Children on devices too much?

[tabuladubia]

I was on a domestic flight recently and there were six children, from three families, sitting round me. Children were aged between about 2 and 8. For the duration of the flight (less than an hour) each of the children was plugged in to a tablet.

I don't know their circumstances and maybe the children were tired/stressed about flying/noisy etc. But everywhere you look there are small children sitting in front of a phone or a tablet. At restaurants, waiting rooms, while they are being pushed in their buggies...

I can't believe it's good for their eyes, their language skills, or their brain development. It's certainly more peaceful for those around them (as long as they are using headphones).

I didn't have a smartphone or a tablet when my DC were tiny so I never got in the habit of entertaining them that way. Maybe my instinct is wrong and it's absolutely fine. What does everyone else think?

It's not just children. Its adults too.

I'd rather another child was quietly on a device than upsetting my child by being too noisy or running about.

Parents simply can’t win. Plug child into a tablet for a long journey and you’re ruining their eyes/stunting their development. Let them make a noise/roam around and you’re creating a nuisance for other passengers. Talk to them/interact with them and you’re ‘performance parenting’. I’m sick of it.

We did a 5.5-hour train journey yesterday with our DD aged nearly four, and yes she was watching things on the iPad most of the time. She did a bit of colouring/stickers as well, but she doesn’t yet have the attention span to do it for long. Presumably this makes me a shit parent and I should have kept her entertained with a stimulating programme of educational activities (but not too loudly to avoid the dreaded performance parenting 🙄).

Adult posts on the internet to complain that children spend too much time on the internet.

I agree with a pp, kids are either criticised for spending too much time playing xbox and PlayStation or they're criticised for being out roaming the streets, and being on their phones.

I've got 2 teenagers and I've never really limited their device/internet time, and between work/school, sports activities and hanging out with their mates they spend less time on their devices than I do.

I agree with @bookworm14 people can’t win. I would rather my son was watching something than causing a problem . All I do on the plane is watch films.

I have never limited my sons screen time. He is now 15. He got bored and came off when he was bored. Now he goes out with his friends and plays online with them. It has never really bothered me. I spent hours on the computer when they first came out with my sister. And I remember having a fab time.

Actually kids YouTube and an iPad were the reason my 2 year old could say the alphabet, knew his shapes and knew his colours.

I agree with you OP that in general kids spend too much time on devices. I don't think there's anything wrong with playing on a device in itself, but it's inevitably at the expense of time spent reading or being active or interacting socially.

However, I think a flight is a bad example to use. That is the perfect time to give a child a device and keep them quiet and busy so they don't disturb other passengers. Even families with quite strict rules around screen time will often relax them when travelling.

I think tablets are a useful tool and sometimes it’s ok to parent in a less than perfect way. My 6 year old this week has had one operation, one trip to A+E as febrile, a CT, an MRI and a PET scan. All 60 miles from home. We are all exhausted. She has spent a lot of time on screens. Right now you would probably look at us very critically as she is playing on the iPad and we are both on phones as we wait for the next scan. It’s working for us and getting us through the days.

Mine have minimal screen time generally and I agree some children seem to watch screens a lot but a plane is a time I absolutely will let them watch something, my dd has headphones that she’s only allowed on aeroplanes as it’s the only time she she’s allowed SkyGo! They’ve often been up ridiculously early for the flight and then have been hanging around at the airport for hours, why not watch a film for a couple of hours and make it more peaceful for surrounding passengers than a 2hour game of eye spy as is her activity of choice in the car!

Mine aren’t allowed on tablets/ phones with the exception of flights. It’s the best way to keep them occupied in the interests of other passengers. The youngest 2 can’t read well enough to keep it up for hours yet, and unlike on car journeys they can’t pass the time spotting things out the window etc. A flight is not indicative of how they spend time normally.

Hmm the evidence on screens so far is not conclusive on whether kids go on screens too much.

What is more definite is that people go on flights too much. What were you doing on the aeroplane anyway? It's a very destructive way to travel.

What else is there to do on a plane or train?

I did regular long haul with my kids (lived abroad) when they were little, and it was really hard to keep them entertained on a flight! I remember walking up and down the aisle a thousand times am sure other passengers would have preferred them to be on a tablet!

There was a programme on bbc a few months ago that looked at kids that used tablets compared to kids that didn't , the kids that used tablets and phones could stack blocks higher, draw near perfect circles and few other things that showed they had much better hand eye coordination than kids that had no access to devices .

On a long haul flight DD watches the on board entertainment for the majority of the flight. So do I. There's not much else to do and we've usually spent up to 6 hours beforehand on a car, getting through security and the airport etc after an early morning that none of us have the brainpower to do much else.

I bet you're the sort of person that complains about crying babies on flights too.

Every example there you have given is a bad example.

Sometimes, kids wont give in buggy and you need to bloody do something.

Flights, waiting rooms or restaurants....would you prefer small children running about? They have a short attention span.
You can bet people would be giving the parents dirty looks if the kids were being kids and noisy.

My ds 8 had 3 hours of screen time yesterday. He got up and had breakfast went on it for an hour while I did some bits around the house. Then we went to a craft morning, at a local family pub. He did that for about 45 mins with friends and then played in the play area. We had lunch and cane home. He had about 45 mins on it after lunch. Then we went to the park for the afternoon, again with friends, it rained we went to my friends where they all played together on mine craft.

Then home, dinner, bed.

You can go on tablets and do lots of other things too.

We regularly used to do 18 hrs of travel to get back to the UK - approx every 9 months. Those hours were total unlimited screen time, except for a forced sleep for DS1 (DS2 would just drop off, but big brother wouldn't). Flights are the ONLY time that level of screens were permitted. It is hellish enough as an adult. Screens made it bearable for them and me.
We dont do screens in the car. We most certainly dont do screens at the table. They didn't possess a screen when they were preschool age. Flights are a whole different kettle of fish.

There’s definitely a difference in kids having screen time every hour of the day rather than being engaged with by their parents. You can see speech development is delayed and their inability to interact with their peers.

I do t believe having screen time on long journeys or even for an hour on a place is detrimental. It’s not very day and to be honest it’s there to mitigate any issues which could impact other passengers too and try and help comfort the child.

Totally fine. Exceptions made here for long journey. You are judging on a snapshot of time. They maybe never get it usually.

In saying that we have never used screens in restaurants, waiting rooms or buggies. My DC are up for 13 hours a day. If they have an hour or two screen time and are doing other activities the other 11-12 hours I really can't get too excited about it. There are some dvantages to using screens, hand eye coordination, educational apps and tv programmes like number blocks and where in the world.

Mine only ever get devices on flights and that's just to watch a downloaded movie. They are 8,6 and 3yrs.
Pretty much screen free otherwise. Don't think you can judge so quickly op.

Good point from deplorabelle. If you want to retain the moral high ground, OP, maybe you'd like to explain why you're happy to continue flying when we know how destructive it is?

Wow a lot of defensiveness on this thread!

Point taken about flights being a reasonable time for kids to be on screens. Though on the (only) two occasions I’ve taken my dc on flights they were fine without devices.

I’m not going to indulge the whataboutery of me being on a plane. I was asking for opinions on children’s use of tablets, which I’ve got. Thanks!

Hope the article you're writing goes well OP x