SIL changing DD's clothes

[qazxc]

I'm from a different country so not quite sure if this is weird or normal.
Whenever DSIL has DD she changes her clothes.
I don't really know why. The excuse today was that DD was too hot but the clothes she was wearing are similar to the ones she came back in (Jean's and short sleeve top).
I suspect she thinks that the clothes are not girly enough, she also likes to match the clothes to what her DD is wearing ( they are both 5).
Is this a bit odd? Am I being oversensitive?
I don't really care that much, no skin off my nose apart from the making sure she gets the clothes back.

That is a bit weird, unless dd had spilt something, or it Had got hot, so changed her into shorts, for example.

Matching clothes is weird also.

I would not read much into it. Kids get sweaty and hot in warm weather, this needs changing clothes.

It's really weird. Tbh I wouldn't make too much effort to return the clothes. They would just get "lost" / sent to charity. In the long-run it'll get expensive for her and hopefully put her off doing it put her off doing it.

It's weird, certainly not "normal".

Perhaps the two girls want to wear the same. If you're not that bothered, I'd leave it for the time being. It would be different if your DD objected.

I just thought it strange as it is every single time.
I'd totally get if DD had spilt something on herself or was too cold or too hot.
Also the matching bit must mean she buys 2 sets of outfits.
She's quite particular about the clothes being returned promptly, washed and ironed. So that's the only bit that adds to my workload, as well as making sure her clothes are kept separate from ours.

My in laws did this: I would send dd in clothes, usually ones they had given her, with spares - also usually ones they had given her. They would take and print pics of the day for me, in which she would be wearing clothes I had never seen, and never did see on her, as she had changed out of them when I went to pick her up!

I thought it was weird and struggled a bit, as it was childcare after I had returned to work and I struggled with not making all decisions for dd, as I had been used to. I am sure it was proprietorial on in laws' part.

But I very quickly realised it didn't matter a jot: I had free childcare, dd had a great relationship with her grandparents, and I didn't need to spend any of my free time with them as they had seen dd in the week, which in my view was win-win-win

I recommend that you take a similar stance

That is weird but I guess she likes doing it? My sil often does that but I think for her it’s part of mothering my DD a bit

It’s quite weird. Though as long as you’re getting your stuff back I suppose there’s no harm. There will come a time when your DD won’t cooperate so will stop eventually.

I wouldn’t be in a particular hurry to return them, just chuck in with the rest of the washing

@yomellamoHelly what an immature suggestion.
OP it’s not overly odd, maybe the kids enjoy being dressed similarly? I know I liked wearing the same as the bigger girls when I was little. If it bothers you, make a comment like ‘oh no, did she spill something on her outfit?’ and your SIL will probs tell u why she’s changed your DD.

...it could also be that she doesn't want to feel responsible for your DD getting messy or ruining her outfits in your SIL care, so she changes her into clothes that, if they do get ruined, aren’t yours to have to replace.

I think she's playing at the girls being sisters/twins tbh.

Will look cute in photos etc. Because the girls are just the best of friends more like twins than cousins...

Does she let your niece come to yours without her?

I will admit to changing DN when I looked after them as they would be sent in clothes that I was worried would get dirty,
were often quite impractical for DN to move about in
and on a couple of occasions seemed to be actually causing discomfort e.g heavy, red marks on skin.
I would put a baby grow on them and tactfully tell the Mum there was a nappy leak or sometimes change them back just before pick up.

I think there might be an element of it looking good on the photos / making them look like twins (although despite them being born a few months apart, they look very different, DN is blonde and blue eyed whereas DD is dark haired).
I'm not remotely precious about clothes, IMHO kids are meant to be able to play and get messy.
DN is not allowed to come to our house as we have a cat and SIL has very strong views on cleanliness.

Perhaps it's because your DD clothes may have cat hair on them 🙄 or the wrong washing powder or some such nonsense!

SIL sounds controlling on what little information you've given.

With the washing and ironing, I'd get DD to change back before taking her home, so it would be your SIL's problem.

Justajot that would be good or strip DD when she comes back in and hand the clothes back.
I rarely iron, just hang from dried. And every item seems to have ruffles so it takes a slattern like me ages.
I'm reassured that it's not just me who thinks it's a bit odd.
I wouldn't say anything about it irl though as the kids have a great time together and DSIL loves DD.