This will cheer y'all up........what will nursing / retirement homes be like in the future ?

[SkintAsASkintThing]

Something happened that got me thinking, I went to pick up my friend for a walk out. When I got there they were having a wartime dance / afternoon tea thing / sing song as they often do on Sunday.

Friend couldn't wait to get out of there and when we did had a rant about having old stuff forced on her. She isn't old (( well to me she isn't )) having recently turned 70. But poor health, mobility and lack of family have forced the decision on her.......she's right tho. Vera Lynn et Al won't mean a thing to her. She'd have only been 40 in 1990. She's a huge fan of the smiths and U2, she likes exotic foods which isn't being catered for and trying different things but feels she's being forced into a box which isn't built for her.

As I said.it got me thinking. What will they be.like in 40years or so ?? Will we be raving in the corridors wearing day Glo tracksuits ? >

I'm hoping for a care home stocked with real ale, good food, Stiff Little Fingers and Deep Space 9.

I like the same stuff now as I did 30 years ago and assume I'll enjoy similar stuff in another 30 years.

If not, I'll be opting out.

I visited a care home recently that runs "crossword and cocktails". I think I would enjoy that.

My mum was in a lovley care home in the last 2 years of her life but she was 91 when she went in and very very physically disabled ( though her dementia was very mild) so those things appealed to her. T
Most of the people in the care home seems to be very old. One was 106 and one 103. Most were in their 90s though possibly a handful were younger but in very poor health . The younger less disabled ones were in attached small flats with independence. They often volunteered in the home and could eat meals there if they had trouble making their own. Quite a few had carer visits in their flats. It seems to.work reasonably well, particularly as they then got used to the nursing home bott itself so if they're needed to live there eventually they knew it well.

I agree though that the entertainment was often aimed at much older people than 70 which suited a lot of them but definitely not all

I can't decide if it will be wall to wall gaming and VR, or if we'll become Soylent Green.

Seriously Skint, that kind of attitude to your Friend is unacceptable and warrants a word with the manager. Care homes are supposed to be ‘person centred’ and supposed to be Homes, not institutions.

In the future there will be two types of care home: one type that’s basically an end-of-life nursing home for the most frail state-funded residents and one type that’s like being on a cruise for self-funded less frail elderly who want the company and need a bit of hands-on help with daily living. It’s happening already: our society has fetishised ‘independence’ - living in your own home with carers coming in - but from what I see (and I’m in the trade) a lot of that is simply enabled isolation.

And wait till you get there before declaring you’ll top yourself if it’s legal and doable - I see a lot of people who could do that quite easily simply by stopping taking their medication, but they don’t, they want to live despite everything.

I'd like a care home I wa sin to be playing Hendrix, Grateful Dead, Rolling Stones, The Who & offering me a mild spliff to alleviate pain.

I will be listening to Bittersweet Symphony whilst playing on my Xbox.

Yes the war time music in nursing homes and elderly wards needs to stop , it was my Grandparents era all of whom have been dead for over 20 years my own parents are both 77 they were young during the 50,s and 60,s .

My friends and I figured it should be like a group holiday we took pre-kids, only with catering and assistants. Many of us are looking forward to having time to playing the computer games of our youth, with nice big graphics - Civilisation, SimCity etc - which we have no time for.

Given ease of making text bigger and all, I'd expect homes now to be providing guests with tablets and assistance, so they can email round the world, play games, watch what they want on TV, etc.

I love the Netflix Black Mirror episode, where old and very ill people can use virtual reality to be young and healthy and live in their perfect world.

She'd have only been 40 in 1990.

I obviously know this is correct but wow it never occurred to me that someone 40 in 1990 is turning 70 next year!

No wonder when I was a child my parents felt like the 70s has just happened, the same way I feel about the 90s.

@OralBElectricToothbrush your post is why Mumsnet should have a like button.
My wee Mum has just gone into a care home and it's breaking my heart. She has advanced Dementia and luckily doesn't know where she is. She thinks she works there. I manage Care at Home Services for the elderly and kept Mum at home for as long as we could, unfortunately she was becoming a real danger if she did not have 24 hour care.
We researched all the homes in our area and Mum is in the best, but it still isn't like home.
I know she is safe, well and eats good food, but gosh it is hard, bloody hard to leave her every time we visit.

I actually remember in probably 2000 or so Chris Evans on the radio asking the same question. He jokingly asked if we’d all be singing Wonderwall together in a sing-a-long obviously without really being able to imagine himself as a old person and finding the idea of old people who like Oasis pretty funny.

He’s now in his 50s and probably doesn’t find the idea as funny now! He was probably my age now at the time he was laughing about it on the radio.

I have no idea why it stuck with me the way it did.

For people your friend’s age she’s probably rather have an Oasis sing-a-long than a wartime one.

I work in a hospital unit where the majority of our patients are over 65. There's a huge difference in attitude / interests in the 'over 80's' patients versus the 'new older people' ones that are coming in who are in the 'late 60's / early 70's' group. Most of the latter group are all internet savvy, were of the swinging 60's generation, and have much more generally liberal attitudes and 'younger' interests. Unfortunately our occupational therapy team haven't quite caught up with the changed interests of the latter group, and all the ward activities are still 'listening to vera lynn' and doing jigsaw puzzles type activities. I'm hoping things will change soon though. I think care homes with movie nights, 80's hits playing regularly, and dominos pizza night once a week sounds pretty good.

That's really bad kitkat, as I said my parents are both 77 and were 3 years old when the war ended even somebody ten years older would be early teens when the war ended ,rock and roll was more my parents era not bloody Vera Lyn,When I worked on a day hospital ( for dementia) I kept asking why people in their 60,s would want to.listen to "roll out the barrel "," My old man said follow the van " etc and nobody could explain why it just had,ent occurred to them .

I expect to be tripping balls on magic mushrooms all day when I'm in a care home

I'm Gen X and looking forward to Wednesday Raves in my care home.

I think it'll be a blast.

I always wondered something similar. Will it be tattooed elderly folk in skinny jeans and hoodies and not blue rinsed ladies in polyester polka dotted dresses or old fashioned pleated skirts like my old granny used to wear.

I best take my mp3 player with me then.
Ide LOVE 80s tunes played though

Hopefully, full of laptops for gaming.

I was born in 96 so I'm hoping for early 00s R&B

I just asked my grandmother (72) and she reckons by the time I'm in a care home they will have "Killing Rooms" (assisted suicide) as a normal thing. She says she'd rather that then be in a care home.

I work in a very forward thinking care home.

We have physically fit residents in their 90s who lost partners, parents and brothers in the war. So to them it's still very much what they want and enjoy.

We have a few younger residents (early 70s)who have quite severe dementia and their cultural needs are catered for, however they seem to enjoy the 50s and 60s more than 70s,80s. I think they revert to a place of safety, for most that is their childhood. So anything later is not as well received. Obviously there will be exceptions and that is where the person centred approach comes into play.

Will it be tattooed elderly folk in skinny jeans and hoodies and not blue rinsed ladies in polyester polka dotted dresses or old fashioned pleated skirts like my old granny used to wear

Unfortunately not. I can tell you that as you age you need sensible, well-fitted clothing that's easy to put on and take off, easy to wash and stain resistant. Also sensible shoes so to minimise the risk of falls.

I'd love to think of us rocking our fashions of today in our 80s,but there's a reason our elderly have a certain style and it's down to comfort and practicality I'm afraid.

I live in Northern Ireland- don't think Vera Lynn in homes was ever a "thing" - particularly since where I'm from is predominantly Nationalist. One place dad was in got a chap in regularly to play showband tunes, the residents loved it.

our society has fetishised ‘independence’ - living in your own home with carers coming in - but from what I see (and I’m in the trade) a lot of that is simply enabled isolation. Very true, and also what a PP said about communal living.

And amazingly, Vera Lynn is still alive.
WW1 and 2 have very little relevance to the elderly today. There was a fete at our local care home this weekend and all I could hear was amplified WW2 songs. You might just as well play the popular tunes of the 1850s (whatever they were) and it would be about as meaningful.
It should be Stones/Beatles/Kinks/Elvis era onwards. Even my 92 year old fil was only 13 and still at school when the war started, but sadly he's got altzheimers, so really can't remember anything.
If I lived in a care home I would want a decent bar, excellent food and a good choice of music/tv/films. Entertainment would be gambling nights (poker, roulette etc), trips out to sporting events, informative talks and gentle exercise classes. In my room I would have a really comfortable recliner, a big screen and an X box, plus all the other gadgets I like. In fact, I quite fancy that now. Unfortunately old people's homes will probably continue to be places with mediocre food and a patronising attitude towards the residents. ("Are you all right dear?" and so on).