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Do you feel comfortable in your own skin?

16 replies

CloudClutching · 07/07/2019 19:21

If yes, what do you attribute this to e.g. upbringing, social class, special talents, having lots of friends, innate temperament?

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CherryPavlova · 07/07/2019 19:23

I think we’d all have something about ourselves we’d change but overall I am very comfortable. I think age helps to help us understand most things don’t matter very much.

EyesOpenWide · 07/07/2019 19:25

Yes and it’s totally down to age.

Kenworthington · 07/07/2019 19:26

Yes, more comfortable with every passing year. I’m now 43

MissSmiley · 07/07/2019 19:39

It's age that's brought self confidence for me
I'm happy in my body, it's not perfect by any means but I love it

Sunfull · 07/07/2019 19:49

Age, getting rid of negative people who constantly harped on about what I should or should not be doing. Realising that so long as I'm not harming anyone it's pretty cool to just be myself and it really doesn't matter about people who might not like that.

Realising that so long as I kept listening to people in my life who were either going to put me down because they didn't like what I was doing or be resentful and arsey because they didn't like what I was doing, I'd always have a massive negative critic banging on at me day in and day out (both those people and the internalise voice from it).

Finally making the choice as I head into my 40's to just enjoy who I am and fuck all that other stuff. Made me highly comfortable in my own skin - like I can breathe properly for the first time. It's lovely.

Took quite a lot of therapy to get there though (I have a really horrible family!!)

Haggisfish · 07/07/2019 19:50

Yes, I am and I mostly have been forever. Partly I have never had to worry about putting in weight, my mum never dieted or talked negatively about her body and my husband is always unfailingly complementary.

fromthefloorboardsup · 07/07/2019 19:55

Generally I am, although I have moments when I'm not. I would also say age (I'm in my 30s) and friends who are supportive and lovely.

cavalier · 07/07/2019 19:58

56 and loads more confident than I ever was
Life is too short for me now not to be
I appreciate every day and feel very blessed ... had many bereavements and my family keep me going .. everyday is a bonus ...

Redwinestillfine · 07/07/2019 20:03

Yes, I always have been. Probably mainly termperment. I have a strong sense of self and have never aspired to be thinner/ prettier/ more confident etc. I tend to hold my own opinions not to care too much whether people agree or not. It's one of the reasons dh likes me, probably a reason others may not Grin

WatchingDanEvans · 07/07/2019 20:08

I’ve worked every day since I was 16.
My DP has a silver ish spoon in his mouth.
I loathe his endless stories of where/how he grew up.
Today we met some friends (his) - it makes me feel small & insignificant.
What they don’t know is that in my lifetime I’ve made over £1 million & lost it all.
They see a country bumpkin.
I’m really seriously thinking of leaving tonight

CloudClutching · 07/07/2019 20:09

I don't often feel comfortable in my skin apart from when I'm in an environment e.g. work where I feel that I am valued by those around me, so rather based on external validation and what I can offer.

When I was younger I was hoping that age would sort out these self esteem niggles. I'm 48 now so that may never actually happen?

There are no profound reasons for my feeling lesser than and many people may not suspect that I do. Just feel unlikable deep down and friends seem to come and go. Have had a fairly successful career so it's not that I haven't fulfilled some of my potential but miss feeling 'alright'.

I'd say definitely that whilst certainly to shy I am possibly needing my own space a lot - but then have massive fear of missing out.

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CloudClutching · 07/07/2019 20:10

*certainly not shy

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womaninthedark · 07/07/2019 20:11

Not today.
Recently, yes. Therapy helped.

Pineapplefish · 07/07/2019 20:14

Yes, and in my case it's not related to age as I've always felt this way. I credit my parents for giving me so much love - I'm sure this helped my self esteem and sense of self.

lljkk · 07/07/2019 20:15

Mostly, yes, age is main factor (now early 50s).
Gosh I'm such a screw up. Expectations are low.
How do people who've done horrible things manage to continue? Or had something awful happen which they otherwise blame themselves for... but they have to carry on, anyway. And try to do better.

If they can manage, maybe I can, too. No point in self-pity.

CloudClutching · 07/07/2019 20:24

WatchingDanEvans lljkk Thanks

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