DS turns 5 on Sunday.
He's a good kid overall. He is kind, uses his manners and loves unconditionally. He's funny and has a wicked sense of humour.
He is hard work. He is headstrong. He is independant. He is argumentative and sometimes, as stupid as it sounds... i feel he "picks on me"
He knows I will do anything for him, sometimes against my own judgment, for an easy life. I know he is pushing boundaries.
He has never needed us to stay with him when he goes to sleep. Ever. A few months back he asked me to sit with him. I did. We're still doing it months later. In the grand scheme it's no big deal.
But for me, he talks, he messes about, tells me 1001 things he could have told me during the day. Bedtime takes an hour at times. I remind him it's bedtime and time to sleep. I even say, and carry my action out, that I will get up and leave him if he doesn't settle down.
His room is directly next to the nlounge so we're not even 3 meters from him and he insists I sit with him.
For his Dad, he will talk a little then sleep.
I feel like it's a constant battle.
My husband says I always argue with DS. I have found myself feeling like DS goes on and on at me. And also feeling a little aggrieved. I will come in after they have had a day together and it will start as soon as i walk in the door. DS will start kicking off, moaning, or crying or mithering.
I think DH is beginning to see it's not ALL me.
I appreciate DH stepping in and taking control of things but I feel sometimes like it's never ending and soul destroying.
I guess I just feel like the shitty parent. I've made decisions that now, like sitting with him as he asked us to do, is coming to bite me on the arse.
Not sure what the point of this post is really.
I just wish DS was easier. That I wasnt the parent who he creates for and that makes me feel like shit.
I made him. I have taught and nutured him. This is my own doing.