How to get your life out of a rut?

[ChangeMyWorld]

Just that, really. Feeling a bit lost and hopeless at the moment.

On a good but not aspirational salary in a job that's very stable, good commute and work/life balance but no progression, glory and makes me feel I'm underselling myself. Every job I apply for has 200+ applicants which is terrifying so even getting interviews is a nightmare, let alone then being picky to find something with comparable package to my current role that won't impact my family negatively.

Don't feel like I have any true friends who genuinely care about me - the 1 I have, I'm actually sort of scared of and basically bullies me into getting her own way. I have no others and everyone I grew up with has ditched me.

DH and I's relationship is ok but that's it. Fairly mundane. Loving but very little intimacy through my fault because I'm utterly exhausted with life.

This country's politics are terrifying and stressing me out, the Brexit uncertainty dragging on and on is too much and amplifying my anxiety.

I do have hobbies which I enjoy and actively make myself attend to try and stop myself getting depressed, but just lately it's not enough.

I feel like I'm fast approaching the wrong side of middle age. That my job prospects are limited. I'm trapped in the (very expensive) area we live, the lifestyles we lead, the mundane job and relationship I have and in a world where Brexit and environmental catastrophe are all I hear about every minute. I want to run away but can't. I'm sorry.i know I sound like Eeyore but I'm feeling really quite desperate and genuinely looking for suggestions of how I can make things better when it's not just my choices to make because I have to move the mountains of my family too in order to make any significant changes?

Please be kind.

How about separating your life into different chunks and working on one at a time.

Work
Marriage
DC (not completely sure if you have dc)
Friends
Hobbies
The world

How about you start with your marriage first as it is arguably the most important one. Can you commit to a date night once a week and then plan and do something that will put you together with other couples, so you might also expand your friendship group at the same time as having fun with DH. Blue sky a list of stuff you would like to try, he would like to try and see where there is crossover.

Quiz night at the pub
Park run
Kite flying
Trampolining lessons
Book club
Kayaking
Skydiving
Swimming
Games night at a board game shop
Etc etc

Hi @SeaToSki thank you so much for replying. We have nobody to help look after our DCs which is a bit of an issue (yes we have DCs). DH and I are affectionate together and like watching tv together, he's one of the better things in my life, we just don't DO things together through lack of opportunity and tbh lack of shared interests. He does his hobbies 2 days a week, I do mine 2 days a week and we watch t.v. togetger the rest. When I do my hobbies, there are lovely people I chat to but I don't make friends as such...I find it incredibly hard to get close to people or become proper friends and they're all about 20 years older than me too.

What is the chance that one of the lovely people who you do your hobby with would babysit for you for a couple of hours on a Sunday afternoon?
Or one of them would like to meet up for a coffee and a chat with you one afternoon... dont rule people out just because they are older, some of my best friends are much older than me. Also they might know some other people you might meet through them

Your first job is to take one small step, ask someone at your hobby group to meet up for a coffee, or if they know of a babysitter or something else that you think of. Its just a small step, you arent committing your life to anything

I have stopped watching/ reading the news. I found that quite liberating. It's almost 100% irrelevant to me.

I hear you. Or are you me??? Though h has made one decision for me and wants out. I'm seriously considering whether I could rent my house out and travel or even sell it (my parents aren't getting any younger and I could move in with them once I've travelled for 2-3 years). The world should be our oysters yet we go to mundane jobs, eat spaghetti bolognase, and sleep next to a snoring guy whose boring because it's easier than change. Have a bit of a soul search, perhaps see a life counsellor? There's life out there to grab

@stuck yes!!! that's it. Although I don't really want to leave DH, I just wish he had the same itch for More because trying to galvanize my family when it's only me who seems dissatisfied is impossible. I want adventures, constant travel not one holiday a year. I want fulfilment and to actually go to sleep at night feeling like there's a point to my existence for anything other than because the kids want their mum...at the moment I really feel totally pointless. Trouble is, I DO soul search, constantly but can't find realistic ways to make any of it happen within the confines of family life.