Things I can do too boost self esteem and make myself feel happier

[lotsofquestion]

Just as the title says really! Going through a pretty rubbish break up, I feel at an all time low and like I'm struggling so I want some ideas of what I can do to pick myself back up again!! Some nights I'll be stuck at home which is when I'm struggling the most, some nights I might be able to go out.

EX hopefully will have the kids one overnight and then 2 evenings after school and I will ask him to bring them back here to bed too while I do something for myself (since he can't have them overnight yet as he's at his mums)

Ideas I thought of for going out..

Walking the poor neglected dog!
Joint the local gym, gym, swim and sauna!
Meet a friend
Join some kid of club and meet new people - ideas welcome!!

Ideas for staying in...

Friends have brought me lots of books to keep me busy so read
Watch a series on TV
Avoid phone time as much as possible
Pamper evening - face mask and nails etc.
Clean the house!
Organise stuff
Learn a new skill?? - again ideas welcome

When I have to manage my depression and anxiety I stick just dance on you tube and go mad dancing to all manner of cheesey , daft songs. When I'm alone of course! Lifts the spirits. Particularly fond of a bit of 90s dance on there.
Joining the gym sounds a great idea too x

Your lists are good.
I could add that it may help self esteem if you learn something...online free courses, or a language which you can do at home.

Also some volunteering somewhere, somehow which will bring you in touch with people? Helping at the school, listening to children reading, helping on school trips etc.

Do something new...write a journal, write poetry, start knitting, make greetings cards, learn a musical instrument, go to a dancing class. W.I. Even join a church going to coffee mornings etc. Buy a bike, go cycling. Start gardening, or growing veg. Do some baking etc. etc. Have a friend over for a meal/chat/film. Plan days out with the children. Plan a holiday. Go to the cinema.

And take that lovely dog out for more walks! I wish I had one.

Local pub quiz. Get to know your neighbours. If you are going to be a single mum, having an emergency contact next door your dcs can go to if you are ill, is a good idea.
Also nice for feeling like you belong.

Getting out everyday and appreciating your surroundings is good and most dog walkers are very friendly.
I think laughter is great watch something that makes you laugh or smile a comedy a film and spend more time with people who bring you up and help you feel better about yourself and who don’t take themselves too seriously.
Have you ever tried laughter yoga? That is good fun basically you fake laughter and real laughter erupts and you feel all the benefits of having had a good laugh.
Learning a new skill sounds good what are you interested in or what did you used to enjoy? Lots of short classes are often on at local centres. I have recently joined a dressmaking class and really enjoy the satisfaction of making clothes that fit me (and the satisfaction of saying thank you I made it myself when someone admires it) as well as having a natter and the friendships I enjoy with people from the class of all ages and from all walks of life.

I faced my life long fear of heights, falling and hurting myself (always been a physical coward) and took up Parkour lessons. I've always admired people who do physical things like this and, in my head, have always had a fantasy me who is amazing at stuff like that. I just thought, sod it, I'm middle aged - I'll be dead soon, I'm going to give this a go.

And I love it! I'm bloody bad at it but everytime I manage to do something I previously thought was impossible for me I feel utterly awesome.

So my advice is face a fear - something you have always kinda wanted to do/be that person, but thought you couldn't or weren't. You'll feel amazing when you realise you can do things you always told yourself you couldn't!

Your list sounds good.
If you find it difficult to motivate yourself to actually do the things, rather than procrastinate and 'waste' the time, then i find arranging to do things with a friend means that i will stick to it. So, e.g. going to the gym, i would find an excuse not to do this, but if I'd arranged to meet a friend there, then i would make sure i went.
The other thing that helped my self esteem was when i 'Marie Kondoed' my clutter. She says in her book, that often, the act of working out what sparks joy with 'stuff', often has a knock on effect in other areas of your life and i found that to be true.

@CathysGhost dancing sounds like a good one! I often listen to music and have a dance while I cook!

@beachcomber70 where would i find free online courses? I would also like to volunteer but I have a 4 month old baby and I am hoping my MIL will have her when I go back to work as it is so don't want to take the mick!

I thought about starting I diary but I start to write and I get too upset at the moment but perhaps that's something to do when I feel more upto it! I would also love to learn the piano but again my son is learning and I don't even know if I can afford to upkeep his lessons let alone ones for myself! It's the boys birthdays soon so I have been trying to think about that and what presents I can buy and a party etc and with money being tighter than usual I guess I will have to get creative so that should keep me busy!! Lovely dog will definitely go for more walks - it's very hard to walk her atm with all four children in tow as I can't let her off lead so defiantly some evening walks are called for especially while it's still light! I used to have a couple of friends I went with a few summers ago but they moved down to the coast perhaps I could see if anyone else is around to meet for an evening dog walk!

@Mintjulia I know one of our neighbours (next door but one) as they have children the same age and we get on, there is a new family with a little boy similar age next door who have just moved in but I haven't seen them and think they might be on holiday! The other side is empty at the moment as the lady sadly passed away!

@Daddylonglegs1965
I like to to read and write perhaps I could find a local book club and use my brain again! I must admit my confidence is quite low and I feel I'm just Mum atm so will be nice to find myself again!!

@theyflewaway I love the idea of parkour! My middle son would love to try it perhaps it's something we could try together! How would I find my local class?

@HairyDogsInUnusualPlaces I will try to de clutter! I must admit I am quite good at clearing although we do have a junk draw! With 4 kids it soon piles up again though! I would like to redo the children's bedrooms so perhaps that's something I could focus on but that might be hard to do in just one short evening!!

Thanks for your ideas everyone!!

May be find a book club or start your own or join a creative writing group.
If you fancy running park run seems very popular and a lot of beginner running groups have a strong social element. Also a few cycling clubs on the go too.