Hi. Looking for some advice please. I have 3 stepchildren , dsd is 11, dss1 who is coming up 10, and dss2 who is 6 and a half. Dh and I have been together 5 and a half years. I also have a ds, who is almost 9, from my first marriage.
We have dsc eow and 1 night in the week, this was working out OK except occasionally the kids, especially dss2, would say that he prefers it at his dms house and ask when he was going home. Once, dsd refused to get out of the car. Their dm is no help in these situations, just stands there smirking and makes no encouragement to go with dh.
More recently, dss1 said that he hates it here, apparently because their dm doesn't limit his screen time, as we do, and doesn't withdraw screen time for bad behaviour, which we also do. DSs2 made a huge display the other day of not wanting to come, "I hate daddy" etc, hitting and biting dh and struggling to get to his dm.
My dsc are screen obsessed and I wonder if a lot of it is to do with that. But it's getting us down. Dh seems resigned to it, but I hate it. They're always happy as anything when they are with us, and never mention their dm.
Their dm is very high conflict , the dsc are not allowed to mention me or dh to her, and the other day my dm was looking after dsd and dss1 and dsd threw a fit because she was worried her dm might see my dm, and be mad because she's my dm.
I told dh he needs to tell the dsc that this behaviour is hurtful. He isn't sure. Does anyone else deal with stuff like this?
*disclaimer - no I was not ow, they split up just before she found out she was pg with dss2**