Please help to calm my completely irrational anxiety

[mabelmylove]

I started a new job a month ago, just part time kitchen work. Things have being going really well so far but today around 3 hours into a 9 hour shift I started feeling really unwell. I have anxiety and managed to work myself up to the point of tears, and ended up asking the manager if I could go home. He was really kind to me, told me it was no problem at all, but since getting home all I have done is panic that I’ve made an awful impression having only been there a month, that I’ll go in for my next shift and be asked to leave as they think I’m a rubbish employee!

Sensibly I know I’m being very irrational and probably over dramatic but my mental illness is still there in the back of my head telling me I have completely fucked up!

You haven’t completely fucked up OP. When you say you started feeling unwell, do you mean mentally or physically?

Either way, think of it from the position of your manger. He just saw someone feeling unwell, asking to go home. It happens all the time. Perhaps it would be good to have in mind what you’ll say next time you go in as you’ll inevitably be asked how you are?

Do you feel able to share your mental health issues with your manager?

@Paddybare Physically unwell. I would usually fight through it if I felt unwell at work but the thought of 7 more hours on my feet in a hot, busy kitchen is what got me panicking, which in turn made me feel even less able to stay. I haven’t brought up my mental health with my manager yet as it’s something I’m nervous to bring up unless it would comfortably slot into a conversation iyswim? But maybe I should bring it up as the company seems to have a pretty good mental health policy.

It may be a good chance to bring it up, will you have a return to work conversation with your manager?

Is there any chance you have started peri menopause? I cant even stand in the chip shop long enough to place an order these days