I have no idea what I'm doing, so over my head

[Habbos]

I've never really been around kids, especially newborns. I have no idea what I'm doing. Why don't newborns come with an instruction manual? How can you ask for help when you don't have specific questions, you just literally don't know what the f you're doing?

Most people don't know what they are doing with their first - they just don't admit it! As long as your baby is loved, fed, cleaned and has a safe place to sleep then you are doing grand!

You just muddle through it until they can start telling you what they want 😂

Don’t feel you have to be actively doing anything. Just sit on the sofa and hold/feed the baby ❤️ Get your partner to bring you stuff. Take loads of photos.

I developed a checklist. Can’t remember the details but
1 trust your instinct, and override any none professional
2 if not crying , all is well
3 sleep when it does
4 if crying it could be hot/cold/windy/dirty/hungry/tired/bored/overstimulated . Or just having a bad day.

Ahaa yes to this, I wish they came with instructions. I'm five months in with my first baby, and I'm realising that it's mostly a case of throwing shit at a wall and seeing what sticks (figuratively, obviously. There's more than enough literal shit to be dealing with).

So - baby cries: Hungry? Tired? Dirty nappy? Windy? It's just a process of elimination. As time passes, I've found that it's not that I know what I'm doing, I'm just getting better at winging it. Good luck!

Don’t feel you have to be actively doing anything. Just sit on the sofa and hold/feed the baby. Get your partner to bring you stuff. Take loads of photos.
Best advice ever.

Those first days are hard.

I always remember with my first it took about 6 days to feel competent and 6 weeks to feel confident.

The first week was a flurry of visitors and I had a lot of support..... but yeah I didn't know my baby's arse from him elbow to begin with (figuratively as per the PP)

Y'up. Remember the 'where the fuck is the instruction manual!' so well.

As PPs have said. For most of us it was a case of winging it by process of elimination.

I think I've just about got the hang of it... The younger one has just graduated from university Still, better late than never

Congratulations first of all!

I remember walking out the hospital doors with my first baby, thinking surely they are not just going to let me leave with him?! Its not safe! I can't possibly look after this real human properly!

Tell people how you feel, accept help, follow your gut instincts.

You were born inherently knowing how to keep a baby safe.

It'll get easier day by day.

Yes that’s another good point, sometimes babies just have a bad day. They’re human, albeit tiny. Us adult humans have hungry/full days, happy/grumpy days, tired/alert days. Babies can be the same.

Nobody has a clue what they’re doing. I have teacher friends, doctor friends, even a childminder friend and none of them had a clue what they were doing with their first child .

You can read all of the books in the world but none of it actually means shit when you’re holding the baby. Everyone kinda fumbles along and hopes for the best with their first.

Thank you all so much. It's good to know everyone feels this way!