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Original poster

Am I the only Mum to not take a 6 month old to baby groups?

70 replies

Stillmonday · 22/07/2019 19:21

He's only 6 months and we do a lot of play at home, I just don't fancy the idea of a baby / play group but everyone I speak to keeps asking me if I've joined any yet.

Am I the only person to not go??

OP posts:
YouJustDoYou · 22/07/2019 19:42

Six month old here, no groups. Partly because I also have a four year old who would have to come too

Same here when 2nd and 3rd was born. Couldn't stand the inane conversations that were constantly about nappies and feeding and milk and sleeping and everything else baby related. Was barely surviving as it was with my oldest who was just a horror, just couldn't stand having to listen to how perfect everyone elses babies were (severe sleep depravtion for the first 2 years and PND didn't help either).

Rachelover40 · 22/07/2019 19:44

I didn't though have to say there weren't any then in my area. I'm sure I'd have hated them! Just thinking about it makes me shudder.

Lizzielocket Good god no, both DC had to make do socialising with friends children until they were 3 and able to be left at playgroup. Then it was a drop and run so I didn’t have to engage. I couldn’t imagine anything worse than sitting with a load of other people talking about baby poop and how it’s obvious their little darling is going to be a high achiever.

A woman after my own heart!

belleshelles · 22/07/2019 19:44

DD is almost two, I went once and absolutely despised it. Incredibly cliquey, I was the youngest one there so was ignored the entire time. Would probably rather stick pins in my eyes than go back.

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Bourbonbiccy · 22/07/2019 19:44

You are definitely not the only one not going and if you don't fancy it, like are you doing now, just don't bother

I went with my son and he loved them, and I like to be out and about, staying in the house would drive me potty. Sometimes at the groups it can still be one on one time with us as he wants me to play with him, but mostly he is off lol but not all babies enjoy it and if it's working good for you now, there's really no need to change it up yet.

AnguaUberwaldIronfoundersson · 22/07/2019 19:45

To be fair, the groups I go to aren't all about the little darlings high achievements and the colour of their nappies. It's in a working class area on the outskirts of a city and I don't think anyone has heard of Grimms Rainbow or Boden. Half of them are their for the same reason as I am, because they'd be bored to death at home otherwise.

Spainintherain · 22/07/2019 19:46

I don't even know how people to get to them. Near me they are always at his morning feed time then he has his long nap.

Courtney555 · 22/07/2019 19:52

Nope. I can't do "twatty" mummies, and there's always at least one (usually with a sidekick.)

I went swimming, walked a lot round national trust properties, libraries, occasional soft play. Where I could escape said women if they descended, and not be trapped in a room with their loud performance parenting. Yuck.

DS also went to nursery 3 mornings p/w to ensure socialisation with other children.

happytoday73 · 22/07/2019 19:54

I went to a few... Didn't like them. Didn't feel welcome. Didn't need them. Didn't bother with them 2nd time.

As long as you are happy it's fine. Baby doesn't need yet..

Teachermaths · 22/07/2019 19:55

WOrked my arse off entertaining and looking after a high needs baby who didn't play with toys and who only napped for 30 mins at a time which I had to use to pump. Tried to maintain a house. Tried to stay alive.

I did most of this, bar the pumping and still needed the sanctuary of other mums at the village hall to silently weep with! I honestly would have had PND if I'd stayed home all the time. The afternoons were long enough.

Teachermaths · 22/07/2019 19:57

As for "twatty mummies"... What groups are you going to?! A cuppa and a malted milk at the village hall alongside a few faded toys was my style of group.

mumderland · 22/07/2019 20:04

With DS I didn't take him to any until he was 18 months. Then it was 1 playgroup a week. With DD she goes to 3 groups/classes because she is completely different to DS and she loves it. She is 15 months and has been going since she was around 9 months.
If you're happy not going then don't. My HV tried to push it on me a lot with DS 🙄

CoodleMoodle · 22/07/2019 20:08

I took DD to her first group when she was almost 2. I hated it, it was cliquey and awful. But she had never really interacted with other kids before (lived in a tiny village, no friends/family with similarly aged children) and seemed to enjoy it, so we kept going. Bloody expensive it was too, but there were no other options.

Then we moved to a house ina more suburban area, and found a different toddler group, which we went to until she started school (last Sept). She absolutely loved it there and over time I quite enjoyed it as well. They did free play, a craft, a story and snack, songs and then a bit more free play, all in two hours and running on donations. The ladies who run it are mostly lovely. It's finished for the summer but I'm almost looking forward to taking DS in Sept, he'll be 14months.

They're not necessary, but if you find a nice one then they can be great. IMO there's no benefit for the baby before they can play, but if you want to socialise with other parents they can be good for you, get you out of the house, etc.

bebeboeuf · 22/07/2019 20:12

I hated them
DS Hayes then so we didn’t bother after we’d given it a try once or twice

PleaseGoogleIt · 22/07/2019 20:13

Groups were my salvation too. I also wouldn't have met anyone with children of DD's age because I've had DD much later than everyone else.

I went to 3 a week and I always loved those days because it meant I wasn't bored and looking for ways to entertain DD constantly.

Pipandmum · 22/07/2019 20:15

Not at that age. I met up with a few of the mums from post natal group for coffee once a week but I didn’t fancy sitting someplace with a baby on my lap with strangers I had little in common with other than giving birth. Once kids were mobile we went to a indoor play area but never met anyone there it was just to occupy the kids.

tiredddd · 22/07/2019 20:18

I've been going to them since my LG was 3 months old, but focused ones like a sensory class and a music one. She still goes to them now, I work part time and that is our thing to do on my days off..she loves them, and I think for me I needed to get out and about. Also made two good friends from them, who have kids the same age.

Kpo58 · 22/07/2019 20:18

I took mine to groups or I wouldn't have seen or talked to anyone else for the entire day.

Bubbletrouble43 · 22/07/2019 20:28

Hell no! I didn't take dd1 to any at that age because I just didn't want to, and dds 2 and 3 didn't go either because they are twins and I was never ready to leave the house before noon! Don't worry. I did stuff with all mine when they got to toddlery age but I felt it was a waste of time and energy and money till they could socialise etc

Lemoneeza · 22/07/2019 20:38

I go to a different one every day with my two year old. not sure what I would do all day otherwise. nobody really speaks to me though, bar the odd hello. I think I missed the boat when friendships were being made in the baby stages; I was happy watching homes under the hammer in my pyjamas.

Rainbowknickers · 22/07/2019 20:43

With number 1 I took her to them all
You name it-we did it
Numbers 2,3,4,5 and 6 kids I didn’t take them anywhere
All 6 have turned into decent kids/adults
It’s a waste of time and money at that age

thatlldodotpig · 22/07/2019 20:43

There’s a bit of a ‘cool mums don’t go to groups’ vibe on this thread!

As another pp said, groups were my salvation. I didn’t mind the odd performance parenter if it meant I got to feel a little less lonely for a couple of hours a week.

But I did resent the amount of headspace inane nursery rhymes took up in my head Grin

SarahAndQuack · 22/07/2019 20:50

When DD was 6 months I was working full time and her mother was working 3.5 days a week, and we didn't have childcare - there was no way I was wasting my time on baby groups! Grin

I think DP took her a few times but TBH, at that age, I'm not sure they're really very interested in other babies. Might as well do some music or whatever at home.

PotolBabu · 22/07/2019 20:51

I have done both. DS1 didn’t like groups but preferred classes so we did baby sensory, a music class, tumble tots and a swimming class. It got us out and about in the morning, home for lunch and nap and then we did a long walk/ hang out in the park etc.
DS2 was much more social so I ditched the more expensive classes and did playgroups instead. We did baby swimming and one music group but we did go to a playgroup in the mornings. I didn’t care too much if I made friends or found like minded sorts- I just wanted to get out of the house and do something else.

MrsXx4 · 22/07/2019 20:52

I have a 6 month old and he has been going to groups since he was just over 2 months old! I needed to get out of the house and wanted to meet people to do things with. I’m afraid to say I actually really enjoy the classes and he does too! I’ve watched him change week by week in seeing him interact more and start to get excited by things! Not to say that I wouldn’t have seen that playing with him at home but the classes I go to follow the same patterns and I have just noticed it more. We only go to baby sensory and a swimming class but it’s good as our routine means I only have 2 days of the week at home which I use for having a housework day and then for meal prepping and making his food for the next week.

I’ve made some great friends who I see all the time so it was def the best thing for me! We have a break from classes over the summer but I have loads of plans for days out with the friends I have made! ......and sometimes just us mums meet up and drink cocktails and never even mention the babies! It’s nice!

trilbydoll · 22/07/2019 21:03

It was good to give the day a bit of structure. With dd2 it was a useful way to entertain dd1 while a nice elderly lady held the baby!

People ask in case you're horribly isolated and depressed at home, if you're happy doing your own thing then it's not a problem.

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