Cheap breaks to rekindle romance

[ClownTent]

DP and I are going through a rocky phase. DS is 3 and we have had three long fucking hard years - DP is an AD withdrawal starting 2016, 4 months after DS was born. This triggered depression and anxiety in me the following 2017, 2018 was ok then this year started well but my dad died in February and DP had another breakdown in May and has been back and forth to hospital with huge depression and has just admitted financial difficulty to the point where we are going to have to make massive cut backs and were in serious danger of losing the house.

We have a financial plan now but our relationship has taken a massive beating over the last three years and is/was on the rocks. We want to spend some time this year giving each other the attention we both want and deserve.

I would like part of that to involve mini breaks away together. I've never spent a night apart from DS but it's time now and I would like somewhere DP and I could go together to relax, sight see and, for the love of god, have sex and sleep.

UK, abroad, I don't care. Where would you go? It has to be on the cheaper end, obviously, but I would love to hear other people's ideas. We both like walking, he loves WW2 stuff and I am interested. He does like roman/greek mythology etc and he is also into mountain biking. I am happy to meander or chill out if he is off 'adventuring' though. Neither of us are 'party' people but we don't mind if it is hot or not!

Ideas please!!

There are some lovely pubs with rooms in Rye - great coastal walks, and loads of quirky things to do - antiques shops and nice cafes.

Also had some lovely weekends at The Bell in Ticehurst - another pub with lovely rooms (and good food.)

If it's near enough - stay in Northumberland - visit Housesteads or Vindolanda if he loves Roman history and there are gorgeous walks inland (along Hadrian's Wall) or along silver sandy beaches. Boat rides with seals and puffins, fabulous castles and stately homes every couple of miles.

Castleton in Derbyshire has a few nice hotels and pubs with rooms. Gorgeous walks in the Peak District and Blue John mines.

Further away - Budapest!! Very cheap, staggeringly beautiful. Relax in natural hot spas, explore underground churches and WW2 hospital in the warren of caves under Buda Hill. Gorgeous cafes for ornate cakes and coffee, and a beautiful cafe by the lake in the park where you can sip champagne under the fairy lights for £5 a glass.

We’re in North Wales, so Northumberland is accessible! Love the sound of Budapest too!!

I went on a lovely holiday in Gloucestershire in a Yurt. It had a private sauna in it and a hot tub just outside by a lake.

Krakow is beautiful and cheap. Auschwitz and the salt mines are great day trips from there.

A hot tub sounds amazing right now and is never have considered Gloucestershire - I’ll have a look, thank you!

Krakow was on my ideas list, I’ve always wanted to go and I reckon DP would be overwhelmed with it, so I’ll keep an eye out for there too.

We went to Paris last year and included the Army museum, it was really interesting. Napoleon’s tomb was the best part, really beautiful. Paris passes really kept the cost down as well because we had all our ‘activity money’ already sorted in advance so the rest was just food, accommodation and travel.

has just admitted financial difficulty to the point where we are going to have to make massive cut backs and were in serious danger of losing the house

So you now want to spend money on unnecessary trips away knowing you can't afford it and you're risking losing the roof over your head?

Yes you want to salvage your relationship but fgs when money problems come in the door love flies out of the window.

If you need to get away then go out for a picnic and walk for an afternoon. You have to cut your coat according to your cloth.

You’re in danger of loosing your house. A minibreak is not what you need to be doing right now, ‘cheap’ or not.

If you have someone that will look after your child (are they going to grand parents?) you could have a staycation weekend at home. Cook a nice meal, go for a nice walk locally and have sex and sleep. You don’t need to be away to do any of that.

I understand why others are going WTAF - you could lose your house, so why a minibreak. But if you keep it really low cost I think getting away is a very good idea. Staying home you are surrounded by all the stress of everyday life. Being somewhere new you get a break from it and perspective. You may choose to sell and downsize or move to a cheaper area etc. But to make these decisions in a neutral space is really valuable.

I do also understand why people are questioning the mini breaks, but I did also say that we had a financial plan in place. DP runs his own business that has the potential to be incredibly lucrative and was in the years previous to his/our troubles. Our plan involves boosting his business again to the point where we are comfortable again.

I also didn't give a time frame for our minibreaks - there's no way we could go in the next two months, but there's no reason why we couldn't save for one just before Christmas or in January!

To the PP that said we had to cut our cloth - I absolutely do. I feed the three of us for a week on between £17 and £25, I haven't had a hair cut since November and new clothes since before that. DS is clothed from eBay and I can't remember the last time I didn't take a picnic on a day out instead of lunch.

That being said, I have also stayed in £39 hotel rooms and had a whale of a time - I'm not looking to splurge a grand on a trip away for the hell of it!

Any closer to deciding where you'd like to go? 😊

I didn't see this, whitecandle sorry!

Not yet! But DS stayed with his GPs last night and I had my first lie in in 3 years 3 months this morning and it was lovely, so I hopped back on this thread to pick up inspiration for a night/two nights away now!

For anyone that is waiting to stick the boot in - budget will be less than £100 and probably not till October.

So you have free childcare? That would otherwise be the biggest cost.

If you also have free childcare for evenings and weekends you could do nice, low cost things more often, eg walk, meal out, drink or cinema.

Given your budget and the exchange rates overseas is probably unaffordable.