobs out there though that will offer home working, minimal travel etc that won’t pressure you like this. Start looking, even if you ultimately decide not to leave, don’t be cornered into thinking you’ve got such a good thing flexibility wise that no one else would want you or offer you similar support.