Do I make the first move?

[Lollipop82]

Hello, this might seem a bit long winded, but I’m struggling with what to do about my MIL. Her son and I share a son. As he works away he isn’t home for weeks at a time and when he is home for a short few days we spend them as our family of 3. When I was pregnant and for the first 6 months of our son being here my MIL made loads of effort and got in touch every week. Now he’s nearly 2 I haven’t heard anything from her, and she’s only seen him twice so far this year. Ive got a bad feeling that she’s off with me and think it’s my fault that she doesn’t see much of her son and grandson, but I’m not sure it should be my job to get in touch with her and arrange meeting for her to see him. Any advice would be great!

Why isn't it your job?

I often get in touch with my DIL and she with me. It pays to build your own relationship with your MIL - totally apart from one which includes her son. Just between you and her. Sort of like a friend if possible.
You could call her and say you miss seeing her and would be happy if she were to come round for tea on Sunday. Tell he her beautiful grandson needs a granny. Hope it works out for you.

Thank you for your advice, I should’ve probably mentioned that A few months ago we had his christening and she completely blanked me and didn’t bother at all with our son at all. Perhaps it’s still worth extending an olive branch

Hi Lollipop

I would give it one more try - for all your sakes.

I know it might be hard but I think you could do it. Good luck!