Argh they are driving us mad!! Pester power / kids nagging

[FusionChefGeoff]

We are on holiday on a campsite. Kids are VERY excited and want to do absolutely everything this minute, right now and me and DH are losing our shit at the constant barrage of requests.

We have tried writing a list of things they want to do to reassure them it will all get done eventually which helped a bit but still now it's like a loop.

We tried saying every time you ask if we're going to the pool / mini golf now (whilst we are sorting bags etc) its an extra minute we will wait.

We tried just talking and explaining that it takes a bit is time between activities and they just need to chill the fuck out (obvs without the swears) but they're still bugging us!!

Any other strategies / tips / general advice??

How old are they?

We used to divide and conquer. One of us take kids to pool while other unpacks. That sort of thing. It can be impossible to set up camp with kids hopping around like eager puppies.

Oops 7 and 4

I tell them we’re doing X and this time, show them on a clock face and tell them that we won’t be leaving til the clock is at the right time.

I also say if they keep asking, they’re not busy enough and I’ll give them a job to do. We also divide and conquer, so only one of us is driven crazy at once. And sometimes I just loose my shit and they know they’ve gone too far.

Ignore, or get them to help out with packing their stuff or sit down for 1 minute every time they pester you. Show them the wasted time.

To play devil's advocate though, are you both taking an exceptionally long time to get out? I recently went on holiday with some lovely people but they were total faffers and took forever to get ready to go anywhere. We stopped waiting for them in the end as our kids were climbing the walls waiting - as were we! Their poor kids seemed really fed up. I'm not sure why it took them all 3 hrs to get out in the morning...

Ignore them or give them a job to do so you can go out quicker giving them explanations and lists is just giving them negotiating room children need short instructions not long winded explanations

Set an alarm on your phone (I use Alexa at home). Let them know you'll be going to to activity when the alarm goes off.

Or make them calm down and do a quiet activity colouring/tablet/read for half an hour before you take them anywhere.

Simple we try not to faff but I'm sure that for a 4 year old we take an age! We could definitely try to get a bit more ahead of ourselves- were very organised at home but trying to relax a bit on holiday seems to be backfiring!!

Have divided now so I'm getting kit ready ( and a coffee and MNetting!) whilst DH is 'supervising' the first attempt at kids club so hopefully that should remove a flash point later!

They are also constantly nagging us about spending they holiday money as PILs save coins all year and have given them 60 Euro each!! We are really struggling to find a balance of letting them do what they want with it as it's their treat money - but then it would be gone on campsite plastic shit vending machines in 2 days. So get stuck in a feast and famine cycle of saying 'yes it's your money you spend it but when it's gone it's gone' but then intervening as we see another 10 euro smashed in 5 minutes and refusing to let them spend any more!!

Arghhhhhhh!!

Just to add, at home, I generally feel pretty confident in our parenting, it seems to work most of the time and I rarely lose my shit. But it's all gone to pot now we're all together for 2 weeks

Oh phone alarms is a great one yes I use those at home to get out on time but it's a good way to signal time to wait to them too.

Draw out a timetable? Morning/afternoon/evening for each day. Then all sit round and choose things you want to do and take it in turns to put things on the timetable. You could also put the spending money on - say €5 each per day for example and cross it off each morning when you hand it out. Nice big letters and clear for all to see so they’re not concerned you’ll forget or fob them off. Also put in some downtime/relaxing periods (“card games in the tent” for example) for your own sanity.

Bunch of fives?

In terms of spending money I’d give them a small daily allowance to spend on plastic shit, with the bulk of money set aside for a treat day or trip or some such. Yes it’s their money but a lesson in budgeting, pacing yourself is no bad thing.

Isn’t it funny how our well established parenting confidence goes out the window with a change in scenery.

Can you leave them at the kid’s club, is it like a Eurocamp type place with organised activities?
Then at least you and your DH would have a break.

Just toughen up, make it clear that if they keep nagging/pestering they will miss the special activity and you will be going for a long hike (or whatever doesn’t appeal) - and stick to your threat.

Placemarking for holiday tips. You have my sympathy OP, we are on holiday and struggling with similar issues. Both kids arguing so much more than at home!

YY divide the spending money up. Give them an amount they are allowed to fritter (divide by day prob at those ages, if older you could give them the lot at once), keep an amount to pay for treats like entrance to amusement park or ice creams or whatever, and make specific trip to "souvenir" tat shop with extra £5 to spend + any they have saved from "frittering" fund plus can keep the £5 if don't spend it.

If they are currently under the impression they will be going on a shopping spree with £60 get them involved in the decision of what to spend the "events" portion of the money on so they don't feel cheated.

Thank you thank you thank you wise mumsnetters you have given me back my confidence that this isnt going to be an unmitigated disaster and my kids aren't destined to be forever horrible little shits

Timetable work in progress now for them to fill in some gaps over dinner then we will also change down the money and explain that system too.

And YES it's a 'leave them to it' kids club so after we've done a couple of settling in ones (trying to suss our which staff speak English and sticking with them basically!) hopefully a break for a bit every day will make it all much easier.