DH ill need to plan for the future

[Futureplanning]

DH has recently been diagnosed with a serious heart problem, prognosis isn't great, although at the moment he is managing quite well.

I'm not sure how long he is going to be able to sustain working or at least full time. We have young dc and basically live month to month.

I feel I need to plan for what may be a difficult future, to at least alleviate financial worries.

I don't even know where to start, we just don't have the spare income to do any serious saving and minus one income, our outgoings would far outweigh or incomings.

I just don't know how people manage and I need to learn fast.

Any advice would be gratefully received, I'm getting myself in a tiz.

Can he start claiming for PIP whilst he's working ?

My DH is terminal, so we are arranging wills etc.

Sorry about your husband.

I will look in to PIP thank you.

Talk to CAB about what benefits are appropriate. Sickness benefits are not means-tested and it's best to get the claim in asap.

I think the British Heart Foundation have an online forum too for specific heart issues.

My DH is incurable, I won’t say terminal until there is no more treatment to try. Does your DH have life insurance or pension through work? If so make sure you’re named on them. Do you work? If not, think about getting back to work now so you have a job for after. Take advice on pension contributions and what would happen to them, you should get them and they can be invested. Does he have other work benefits? What’s sick pay? DH never goes below 70% of his salary as long as he lives (currently still works) and then I will receive a lump sum when / if he dies which will clear my mortgage and leave a good amount to invest and i will aim to live on my salary and use the investment for holidays / uni etc

We are lucky in that I work and have a decent job and can cover our day to day costs.

Look at your outgoings and reduce where possible, get on to cheap tariffs etc all helps

Is there any opportunity for you to retrain/move into a better paid position/take on extra hours?

Look at your mortgage and see if it will get paid off in the event of critical illness .. I would go and speak to citizens advice though . Def apply for pip

My OH has just been undergoing investigations and has stage 4 cancer and we are in a panic too. We are not married so having to get him to name me as his nominated person for his pension. Sorting out wills. Looking to get married quickly as we have DC and he has another property and we need to get all finances in order for the DC. It has been pretty crass but we have had to focus on what needs to be done ASAP and then hope the treatment works.

Sorry there are so many of us in this situation. It’s all rather rubbish

Thanks and sorry for those in a similar position.

I do work 30 hours per week, so there is an option to increase them. DH is in a new job, so unfortunately not entitled to very much but will look at his pensions, think that may take a while to sort as he has had a few with various jobs over the years. Will also sort wills out.

Good idea to speak to CAB, I'll make an appointment.

Feels so wrong doing all this and like you say a bit crass, but best to sort whilst we have the time to do so.

It is scary isn't it. In March my dh has been diagnosed with a brain tumour. He was in hospital for a week while they did extensive test as close to pituitary gland which affects hormones. In June bloods came back he has Polycythemia Vera and recent bloods shows he also has Addison's disease. I just keep thinking just 4 months ago none of this was happening. As Addison's disease has male life expectancy of 64 years and 8 months so we are now looking at information on early retirement on health grounds. He is having operation to remove tumour in September. My dh works for civil service so will at least get full paid sick leave when on recuperation after operation. Does your dh work in private or public sector? That makes a huge difference as private organisations do not always give sick periods with full pay. If you think dh heart issues will be permanent what do consultant say about work? Could he retire early? I have found whilst researching if they continue to work part time they are classed as able to work and will get lower actuary reduced private pension but if deemed too unwell to work at all can get a more generous actuary reduced private pension. His employer can also recommend he is unable to continue to work and so this helps private pension provision. In terms of state pension he could claim disability pay for period he can't work. An employer can choose to pay full pay or not. If a person is deemed to be unfit to never work they can claim PIP but this is not a lot tbh. Have you got critical home insurance if he is unfit to work? We don't have this but i wish we had taken it now. I know how hard this is but try not to panic and keep pushing for him to get treatment asap.

Firstly don't panic, it's a shock and very upsetting so don't make sudden decisions.

Look at what benefits you can claim, pip isn't means tested but the threshold is quite high for help.

Look at your career options, I don't know how old you are but could you retrain to be the "breadwinner"?

Look at benefits/early retirement etc available if he has to stop work, is downsizing an option?

CAB can help as can advisors from specific illness charities.

Best wishes

It is the shock and the speed at which it is all happening that makes it so scary. Can you talk to consultant about retiring early on ill health grounds? In terms of managing money you can either increase incomings or reduce outgoings or better still both. To reducie outgoings check if you can reduce Virgin/Sky/Metflix packages. We told Sky we wanted to reduce package and were offered a price reduction. Try shopping one day later each week and making shopping last one day longer. Try to get into this habit now so not such a big shock later. I hope you have friends and family support. Sign up to TopCashBack and through their site go on to check you are on cheapest electricity and gas rates. If you end up on PIP check if you can claim any benefits like housing council tax reduction. Don't be too proud to accept help both practical with child care and financial if any relatives offer any.

Can he claim attendance allowance? Or do it until he gets PIP?
My DH passed away but had a DS1500 so was able to claim everything.
Can you save money by getting a ‘concessionary’ bus pass / blue badge (automatic if he gets 8 points or more in the moving around component)
Contact your social services to see what support they offer for carers too.

@caringcarer

Addison's disease only has a male life expectancy so low because a lot of young males with the disease don't take their tablets properly or as regularly as they should. Not for any other reason.

I have Addison's if you have any other questions

Thanks again for the replies and advice, I've made notes to remind me of it all.

His job is in the private sector and he's only been with the company a matter of weeks, so not expecting much there. Realistically I think he will just get benefits of some kind, need to spend more time researching what, but I'm not expecting it to be much, so a huge shortfall in income.

To be honest we already live quite frugally, money is often tight anyway, but will find ways to cut costs further.

When the time comes I can easily increase my hours, mindful not to do it too soon due to the impact that will have on dc and childcare costs too.

Luckily mortgage is very low, so downsizing would cost more. We have 4 years left on a loan which I might start overpaying on to get it cleared quicker. I'll look in to that.

I think I need to make some robust plans and be prepared, so when the times comes I don't have money as a stress and can just concentrate on him.

Oh how I wish he had some insurance, sounds awful but I think we naively thought nothing like this would ever happen to us.

So sorry to hear this.

Yes, claim PIP, he can get this even if he keeps working for a while.

If he stops working he can also claim. contribution based ESA, which won't be affected by income or capital. If he gets placed in the support group for this, he can get this indefinitely.

Also if he has any pensions from previous jobs can he access them early on ill-health grounds?

Also as PP said, PIP can be a passport for a blue badge, free bus pass etc.

If he gets turned down for anything, appeal.

Also @Futureplanning, don't forget to take care of yourself as well as your husband.

sort out paperwork - wills LPAs etc whilst you have the time

Sounds dreadful but thing about what he wants for a funeral as you will need money set aside for that.

Get all paperwork in one place and in order, sort out passwords and access to all accounts, make sure you are named on everything. Please do make sure there is a will otherwise probate will be a nightmare

In terms of reducing costs, can you look at other childcare arrangements that are less expensive? Not sure what you are currently paying for, Can you change working hours to do say 3 long days or whatever suits.

In terms of cost savings - plan plan plan, so school uniform look for lightly worn second hand, utilise sales that are on for shoes etc, take a good hard look at shopping and start reducing things now, but also meal plan. I would also set yourself up an emergency fund that you pay into each month.

I would be looking to take my lifestyle back and think about what you want to spend time doing with your husband over the next few years and making memories with the kids as well. Are there some charities you can approach to help out with experiences to help the kids have quality time with Dad?

Good Luck

If you don't already shop at Aldi or Lidl I would switch to those. Good your mortgage is low. If you are caring for dh you won't be able to get carers allowance as you will earn too much but if you had to stay home to care for him then make sure you claim it then. If you work 30 hours and dh has to stop working make sure you claim working parents tax credits. I would check on the benefits checker just to see if you could be claiming any benefits now. I hope your dh keeps well.

So sorry to hear your stories.
Just wishing all your husbands and partners the gift of time.
🙏

Look very carefully at sickness benefits because, unlike old-age pensions, the NI contributions for contribution-based ESA are only counted within a very narrow slot.

You don't want a situation where he reduces his work hours drastically for a while, then finds that this has ruled out contribution-based ESA when the time comes to stop completely.

Other forms of ESA are means-tested (or now rolled into Universal Credit, I lose track), so have a complicated burden of paperwork.

Sorry you're going through this.

Thank you and for your well wishes.

Benefits are so complicated, hopefully CAB will point us in the right direction with it all.

So difficult to have the needed conversations with DH, he is burying his head in the sand and doesn't want to discuss anything. However this is all still very new and a shock, so hopefully this will soon change. In the meantime I will work on reducing outgoings and start squirrelling money away.

It's really hard, my DH is in almost denial about his prognosis 😢

So sorry you are going through this.

Have a look a dave Ramsey for financial advise as well, he has different steps
Step 1 - - emerrgency fund recommends £1000 but up to each individual so that if anything crops up to dont but it on credit
Step 2 -- pay off consumer debt
Step 3 -- monthly out goings saved - recomend 6 months

There are other steps that follow on from this but would recommend steps 1-3 to focus on on now as then it will give you breathing space.

Sit down and work out a budget, do it in one go, then it is all over and done with. My DH died 6yrs ago (also related to heart but far more unexpected).

It differently put my mind at rest re financial worries when we figured out what we could do. He was on minimum wage part time so I was already the breadwinner and an accountant so I least had some idea.

Not just budgets but sort out other general paperwork that may need to be sorted (other stuff related to insurance etc).

Have a thorough look at his work contract re sickness pay.

and ensure wills is done correctly. DH never got round to a will and that caused a bit of a nightmare re life insurance etc.

As awful as this sounds you need to think about funeral costs too, I went halves with my MIL and I had to borrow off my brother until insurance came through.

Lots of it just isn't fair is it?