Can my husband stop me taking our kids on holiday??

[Loulou0]

My kids' surname are the same as their dad's. I kept my own surname.

Me and the kids are going abroad soon and I thought I would need a permission letter from him to fly?

We are separating and he is being an arsehole. He won't sign a letter.

What shall I do?

Thank you

Take their birth certificates with you. I've taken my son (different surname) on holiday. I was asked what our relationship was, was but never had to prove it.

My dc have my name and I've never had any problems

When dc travel with their dad I write him a letter but he's never needed it.

To be on safe side travel with the full birth certificates (showing your name). As long as you have return tickets and can show holiday plans I'd think you will be ok.

If he's being an arse about holidays, in future don't tell him of your travel plans. Let him know about them as you board plane or after you arrive.

You have parental responsibility and the right to travel with your children. He can't stop this.

Make sure he can't mess with passports

I often travel with DS who has his dad's name and my older children who have my name. they always ask him who he is travelling with and once he says mum they wave us through.

I take his birth certificate just in case though.

Unless you have a residence order in your favour, you do technically need the permission of everyone with parental responsibility, yes. Chances are you'll be fine, but legally you do need his permission and he yours.

Do you have time to go to court? If so, get a specific issue order. If not, then take birth certs and hope for the best.

You have parental responsibility and the right to travel with your children. He can't stop this.

This is wrong. Legally it is child abduction if a parent takes the child out of the country without the consent of the other parent with parental responsibility www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1984/37/section/1

Of course in reality it's extraordinarily unlikely that anyone would actually be prosecuted in this kind of situation but there's always a risk that you will be questioned at either airport.

I've been stopped 3 times with DS who has his dads name. They ask DS who I am and I show them his full birth certificate and we go merrily on our way.

Strangely we've only ever been stopped when returning to the uk!

and I agree with everything Onethread said.

I believe that legally you do need the permission of the other patent with PR to take a child abroad, but I think if you take a birth certificate then there you are unlikely to have a problem. Are your dc old enough to tell an official that you are their mum? I've had someone ask the dc who I was, they said I was their mum, and there were no more checks.

@TheClitterati and do you feel the same about the father doing this, telling OP he’s taking the children abroad as he boards the plane....?

FFS sometimes I despair at the advice given on here.

LEGALLY yes you should have his permission to leave the country. Apply for a Specific Issues Order at court for permission to travel, or a Residency Order (which would enable you to travel freely in the future too). Really simple to do yourself, a couple of hundred pounds - money well spent.

That said, I got a Residency Order when my ex did exactly the same as yours is. Only ever been questioned once, after 8 trips abroad, and that was at the Swiss/French border.

I've never taken a letter and have never been asked for one. I know you're supposed to but that's my experience. I have done multiple trips to the UAE, US, various countries Europe and SE Asia. I share a surname with my children.

Honestly, get legal advice. Not a bunch of strangers telling you all different things online.

It's not worth the hassle of getting it wrong.

Why do people post such crap advice on the Internet?

Legally, unless you have a court order stating the children live with you, you need the consent of both parents to travel abroad. If he won't agree to give consent, you should speak to a solicitor about getting a court order. If you go abroad knowing he hasn't consented, you're just giving him ammunition against you when he goes to court himself about child arrangements - which he may well do.

I had this worry last month (although my dd's dad did write a letter for me). I still took her birth certificate just in case. I had no problems at any of the airports. No one asked me what my relationship was with her or for any written proof. I was also with my partner of which none of us share the same surname.

When I was taking my children abroad and their dad tried to stop us we were told by both solicitors that the RP can take the children away for up to 4 weeks and can't be stopped/does not need permission. This was nearly ten years ago now so may have changed but that what we were told. He had to suck it up and let us have the well deserved break. And we didn't get stopped at the airport despite me having a different surname.

Nobody checks you when you leave the country. You will need children full birth certificates when you come back to the UK.
My children have different surnames than me and we get asked every time when we come back to the UK. Children get asked who am I, as they are now 6 and 9, but that's it. You don't even need to carry paper certificates, as photos of it on the phone is enough these days.