Cocaine Valium addicted ex wants access

[Happy543]

Hi I’m looking for some advise regarding drug addiction

The day I gave birth to my baby my bf went missing for days. Cut s long story short he was out for days taking cocaine and Valium. He was having psychosis and imagining wild things which was terrifying. I had just had a csevtion and had a 5 year old also. I had to move out of our home with them both becAuse it was so bad. Anyway he ended up having a bad fall due to the psychosis and we had to pay private for rehab. He went for a month things seemed fine. I eased contact back on with the kids and myself everything was great we started being together more and then I found a tablet on the floor. Contact was stopped and he started taking drug tests. He told his mum I witnessed these and told me his mum did so to be fair we don’t actually know if they were passed but I have only recently found this out. After that he replaces s again and there has been a million more times I’ve tried to help and he’s done it again or I’ve found them in pockets. Then he got clean for months started again to build the trust up when I let him take the older child out to the shop, I haven’t let him have any unsupervised contact but when he came back he was very weird and I caught him trying to hide a big bag of tablets upstairs. He had took my child to pick them up. Confronted him and he wrecked the house in front of the kids. Went on a bender for a week was in the street hallucinating, the neighbours called me. I don’t like with him anymore. So now he wants contact and because I am now standing my ground and saying no he wants to go to court. He also googled how to fake a drugs test and I caught him taking one in warm water. What will happen at court I am terrified a judge believes his lies. He has no family left no one because of the way he is now but he hides it from everyone else and puts on a big show. He has also sent me many many nasty messages calling me and the kids all sorts he has threw out things out the room windows he has threatened to blow him house up there is so much he is a horrible person. This has went on a gets now and I have always tried to help him but it’s came to a point he is now putting the kids in danger so I am not willing to let them near him.

So sorry for the long post X

Can I also add he is in 50000 of debt over 5 years and last year before rehab we had to pay 10000 because he crashed two cars and had drug debts

Did you save the messages?

Going via court, you will get good advice. I'd say he wont be allowed access until he can provide clean hair strand tests and all contacts he has with you can be shown to the court.

Keep any messages he sends you, although it will be stressful, call his bluff and tell him your also willing to go to court. I very much doubt he will be able to cheat the drugs checks, they will be designed by people who are aware how much drug addicts will try to lie/cheat I assume. With his history I doubt the court would rule in his favour, aside from that I'd go to the police and tell them about his threats to your and your kids lives.

Yeah I have every message he has sent me over the last year X

All these abusive men threaten to get custody, it's just what they say to terrify you so you will try to keep them sweet to protect the children. From what you've said he has absolutely no chance of even having unsupervised contact. If he threatens you again please log it with the police, this will create a paper trail that will be really useful to present to the judge if he does take you to court.

Keep all the threatening messages, maybe save a copy of them somewhere else (Dropbox and/or your laptop) in case you lose your phone.

If he comes to your house don't open the door to him, call the police. He sounds terrifying and hopefully you will be able to get a non-molestation order against him so he will be legally bound to stay away from you.

Good luck Happy453 this must be scary for you, but you sound like a good mother. Protect yourself and your children.