DS hair pulling getting worse

[meepmoop]

DS is a chronic hair puller he's nearly 2 and I just don't know what to do.

I had fill out a nursery form today as he had pulled a chunk of hair out of another girls head. They told me he's been quite bad at doing it today and he's had lovely 1 on 1 time with one of the workers. I'm guessing is a nice way of saying we've had to remove him from the group for a bit.

He was literally pulling another boys hair when I came to pick him up. Nursery worker didn't seem overly worried and still spoke positively of him although I suppose they have to.

I'm doing the same thing they do at nursery, remove from situation say use gentle hands you've made them sad etc. It's just not working.

I know I have to keep at it but it's really starting to affect me. I'm surprised people still keep meeting up with us for play dates as he just makes everyone cry all the time. I'm exhausted as I'm constantly hovering over him. I'm also 26 weeks pregnant so would love to sit down and watch him play nicely with his friends and cousins.

Sorry for the wall of text, it just feels endless

Has anyone else had this that has any experience or ideas on what I can do

One of my earliest memories is playing a game with my DF - I pulled his hair and he pulled mine back. I pulled his harder, he pulled mine harder. I pulled his hair softer, he pulled mine softer. The rules were understood by us both, even though I wasnt really speaking at that point in time.

I'm not sure it's traditional parenting advice but it did teach me that pulling hair hurt in an understandable fashion!

Does he pull his own hair OP? I follow someone on Instagram who’s son pulls his own hair out, and she made him a “hair bear”. Basically took the head off a teddy, made an opening in the top seam and attached some extensions then sewed it back together. Meaning her son was able to pull hair to his hearts content and his own was able to grow. Whenever he’s pulled all the extensions out, they just open it up and add more again. Might be worth a try if it’s the hair pulling he’s wanting to do rather than doing it to lash out at others?

Does he pull hair when he's angry/ frustrated or just for the sensory feel of the hair, or for the reaction he gets from their hair's owner?

If you work out what he's getting out of doing it, you can replace the behaviour with something equally rewarding but more socially appropriate.

Thank you for your replies.

He does it when he experiences any emotion. Excited, frustrated, angry, wants something someone else etc.

A doll with hair might work but I don't think he would go for it as it's a reaction instead of a want if that makes sense

He doesn't react when another kid does something to him so I don't think pulling his would work.