Really bad school report

[Pippapotomus]

DS aged 5 bought his school report home today. It's bad. I wasn't expecting it to be brilliant but this is something else. Socially he is OK, is well behaved and has friends. Target wise he is behind for his age in every single thing.

Fuck.

And actually if after such an unsettled year he is still doing well socially and behaviour wise I would see that as the most important thing

Absolutely agree with PPs , he's doing well to make friends and settle in with everything else that was going on. Honestly I used to worry about any lagging behind my first DD early on in school,
reading groups etc, and in the end she caught up fine a few years later. Don't worry at 5 !

Is he in Reception or Yr1? Either way I wouldn't worry at this stage. Children vary hugely when they are this young. Keep an eye on his progress. Speak regularly to his class teacher or TA and check what additional support is in place. (They should appreciate you wanting to work with them). Boys fune motor skills for writing and manipulation of small objects/scissors can be a bit slower and also expressive language. This means that the gap can seem wider at 5. It should start to close though. This is why I'd want to speak regularly with his next teacher. If there are any persisting difficulties that's when I would get intervene.

My dd scored low on everything from reception to year 2. Her reading was appalling. Just had year 3 report and she is in the average band above halfway. I know some friends children are always in the exceptional top band. I don’t compare.

I’m happy to see progress every year and I’m more pleased that she has been described as a kind, helpful girl who is a pleasure to teach. She has good friends and she enjoys school. There will be enough pressure later on in her school life. The testing now is no indication of her intelligence or her future capabilities. Many diligent average students outperform bright kids who don’t put the effort in. Don’t stress just yet.

My son is 5 and LOVES Numberblocks, I think it's from CBeebies but there's plenty on Youtube. Fun and irritating in equal measure :)

Just as a comparison though, he goes to Kindergarten in Germany and won't start school until 6 and a half. Only in his last year of KG will they begin anything approaching formal numeracy and literacy, and then only numbers up to 10. Once they start school at 6 they generally are good and ready and learning is relatively intensive from then on, but I'm just mentioning it in the context that there is still PLENTY of time for your DS to get to grips with the basics. Try not to worry :)

Your boy is a star, actually a superstar. He has had a year that would knock many adults and he's come out of it a lovely boy.

Take him for a nice day out as a treat and tell him how proud you are and how complete strangers think he is amazing.

Perhaps you need to go into school and have a chat about your concerns. You're maybe reading too much into this - he's 5, very young- and I doubt you were meant to see it as 'bad'.

It's best to keep lines of communication open with the class teacher if you can,and they should certainly be flagging up any concerns with you, not putting them in a report at 5 years old!

Don't worry too much - you've both had much more important things to cope with.

echo what others say.
he's 5
he's one of the younger ones of his year
he has medical issues that are now resolved (glasses) and becoming routine (diabetes)

let him have a great summer, read a lot (much much easier if he can actually see!), count everything you can see.

next school year start out with school support and he should catch up in no time!

He essentially missed out on all the academics before getting his diagnosis and glasses sorted.

In that time he mastered the social aspect of school. No doubt with his blood sugars on an even keel and his vision improved he'll be able to start learning.

That is not a bad report. Though I understand that you are disappointed.

It has some very positive comments about extremely important social skills and developments which many children, (but not your boy!) often struggle with. It is also stating, presumably accurately, that your child, who is six months younger than the oldest children in his year, and has had a difficult year health wise ,is not achieving the range of targets that are set nationally for all reception children.

I always think the reception year is particularly hard for any child born later than February /March. When you are only five a six month difference in age is HUGE. It is a tenth of your total life experience. As children get older that difference evens out substantially.

Don't spend the whole summer fretting about it, concentrate on having a happy and healthy summer with your little boy, by all means do a bit of reading, keep practising the phonics, do fun maths . But I would concentrate on developing physical skills, catching , hitting and throwing a ball, riding a bike, scooting, skipping, swimming, climbing in the park, good fun and helping to develop those larger muscle skills which he needs before he develops fine muscle skills. Not "school work" as such, but things that will stand him in good stead in year 1.

The glasses make a huge difference. My DC1 got them at 4 and before then wasn't drawing, writing his name, anything like that. Being able to see properly was so vital.

If this is the EYFS targets - the important ones are communication, social development and physical development. Those are the ones I would pay attention to now, don't fret about maths & literacy.

So he's managed to settle in socially despite feeling probably pretty awful and not being able to see well - that isn't a bad report, that's pretty damn good.

Now that his health issues are known and he has glasses, he'll catch up. The school will support him, and you sound like a caring mum. Don't focus on the academics too much - read to him every day, do things like baking to get him used to numbers, let him help with the food shopping, do crafts to get his motor skills up to speed. He's still very young - at this age there will be a huge ability range at school. It does even out and with a mum like you supporting him, he will get there.

I echo everyone else. I’d rather my children were well behaved and kind but not meeting targets than meeting the targets but naughty and no friends. My child was also diagnosed with type 1 this year. It’s horrendous. I’m sure he’s doing so well with everything he’s putting up with.

Having a lack of concentration due to Diabetes will be a huge factor in any child's performance! Not being able to see will be another huge factor! Given all of this, it's not really surprising that he's behind! I'm sure that as you/school are able to find ways to control his Diabetes, he will start to make progress and being able to see properly will also be huge. It also sounds like the school are offering him some support which is good.

Even though it's nearly the end of term, it might be worth contacting the class teacher and SENCO to talk about how best to manage his needs going forwards and to ensure he can make good progress. Or if you don't want to do this now, it might be a good idea for September.

As a teacher he may well be behind right now as he’s had health problems. Any teacher worth their salt would have put something like ‘despite the many obstacles that X has faced this year he has worked really hard to get to this point and will continue to improve next year’ I will always acknowledge difficulties that the children have faced and worked around anyway. But don’t worry about progress. My cousin was low due to repeated ear infections. He had grommets fitted last year and now he’s come as working above for most subjects this yr.

Just wanted to chip in as a teacher, albeit of KS4/5.

The social and behaviour bit is the most important thing, plus the fact that you give a shit. Honestly. The kids who are unreachable are the ones who won’t or can’t behave. Yours isn’t one of those.

Literacy is the next most important thing.
Just do as much reading with him as you and he can bear, and try not to worry. He’s still so little.

To be honest I wouldn’t worry about targets in infants.
DS2 has heating problems due to glue ear and also being a typical boy he just wanted to build Lego and make dens in the woods. In infants he was behind targets for reading and writing.
He’s just finished year 3 and is above target for reading and on target for writing. I don’t t targets should be taken too seriously until about age 7, kids developed at a different rate - after all look at the difference in when children first walk and talk. At age 5 you would be hard pushed to know who spoke and walked at an earlier age!!

So he's been seriously ill and has had to adapt to a chronic health condtion and couldn't see the letters and digits properly on a page for the first half of the year. He's had a lot on!

It's still early days. Children do a lot of maturing in yR, 1 & 2.

I read with DS's class and in yR a lot of my readers were struggling to sound out their beginners books, then at some point in y1 they've really clicked and taken off... when they were ready.

My other DS struggled to pick up reading in yR and y1. We suspected dyslexia and got put on hold until he was 8. Meanwhile in y2 his teacher did a reading stress test and with the right colour tint, he could suddenly process the letters and immediately jumped up to an age appropriate level. Writing is being slower to follow as it turns out he also has dyspraxia, but until he could read, the other curriculum areas didn't stand a chance. As long as I know he's doing what he can and learning along the way, I can't ask any more of him.

Socially he's doing well which is an enormous asset and more useful than meeting curriculum targets at this stage. The rest should follow with time and support, especially if the diabetes and vision caused a bit of a delay at the start of the year.

Lots of sharing books, you reading to him, and finding accessible books that he likes is so important. DS1 was often too tired to read when he started school, and if he was, I read to him. He now reads for pleasure which makes me so proud as I know it's a bit tougher for him. Alphablocks and Numberblocks really are worth playing on iPlayer.

Be proud of him

Bless him. What a difficult year for him. I agree, if he's doing well socially that is a massive plus. So many children struggle with this. Hopefully he has a more settled year and makes rapid progress. I would ask for meeting with his new teacher in September and day how worried you are that he is behind and please can they give him any extra support possible and that you are very keen to support at home if they can advise on areas in a few weeks when they know him better. Good luck. Do not panic or over worry yourself

Ah bless you. I had the same with my eldest and he was fine by the time he went to year 3. Try not to worry - he’s fine socially and that is the main thing at this age!

Your DS is still so young, many kids don't get the hang of school until 7-8. My DS1 was put in the extra support group for year 1 as he was so behind. He got 2A*/5A/2B at GCSE.
His sister has only just got up to average levels at end of year 3...so on that basis I can expect a clean sheet of A* for her at GCSE....

He's had a difficult year. Once his medication/diet/routine is more stable he will be able to focus more on his school work.

My DD who is 6 now, but was 5 then - was very behind on her reading and spelling last year. I did do some stuff at home with her as was really worried and got her reading more.

She now is reading year 2 books easily just finishing year 1. At this age, they can catch up so well, as well as having different techniques that help them learn.

See what resources you could use at home but ultimately, encourage him to learn and make it fun.

If he is behind in Age Related Expectations it’s great that the school is picking up on this and offering extra support.

It may be nothing is needed or it may be he will benefit.

If he will benefit, on however small a scale, support earlier rather than later can make a big difference over the school lifetime.

That's not a bad report! Step away from the targets and measuring madness!

Have a lovely summer, keep up with reading to him, and plenty of board and card games, and stop worrying.

All things considered I'd be changing schools! They should have let you know how he was doing and definitely should have noticed he was struggling with his eyesight. Sounds like the poor kid has had a rough year.