Computers and boys socialising

[typewrriter12]

I am pretty new to MN and rarely start a thread. But i am pissed off with being made to feel like a crap parent. The issue is my 13 year old son does not want to socialise out of school, he does not do sports has no interest in joining music type groups. He will not go to the shops on his own. But he chats online and plays games on line with friends he has a large group of friends at school and gets on well with teachers. So my question is basically why are people trying to make out my child is not normal and even if he isn't why should he have to conform. Thanks

should i move this thread to AIBU

If he is happy in his life I see no issues at all. Sounds like a 'normal' kid to me.

Sound perfectly normal for a 13 year old. My DD rarely goes out and happy to be on computer and being online with her friends. When I was 13 I was hanging about street corners but the lives of teenagers is so different from years past

Normal - unfortunately.

Normal.

Why won't he go to the shops on his own?

My Ds is 13 and likes activities like listening to music and only goes out with his friends at had-term/holidays really. (He walks home with his friends from school which I assume is a sort of social activity as they dawdle and chat rather than come straight back)

Although having said that, I do insist on a bit of sport/cooking/dog-walking to break the monotony.

Why won't he go to the shops on his own?

If he is anything like my DD it will be cos he's a lazy article!

Glad I saw this. I'm always giving my son a hard time for not getting out the house.

My DS is exactly the same unfortunately.

My DS was like that at that age. About 16-17 they started going out.

I think it’s a vicious circle with boys.

There seems to be current thinking that boys play computer games and all their socialising is done via online games. I’ve seen many parents buying their boys consoles as they feel they are being left out socially by not having one.

That means boys are online, so actual activities and in person gatherings are less attended. So boys don’t want to go, so they sit online with their friends...

Girls don’t play computer games, obvs. Parents don’t buy girls consoles so they use social media and are more likely to meet up in person.

Further gender stereotyping.

So o/p it’s likely none of his friends get out and about socialising either. So why would he go? I think online socialising for boys is (sadly, imo) becoming the norm.

Girls don’t play computer games, obvs. Parents don’t buy girls consoles so they use social media and are more likely to meet up in person.

My 13 year old DD has spent the last 5 weeks playing on her Xbox with boys and girls as well as being on social media and has met up with her friends (again boys and girls) once

It was sarcasm @stooriehouse

Again though, i should remember to include my caveat that I’m speaking generally, on a population level, before someone comes along and says ha! My personal experience is the opposite therefore you are wrong!!

Was your bit about girls and computer games was sarcasm and the rest of your post wasn't ? My apologies

Thank you so much for all your replies. Yes my son is happy just playing on his computer. similar to what a previous poster said my childhood was spent hanging round the streets. He does suffer with anxiety so i think that is why he does not want to go to the shops although he has told me he will do it when he is ready

He sounds exactly like my 13 year old DD who will quite happily spend 12 hours a day on Minecraft. I turf her out with me once or twice a week and she has a friend over today, but that's only the second time she's seen someone this holiday. I figure it's only for the duration of the school holidays.

@StoorieHoose
sorry for mentioning boys only it is because i only have a son and just wanted advice on boys and computers

Sorry my post was to another post was to another poster not you