Funny mishearings

[IWouldPreferNotTo]

English is not my partners first language. So while holding our baby I heard

"where's the cock blocker" to which I said "I'm holding him".

What they were saying was "where's the Cork blocker (wine stopper)"

Any other funny mishearings?

An Italian friend of mine kept saying "Can't be asked" until someone told her it was actually "Can't be arsed".

I was out with a colleague one lunch time and there was a sports car that is ridiculously expensive (the man is known locally and has several different cars of a similar level) driving round the one way system. I asked my colleague what he did for a living and he told me he was a ‘curry seed trader’. I didn’t realise such a job existed let alone one that obviously someone does so well from. I told him I didn’t realise there was such a highly paid job for someone who sells curry seeds. At which point he repeated what he said slowly “currency trader’... 🤦‍♀️. It made slightly more sense!

I was talking to a colleague and she said the totally innocuous phrase “I’ve got a catalogue at home.” Our boss was in the room and looked totally shocked. He thought that she had said that she had a cattle prod at home!

Its "asked" but has changed "recently" to arsed. Just saying..........

Thanks Gerty, I'm not English either so also learning the lingo!

I was in town with a friend and said could we go to the bank, I had to pay a cheque in.
"You can't," she said, very bewildered.
"Why not?"
"They don't sell meat."
After a few more questions I realised she thought I'd said "Buy a chicken."

Getty, pretty sure it's always been arsed. At least for my lifetime.

Getty
..🤣🤣🤣🤣Was never can't be asked!!!

I make a complete idiot of myself recently.

I was reading while my Mother watched TV. There was a trailer for a new serial killer series. I was only half listening and heard "We examine the Scottish serial killer Phil Omenom and showed a photo of a man just as it said that. I said "Phil Omenon?" I've never heard of that killer. Have you?

They'd actually said "We examine the Scottish serial killer phenomenon."

Macy Gray's 'I Try' has a line saying 'My world crumbles when you are not near' in the chorus. My friend was convinced that it was 'I wear goggles when you are not here' (don't try and hear it, you can never unhear it!!)

I remember my mate’s mum saying how dreadful that Peter Files is ....

Peadophile !

I got the giggles when an Indian colleague of mine was saying he hoped he had "Hitchcocks" in his garden. It was entirely my fault — when I'd been telling him about them (he'd never heard of them) I'd obviously said it too fast, and he hadn't seen it written down. I just couldn't help thinking that hedgehogs didn't really have the right air of suspense/menace.